Misconceptions
by BurningIce22
Summary: Lily has a secret.A secret that holds the reason why she began her 3rd year at Hogwarts with a livid hate of her former friend,James.Now,three years later her friends are set to find out why Lily hates him,but no one seems to know..not even James himself.
1. Zoning Out

Misconceptions

Full Summary—Lily Evans has a secret. A secret that holds the reason why she entered her third year at Hogwarts with black hair and a livid hate of her former best friend, James Potter. A secret she never told anyone about. Now, three years later her friends are determined to find out what James did to make Lily hate him, but no one seems to know...not even James himself.

Disclaimer: I do not own Lily, James, Remus, Sirius or anyone you recognize from the books; they are all creations of J.K. Rowling… I only personalized them a bit. So far the only characters that are all mine, are Sydney and Kelly.

**A/N: (updated ****8/22/07****… the others after this will still be the originals, including the one at the end of the chapter)**

**A note to new readers**: So I started this story three years ago. Over that period of time my writing has matured and changed (hopefully for the best). If you like where this is going but find the writing slightly immature or are annoyed by mistakes (like I realized I'd misspelled Lucius…and should mention am now quite ashamed of my younger self), I would strongly encourage you to keep reading. These things improve as you get farther in. A made a couple edits, of things that were really bothering me.

Just so you know, if something is in _italics _then it is someone's direct thoughts or dreams…this applies for the whole story. For this first chapter, please take note of time passing. Especially this line: "recalling a memory from **three years ago**". For some reason many people found this confusing and didn't seem to realize that three years had passed at this point.

* * *

**Zoning Out **

**mis·****con·cep·tion** _n._ (m s k n-s p sh n)

A mistaken thought, idea, or notion; a misunderstanding

_"I want it black," she stated, trying to keep her voice expressionless._

_"Are you sure?" asked a sugary voice, "You have such lovely hair."_

_"I want it all black." _

_"Well okay little girl, if you're sure. It will start to fade after a while and will be completely gone after six months" said the hair dresser in a more professional tone._

_"Perfect." The slim thirteen year old girl purposefully followed the lady to a barbershop chair and sat patiently as a towel was draped across her shoulders. The woman began to wash her straight red hair with the dye, slowly darkening its color until it reached a deep, __midnight__ black. Lily smiled grimly as she looked in the mirror at her new look. It was so very different from the scarlet locks that she was used to seeing, but different had been what she was going for after all. She dropped some silver coins on the counter, muttered a quick thanks to the lady, and dashed off to catch a bus to King's Cross._

_ "Lily!!" cried out two voices at the same time. Her two best friends ran to give her hugs. One of them, Kelly, looked at her again, for underneath a hat she saw a lock of hair that had escaped Lily's rushed attempt at hiding it. She gasped and Lily cursed under her breath._

_"Oh. My. God." She said in a slightly hysterical voice, "What did you do??" Lily cowered a little at this outburst._

_"I, uh… dyed my hair." Lily tried to confidently toss the answer out, but it ended up sounding rather weak. _

_"But black!!! You dyed your gorgeous red hair **black**! What possessed you to… W-why in the world would you want…" Kelly trailed off her rambling looking expectantly at Lily for an answer. She bit her lip nervously. The thing was she did have a reason, a very good reason, and a reason that she had absolutely no intention of telling Kelly, or anyone for that matter, anything about. A reason she planned on keeping a secret forever. She even had a few reasons. Mainly, she didn't want to stand out anymore, or be burdened with hair as conspicuous as a fire engine. Having red hair seemed to demand a lot. You had to be perky and outgoing and all those things she didn't think she could possibly succeed at after all that happened. Black hair seemed to have much more room to be moody or distant. Yes, black hair had a lot lower standards, a lot less to live up to. These all made sense to Lily, but she had an irksome feeling that they were all excuses to cover up the real reason she had woken up at six on September the first with the sole purpose of changing her 'look'. No, Lily had a rather bad feeling that all these excuses were masking one simple fact, **he** had had red hair. He had had red hair just like hers, and she didn't want to be reminded of him every time she looked in the mirror, not when it was all so fresh in her mind…._

"Lily? Earth to Lily, anyone alive in there?" Lily's mom waved her hand in front of Lily's half closed eyes. She shook her head a few times and rubbed her temples, trying to clear her thoughts, and absentmindedly ran a hand through her long scarlet hair. She was given no more then a second to wonder why she was suddenly recalling a memory from three years ago before her mother broke her thoughts once more by announcing their arrival at King's Cross. Lily hopped out of the muggle car and grabbed a cart. She gave her mum a big hug, saying that she would miss her and promised to send an owl as soon as she arrived. Lily walked towards the barrier between platforms nine and ten. She turned and waved one last time before walking right through the solid stone, away from the muggle world and toward the start of her sixth year at Hogwarts. It only took a few seconds to spot her friends.

She ran towards the bobbing, dirty-blonde head of her friend, Sydney Schwartz. All of a sudden Lily felt something hook around her ankle; she battled with gravity for a split second before crashing to the ground. She felt a searing pain in her left knee and silently damned Lucius and his unnaturally large feet. Then a voice called out her name asking if she was okay and a hand reached down to help her up. She gratefully took it, but her face fell as soon as she recognized her savior,

"Potter." she uttering his name with disgust and roughly pulling her hand away. She sent an angry glare his way that melted the happy expression right off his face. She brushed past him to join her friends without another word.

"LIL! Oh, I missed you so much. How was your summer? You've got to tell me everything, seven weeks is way too long." Lily smiled at her friend, Sydney always made her feel better and had a knack for making her forget about a certain dark haired Quidditch player who would remain unnamed at the present moment. She returned the greeting and began answering her questions. They were soon joined by their other best friend, Kelly Rivero, an attractive girl with dark brown hair to her elbows and electric blue eyes, who gave them both enthusiastic hugs and began chatting about her summer. A 7th year boy passed by the group and whistled at Kelly calling out,

"Hey there hot stuff." Kelly rolled her eyes and muttered an "Oh please" under her breath. The boy seemed to suddenly spot someone he knew and dashed off, revealing a light haired boy who lit up a smile as he recognized his closest girl friend,

"Remy!" Lily called out, running over to give him a hug, "How was your summer? How are you?" Remus Lupin looked down a few inches into the eager green eyes. He laughed a little, patting Lily's scarlet hair. The two began eagerly speculating who would win the Quidditch world cup this year, a discussion the two other girls eagerly joined. They were so engrossed that they didn't notice a tall, dark haired form approaching them until he spoke,

"What's this?" Kelly giggled as he put his hand on his hip, "Has Moony replaced me with these… these non-playing girls? I feel so betrayed." The black haired teen tried, and in the end utterly failed, to sound hurt. Sydney was indignant, but Kelly was the one to speak up.

"Excuse me Mister I'm-the-only-one-who-plays-Quidditch but it just so happens that Sydney here is the best damn chaser on the Gryffindor team." Sirius smiled guiltily at her as the others laughed at his predicament, for Kelly was a force to be reckoned with when her temper had been aroused.

Kelly laughed out loud as he backed a few steps away,

"I'm just giving you a hard time Sirius, calm down." She flashed him a grin and gave him a very enthusiastic hug. Lily noticed that they seemed especially friendly, even for Kelly and Sirius. Hmm… very friendly indeed. She made a mental note to mention this to Sydney later.

* * *

James did his best to avoid Lily after their brief meeting; after all she had been so cold with him that it was definitely best to steer clear of her for the time being. He sighed. It was still rather upsetting to see the girl who had once been his closest female friend acting so hostile towards him. The person who had sworn they would always be friends, who told him all her secrets. He sighed again, remembering how close they had been.

He supposed it was stupid to keep up the hope that one year Lily would once again give him a hug, ask about his summer, and everything would go back to the way it used to be. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that he didn't just **suppose** it was stupid, he knew it. I mean when someone spends three years acting hostile towards you and ignoring you completely it is pretty unlikely that they are going to suddenly forget that they hate you and go back to being your best friend. _James, the girl obviously doesn't want anything to do with you, just give up on her already_ he told himself. However, it was very hard to give up on the person who had been your best friend for two years. Especially when he had no idea why she had walked into the train station that year with a pained expression on her face and black hair; why when he had tried to give his usual greetings she had shot him a look of pure hate and walked right past him without so much as second glance.

* * *

A/N—Now review!!! I need to know if this is good, decent… absolute crap. Okay, maybe don't tell me it totally stinks…that would be kind of mean…at least give me some constructive criticism, tell me how to improve it. so if you have any tips, ideas, or things you don't like. Oh and one more thing, even if you don't like this chapter stick with it for a bit!! Once the story picks up more it should get more interesting. Okay now press the little purple button that says go and tell me what u think!!!!!!! 


	2. When They Think You're Not Listening

Misconceptions

Author: BurningIce22

Full Summary—Lily Evans has a secret. A secret that holds the reason why she entered her third year at Hogwarts with black hair and a livid hate of her former best friend, James Potter. A secret she never told anyone about. Now, three years later her friends are determined to find out what James did to make Lily hate him, but no one seems to know...not even James himself.

A/N: Omg thanx to everyone for the reviews!! So far everyone has been SOO nice! I apologize for the lateness of this update, but I was in Washington DC for a week, so I couldn't post or even work on this. Okay wanted to clear one thing up, cuz two of my friend got confused about this and I think other people might have as well. The whole section at the beginning of chapter one that was in _italics_ took place at the beginning of Lily's third year. Everything after that takes place at the beginning of her sixth year. Oh and a little FYI: remember anything in _italics_ means the person is thinking/dreaming it. Also whenever there is this: it means that either time has passed (could just b like later that day or a week or month later or w/e) or that the POV has changed. Little note to everyone, although I had my friend Sydney (yes the person I named my character after) read this over and make a few corrections, this didn't have a ton of beta work done. I edited it myself a bunch, but if u see any mistakes lemme know and ill change them.

Review responses:

**Mira White**: thank you so much for the nice review!! I will write as much and as often as I can… see authors note above for the reason this chapter was as late as it was, I did work as much as I could. Lol, I bet u are dying to know, but you aren't going to get the full answer to that very soon, as it is a main part of the plot… ill probably drop little hints in the chapters though, so look out for them.

**jess131346: **lol..yes black hair. And different is what im going for, I don't want it to be the same as what everyone else writes..boring!

**tarheelsrule01:** lol, I like ur sn. Omg thank you soooo much!! I totally plan on keeping up "the good work" and of course updating as much as I can. Again, see authors note for why this chapter was delayed.

**Jessie Flower:** Thnx for reading..and liking, lol. omg I 4got u had a Kelly(Kellie) too. Don't worry I didn't take the name from your story. It's from my friend Vanessa (Rivero) : when her parents were deciding on her name they wanted either Kelly or Vanessa. That's where I got the name. really u have? I haven't…so I didn't take it from someone. Thnx…and I will.

**AgiVega**: thnx for reading my fic. Hey I wudnt either, but this isn't me. Also, 'not standing out' isn't the main reason she dyed it.

**usedtobePERSONANONGRATA****: **thnx 4 da review syd. I feel so special to b smiled upon..lol. I smile baq at ya. Yeah my Sydney is named after you, I was going to tell you, but u were snowboarding when I was writing it, then I went away, and today I 4got. Glad u luv it :) thnx 4 the reminder, ill try and fit that in somewhere. Thnx for pointing out the mistake in chap one. l8ta hun. 

**gummybear****:** hey, thnx 4 reviewin it. That is actually something I didn't think about that much, but I'm not going to keep it with their times or w/e. besides, we don't really know what time hp is supposed to be living in. for all we know he's in the future, and lily/james were alive lik now. Who knows. Anyhoo… not doin it that way. Luv ya tons Claire Bear:)

To all my reviewers: thank you soo much for reviewing!! Please review as many chapters of this story as u can, even just to say u read it and liked it (or didn't). cuz reviews let me know that people are reading it, and as of now, liking it. Also it kinda encourages me to write faster and more (which is what everyone is begging me to do).

Disclaimer – If you recognize it, it's not mine. If you don't, it probably is. As always, no profit is being made and no copyright infringement is intended.

And now I will shut up, here is chapter 2:

When They Think You're Not Listening

_If you can't lose gracefully, learn how to cheat better!_

Lily gazed lazily out the train window, watching the flashes of scenery change behind the glass, lost in thought. She had very mixed feelings about the start of school. It would of course be great to see everyone again, and even the learning part of school could be kind of fun sometimes. But she still worried about things. This new Dark Lord seemed to be rising higher and posing more of a threat. She had a rather bad feeling that he should not be taken lightly. Plus there were a whole slew of worries she had carried with her since her Thirteenth birthday. She crossed her arms and laid her head down on them, still absentmindedly staring out the window. A knock at the door jarred her attention back to the room. Her eyes narrowed as an all too familiar voice asked for entrance.

"What about…?" James' voice trailed off, but she would have bet a whole lot that he was pointing at her. She was about to turn around and answer when Sydney spoke,

"Don't worry, she's asleep. C'mon in." _Oh asleep now am I? _Lily was about to point out their mistake when a thought came to her and she closed her mouth. A fiendish grin spread over her face. _I know how they talk and act when I'm there… but I have no idea what they say when they think I can't hear them. Hmm… maybe I'll play along for a bit and see what happens. Lily you know that you shouldn't do this, its wrong and betraying their trust. Oh shut up conscience. _She sighed,_ but it's true, I mean maybe this is a test or something. On the other hand, they'll never find out, and what they don't know can't hurt them. Besides…I'm getting **really** curious. _Lily smiled slightly and turned her attention to the conversation going on around her.

Lily laughed to herself as she realized what they were doing; the girls were writing on a muggle magazine page and giggling.

"Okay James," Kelly said in a faked professional tone, "your IQ level equals that of a bright nine-year-old." Sydney and Remus burst out laughing, as James was one of the smartest people they knew. James pouted slightly and finally pointed out,

"Well I suppose it's a good thing I'm not a muggle now isn't it." Kelly nodded vigorously and they both smiled. Lily was a little annoyed that her friends were having such a good time with James. _That traitorous bastard _she thought to herself. She knew she only wanted to protect her friends, but she couldn't just tell them not to like him. That was just plain mean, no decent person would ever do that, and certainly not Lily. She turned her attention back to her friends as she heard her name mentioned.

"Now you're sure Lily's sleeping," Sirius nervously asked Kelly.

"Yes, I'm sure," said Kelly in a rather annoyed voice. Sirius held his hands up in front of him as if to shield himself from her. Remus sighed a little as he glanced at Lily.

"You know, it really is kind of stupid that all of us can't hang out together just because Lily and James have this like war going on." Sydney nodded. Lily felt her stomach tighten, _this is all my fault. _James started to say something, but Sydney spoke first.

"You know, he's right. It **is** stupid, and we shouldn't let something like that get in the way of all the rest of us being friends. Neither Lily nor James has ever told us that we can't all hang out together…" She stopped abruptly, looking pointedly at James who clearly had something to say.

"Look you guys, I don't mind hanging out with Lily at all. And…" he sighed, "and I don't hate her, I never did." He watched their various expressions of surprise. Lily scrunched her eyebrows together in confusion for a second before she realized his ruse. "Look I dunno what you guys thought before, but… I don't even know why she hates me." Kelly's eyes widened and her eyebrows shot up. The others had similar reactions. Sirius spoke up.

"What do you mean you don't know. I mean you must have done something for her to hold a grudge for three fucking years." James shook his head slowly.

"Look man, if I knew I'd tell you. And your right, I obviously did something…I just wish I knew what." James sighed and ran a hand through his jet black hair.

"Well-l-l," said Sydney breaking the silence, "that sure explains a lot. And at the same time… makes it all the more confusing." She bit her bottom lip and furrowed her eyebrows in thought.

Lily, who had been hanging onto every word, cringed in disgust. _You may fool everyone else James, but you can't just talk your way out of this one with me. You lying jerk, I know you know. You were there, I saw you. _Despite herself Lily felt the drowsiness she had chased off before engulf her and she slowly drifted off to sleep for real.

Sirius checked his watch and announced that they had better go change before they arrived at school. The three boys hopped up and headed towards the door. James turned and looked at Lily. She looked so peaceful, breathing slowly, her scarlet hair splashed across the black tank she was wearing. He suddenly realized he was staring and quickly turned away, following his friends out the door.

Kelly smiled to herself, realizing she was the only one who noticed James' peculiar behavior.

Lily pulled the maroon drapes around her bed closed and tried to lose herself to sleep, but it refused to come. She kept thinking about the conversation she had overheard, playing over and over again in her head. Now that she had gotten over her disgust and anger at James' outright lying she began to worry about her other friends. She realized that she had never thought about the effect her and James' feud had on everyone else. She couldn't do this to her friends, and quite frankly she didn't like it herself. She, just as much as everyone else, wanted to hang out with Remus and Sirius whenever she wanted. She was a mature, sixteen year old girl. She could handle being around James for the sake of more time with her other friends, and all of them being happier. _I'll just ignore him. Just because we're all hanging out doesn't mean I have to talk to him… and I won't. He will be no more then another stone in the wall to me, just a part of the décor. And then everyone will be happy. Besides, _Lily smiled mischievously, _if they never hang out then how will Kelly and Sirius get together, I just **know** there's something going on there._ Feeling the tight knot that had taken residence in her stomach disappear, her mind allowed her to relax and float away into peaceful dreams.

A/N 2: ive already started chapter 3. and even if u didn't lik this chap that much (heck I didn't that much myself, but im waaaaay overly critical of myself) pleez stick with it, lol cant believe im begging. Ok nuf of that, I'll stop now. So ya know, break is over as of tomorrow, so I dunno how much ill b able to write during the week..weekends I will. Prob lik a chap a week, im hopeing. Anyhoo….go press the little purple button and tell me watcha think!!!!


	3. Midnight Chats

_Misconceptions_

**Disclaimer: if u recognize it, it's not mine. So far I only completely own Sydney and Kelly.**

A/N Okay putting the author and summary at the top of each chapter is getting annoying and pointless, so I'm stopping.  

Review Responses:
    
    **DarthIshstar****: **thnx for the nice review. Ur just gonna hav to wonder (or guess) until the chap where I reveal it.  Wow thank u so much! :)  

**GryffindorGoddess28**: omg thnx for such a nice (and long, lol..but long is gudJ) reviews!! Guess what? You are officially the first person to guess in their review what they think happened.  Not that im telling you if your right (*evil grin). It's more fun for you if you can guess without knowing until the time comes.  But just cuz im not telling doesn't mean don't guess..its fun to hear ur theories.  Lol yea I know what you mean, but if you ever want to make a correction, its fine by me… as long as your not mean about it of course, but your clearly not.  As for hints…im not just gonna tell you outright (lik I said, no fun), but if you pay attention in the chapters im gonna be dropping little hints and pieces of the story.  Its blue? Creepiness, well on mine its purple. O and thnx for being the ONE person who reviewed chap 2!!

Okay I tried to find a saying that worked for this chapter, but I couldn't and I wanted to get it posted. So it will have to go without.

Well..here's chap 3…now r&r!!

**Midnight**** Chats**

            Lily realized that if she told her friends the plan she had that morning they would all be suspicious and know that she overheard their conversation on the train.  So eight days later, when they had already had one weekend together, (during which Lily made a point of mentioning that it was too bad Sirius or Remus weren't there, so as to not surprise the girls too much when she brought it up later) she breeched the subject.  After dinner on Saturday she made her move.  She called the boys over from the other side of the common room.  James assumed she wasn't including him in this invitation, so remained sitting on the couch.  Lily shockingly called out to him and beckoned him over.

            "Hey Potter, get over here… this involves you too."  James complied immediately and hurried over; for he was dead curious what conversation she could possibly want him to take part in.  _Maybe she's stopped hating me_.  He laughed to himself, _Who__ am I kidding, it's been three years she's obviously not gonna just change her mind.  _He plopped down on the couch between Sirius and Sydney and looked at Lily curiously.

            "K I'm here, what's up?"  Lily took a deep breath, and then plunged into her explanation.

            "Well," she started, "I was thinking about stuff one night and I realized something.  You are all friends with each other… and I'm getting in the way of your friendship.  It's not like I've done it on purpose, believe me I would never do that.  But by hat.." Lily bit her lip carefully choosing her words so as to not be too insulting, "er, not getting along with Po..J-James, the rest of you, out of respect for me haven't hung out together as much as I know you want to.  And that's really nice of you all and stuff…but I'm a big girl and I really want you all to just ignore it, okay?  I'm serious, I feel totally terrible that I didn't notice this, or at least not consciously, before now."  James gave a slight smile feeling slightly hopeful.  Maybe, just maybe things would change now.  But Lily, as if reading his mind, spoke up again.  "Oh and James, don't think this changes anything between us."  James bit the inside of his lip looking uncomfortable. 

            "That's great Lil," Sydney said smiling at her.  But also, being Lily's best friend, she could tell what she was thinking, "but don't beat yourself up about this.  You didn't do anything wrong, so there's no reason to feel bad."  Lily grinned at her, feeling a surge of relief that, at least Sydney, forgave her. 

            "That includes the rest of us too ya know, no one blames you babe," Sirius said grinning.  Lily raised an eyebrow at him with an amused expression and gave a small laugh, dismissing it as usual Sirius behavior.  Kelly gave a long yawn, causing Sirius to laugh and prompting Sydney to tug Kelly and Lily towards the dormitory stairs.

*~*~*~*~*~*

            "Lily?"  A soft voice called out into the dark.  "Lily, are you awake?"  

            "No."  Sydney laughed, but abruptly stopped, looking around hoping she hadn't woken the others up.  But no, they were still breathing rhythmically and very much asleep.

            "Lil, why do you hate James so much?" Sydney asked bluntly.  Lily took in a quick breath.  _Damn, I should have pretended to be asleep when I had the chance._  Resigned to her fate, Lily pulled the curtain open and poked her face out.  

            "What?" She asked sleepily, hoping Sydney would decide her question, wasn't worth it… or better yet forget it completely.  But to Lily's displeasure she pursued it.  

            "Lily I know you heard me.  I asked why you hate James so much."  Lily sighed, tucking a loose strand of red hair behind her ear.

            "Look Syd, it's really not something I want to talk about.  Especially not at…" She reached for the clock and groaned, "three in the morning."  Sydney realized that it was useless to try and get anything else out of Lily at this hour.

            "K Lil, but don't think I won't ask again…G'night."  Lily frowned slightly.

            "Night."

*~*~*~*~*~*

            James plopped onto his bed feeling beat, for the boys had stayed up talking a good hour after the girls had gone up to bed.  He stripped down to boxers and shoved a grey shirt over his head before closing the curtains around him.  But instead of falling asleep he hopped into a sitting position.  A thought had been drifting around in his head ever since Lily's talk, and he decided to act on it.  He pulled the curtains apart, crossed to Sirius's bed, and rapped his knuckles on the bed post.

            "Knock knock, open up."  The curtains parted for James as a tired head poked out.

            "Wassamatter?" groaned Sirius brushing his dark hair out of his eyes.

            "Lily." He stated simply.  Sirius gave him a confused look.

            "Could ya be more specific mate?  Besides, what's changed that now it bothers you.  I mean the girl hasn't exactly been too friendly with you since third year, and just now it's finally getting to you?"  James looked slightly taken aback.

            "Nothing specifically has changed, and what makes you think it never bothered me.  It always has.  Especially right after it happened, I mean how would you feel if like I just randomly started hating and ignoring you.  Wouldn't you be bothered too?"  Sirius looked at him guiltily.

            "I guess I never really thought about it much.  I mean I would've asked, but neither of you looked like you wanted to talk about it, so I just assumed you had had some kind of fight that would blow over in a week or two.  And then, oh I dunno I guess it just kind of became routine and I didn't think about it.  I mean you never talked to me about it; you never told me it bothered you.  Besides, I still thought it was mutual.  Guess I probably should have been more observant of whatever, but you know you should have told me too."

            "I suppose maybe I should have set you straight, but I really didn't want to talk about it… to anyone.  And then later, oh I don't know, I guess I kept putting it off, and then it stopped seeming so important."  James gave a small sigh.  "God I just wish I knew why.  It's been tearing me up inside wondering… I've got to know."  Sirius gave a sympathetic nod.  Then shook his head as if clearing out of a daydream.  He laughed to himself, still shaking his head. 

            "Only at four in the morning, with a case of severe sleep deprivation could we 'talk about our feelings' with any hopes of keeping our pride and masculinity."  He and James both started laughing together until Remus made a grunt from behind the hangings that sounded remarkably like 'shut up'.  

            "Night Sirius," James whispered.

            "Night."

A/N2: well, hope you liked that chapie… I like it more then 2, but maybe that's just me. Lol, hope u all like sirius' sensitive side:).  Now I've only gotton one review for chapter two *sniff sniff :( So please review this one more!! I wanna know that people are reading this! Seriously take lik 5 sec to drop me a line..even if all ur review says is "I read it". Thnx all…now go press the purple (or apparently blue in some peoples case *shrug) that says go at the bottom of the page and tell me what ya think!!!


	4. Sleeping In

_Misconceptions_

A/N—OMG I got soo many nice reviews!! (in fact I havn't gotton one mean one yet :))  Thnk you sooo much everyone! I feel so luved, lol. 

**GryffindorGoddess28**: correcto mundo..no outright hints:)  oh don't get your hopes up too much, I still have plenty plans before I reveal my big secret…lol, luv the name u dubbed it with btw.  Hmm..interestin theories, again not sayin anything tho *evil grin.  O don't think long reviews are bad!!! I LOVE long reviews..the longer the better! O and after I put that coment bout the color at the end of the A/N ive gotton like at least two other reviews about it, lol.

**AgiVega**: Yeah I know its kinda short, they should be getting longer though.

**Aliya**** Black**: thnks for reviewing… lol glad ur so curious and 'can't wait':)… doin my best to update as often as possible.

**Mika-Mitch**: lol mine too, but apparently on some comp's it's other colors as one of my reviewers pointed out to me. Thnx 4 r&r-ing.

**Gummybear**: weird Claire..cuz I like made the same connection recently, I think JKR mite do something with that, lik when Sirius says almost all wizarding families are related. hmm… sry the attatchment thingy was fucked up, so now u can read it with the formatting rite and stuff...lol.

**Jaizar**** Black**: thnx! Glad ya like it:).  O don't you worry…I don't think ill be moving this story too fast.  That relationship won't get rushed. Yea I didn't really want to model her after the kinda cliché mind pic everyone uses.  Since I hav rather diff ideas. Hope u enjoy the other chaps

**LaurenlinElentari****: **lol..well that's the third color I've heard so far. Im so glad u liked it! Lol..lose sleep? Really? ill take that as a compliment. Thnks and I wont… I was just kinda not so confident with this being my first fic and all, but with all these positive reviews and now on the 4th chap… im won't b so 'beaty up of myself' lol. Thnx for the review.

**Katie**: omg you have no idea how flattered I am!! Thnk you sooo much! :D I am of course going to update as much as possible. Thnx so much for reviewing, especially such a complimentry one!!! 

**Silver Kisses**: thnx so much for reading, glad you like it! I will definetly keep tryin :)

**Claire:** glad u like it… I am clearly continuing it (this chap rather being proof of it) and will continue to.

**Egg-n-head:** thnks!! Lol yeah that was rather the point, im purposefully keeping it hanging, yes well ur not alone, evry1's askin….but my lips r zipped until that chapie comes, tho lik ive said b4, I will be dropping little hints and pieces of the story before I reveal it completely, so you will know a few things about it. I know..my poor baby! 

 next chap im gonna prob move the review responses to the bottom. Oh and just so you know, this chapter's quote has absolutely nothing to do with the chapter, just random thing.  I know this chapter is kinda shortish, but ive already written most of five, and I think it's already longer then this one. See I decided not to add the extra section to it, your consolation is that it shouldn't take as long as usual to update.

I would like to thank all my friends who beta'd this chapter and some of them for doing previous ones as well: Claire- sry the email was so fucked up, lol,  Molly- thnks 2 u no one asked if james was doing cartwheels. Ur an awesome beta…as long as u refrain frum killing off my characters.  Vanessa- always having fun with the pink highlighter.

 Now go read it and don't 4get to review!

**Disclaimer: JKR owns all…well mostly :)**

**Sleeping In**

_The uses for duck tape are only limited_

_ by the imagination of the person using it._

            The morning sunlight streamed in through the windows of the girl's dormitory.  A beam pierced through a crack in the curtains drawn around Lily's bed, making a bright circle of light on her face.  She moaned slightly as she shifted in her sleep, but she soon realized it was futile and sat up in bed.  She pulled the curtains apart and walked over to the offending window, staring out onto the grounds.  As her eyes scanned the green foliage she vowed to spend at least a few hours outside today, to savor what she knew was one of the last warm days before the cold of fall and then winter set in.  She shuffled through her dresser, searching for an outfit.  She selected and pulled on some fitted jeans and a green tank top and brushed out her auburn hair; just then she heard a stirring in one of the beds and a sleepy Kelly emerged.  She rubbed her blue eyes and shook her head, trying to reach some sort of conscious state.  Lily laughed quietly at her friend, then walked over to Kelly's dresser and threw some clothes at her… knowing Kelly she would probably forget or just decide she was too tired to bother (definitely **not** a morning person).  Kelly smiled appreciatively, and then headed for the showers.  Lily, alone once again, headed down to the common room to see if she could find some company.

            As she reached the bottom of the spiral staircase she surveyed the scene before her.  Some first year girls were studying franticly, looking quite terrified.  A few boys were gathered around a table watching a heated chess match.  A small third year with white blond hair that she recognized as Sofia, a girl she had rather adopted, was curled up in an armchair reading a magazine.  Then her eye's landed on Sirius, who was stretched out on a couch writing furiously in a black book, he looked up and she followed his gaze a few feet down: James was sitting across from Sirius on the floor listening to him talk excitedly about something.  Lily grinned; for she had a rather good idea what they were oh so excitedly discussing.  A few days prior, Snape and Sirius had had a little run in that had resulted in Gryffindor loosing twenty points; and Lily would bet a whole lot that they were scheming revenge.  

Suddenly Sirius' eyes met hers and he broke into a grin and rushed over.  "Lily my darling it really has been too long!" He put on a grown up air that made Lily grin and started giggling.  That was one of the reasons she loved having Sirius as a friend, he was always making her laugh and entertaining them all in one way or another.  "So, how are the kids?"  He asked matter-of-factly.  She laughed again.

            "I'm splendid thank you, and yourself?"  Lily said in a prim tone, playing along for a second before they both dropped the airs and walked (reluctantly on Lily's part) back to where James was sitting.  

*~*~*~*~*~*

James hadn't moved from his spot on the floor and simply watched as the two walked back over to him.  He noticed Lily's carefree expression tense up slightly as her eye's slid over him.  He considered offering her a greeting, but finally decided against it, knowing that her response would probably be emotionless or even nonexistent.  Ever since Lily had told the others that she wanted them all to be able to be friends (excluding him and her of course), she had taken to ignoring his presence.  She obviously didn't want to dampen the mood with mean remarks, so she simply didn't respond to anything James said unless it was a direct question… and even then he wasn't always so lucky.

He looked up and noticed Kelly entering the room with a yellow towel wrapped around her head.  Lily noted with satisfaction that she also looked completely awake.  

"Hey guys, what's up?"  She plopped onto the couch next to Sirius, pulled the towel off and started drying her hair vigorously.  Sirius gave her an odd look.  "What?  Never seen a girl dry her hair?"  Sirius was spared answering by Remus distracting the others with his presence.

"Hey Lils." He gave her a light hug.  "Kelly." She nodded in greeting.  He motioned towards the black book Sirius had been writing in.  "Any luck?"  

Sirius gave a very mischievous smile.

"Oh I don't feel its ideas we're lacking in Moony old pal… I think it's rather a more lenient Ministry."  Remus and Kelly both laughed probping Sirius to hop up and take a rather dramatic bow.  

Lily gave him a friendly shove,

"Well aren't we modest."  

He grinned, "Don't you know it." 

James glanced at his watch, "Hey guys, we should head down to breakfast."  He motioned the others towards the portrait exit.  Kelly started to follow him, but suddenly realized someone was missing. 

"Wait wait wait… where's Sydney?"  asked Kelly with an expression of bewilderment.  Lily knew why, for Sydney was an early riser, usually the first up of the group, and a general morning person.  Lily was thinking along the same lines, and jogged towards the stairs throwing an 'I'll go check' over her shoulder.  She walked over to Sydney's bed and drew the curtains apart.  She was shocked to find her friend still sleeping peacefully.

"But she never sleeps this late."  Lily muttered to herself.  "Syd?  Syd, time to wake up."  When she got no response she shook her shoulders a bit.  "Syd come on you gotta get up."  The lump under the covers shuddered slightly as it omitted a long groan and then remained motionless.  Lily, getting slightly impatient by this time, ripped the blue comforter back down to her knees.  Sydney sprang up, immediately regretting it.  

She put a hand to her forehead trying to stop the world from spinning wildly before her with a pained expression on her face. 

"Ohh, my head."  

She moaned again, now clutching her stomach.  "I feel awful."  

Lily examined at her friend more closely.

"You look it too."  Lily said with concern, "Come on, we better get you to the hospital wing."  She tugged at Sydney's hand, who obediently stood up but was immediately overcome by another dizzy spell.  Lily immediately sat her down on the bed again.  "Shit.  How are we supposed to get you there when you can barely walk?"  She chewed her lip thoughtfully.  "Wait here Syd."  Lily jogged back down the stairs back into the common room.

"Sydney's sick," she announced, and began explaining the situation.  As soon as she was done Kelly piped up.

"Um hello, why don't we just go tell Madam Pomfrey she's to sick to move and let her handle it?"  

Sirius flashed her a grin. "Brilliant."  Lily nodded in agreement, and then suddenly, realizing they were just sitting there doing nothing, hopped up and hurried towards the door.  Remus tore after her with Kelly and Sirius on his heels.  James hesitated for a second (wondering if Lily wanted him to come too, but then again, Sydney was his friend too) before tearing after the others.

*~*~*~*~*~*

As soon as Madam Pomfrey settled Sydney down she chased the others out into the waiting room.  As a last minute thought she waved her wand and five late slips appeared.

"Now OUT! All of you.  Shoo…get to class."  They exchanged fearful glances and dashed out the door.

A/N2: okay peoples I already have a big chunk of chapter 5 written, so hopefully that won't take too long. No go press the small square button that might be purple, might be blue, or might be 'a grayish color' that says go on it and tell me what you think!! peoples I absolutely luved all the reviews I got for last chapter…besides *hint *hint reviews motivate me to write more!!


	5. Visiting Hours

_Misconceptions_

A/N: hey everyone, here is chapie numba 5. The review responses have been moved to the bottom end of the chapter. If you liked them better up here, or like them better at the bottom…lemme know in you review. Just changed one little detail on this one, made Jordan in 7th year instead of 6th. Cheers!

_Disclaimer: JKR owns the hp world and characters. I'm just playing with them._

Without further ado….chapter five:

**Visiting Hours**

_ "If they say TV's so bad for you_

_ then why do they have one in _

_ every hospital room?"_

Lily sat with her chin propped up on her hands, watching the clock hands tick through molasses. _I swear, if the thing were any slower it'd be going backwards._ Lily was especially anxious to finish the last class of the day; for after three days of being forbidden to see their friend, Madam Pomfrey had finally granted them permission to visit. Lily's eyes glazed over as she stared at Professor Binns (or rather through, since he's a ghost), clearly not taking in a word he was saying. James was absentmindedly watching his 'quick notes quill' (A/N an unbiased and less advanced version of Rita Skeeter's quill) as it scribbled furiously across the parchment in front of him. Kelly was asleep on Sirius' shoulder; who was in turn doodling on a scrap of parchment. When Lily peered over, more out of boredom then curiosity, she saw a number of small stick figures labeled Snape, all of which seemed to be caught in an array of humiliating situations. Lily glared up at the clock. _You've got to be shitting me… it has so been more then two minutes._ She sighed, _damn clock. _

An eternity later, Binns dismissed the class. Lily was so tired and lost in thought that she just remained sitting where she was. Sirius gently shook Kelly awake and they both walked out of the classroom. James started to follow them, but noticed Lily still sitting in her seat. He walked over to her.

"Come on, let's get outta here." He held out his hand to help her up. Lily, purposely ignoring the hand and its owner, got up on her own, determinedly brushed past James, and walked out the door. He sighed inwardly and headed in the opposite direction. He had noticed that Lily looked very uncomfortable whenever the two of them were alone, and they were bound to meet in the hallway. So he decided to go for a bit of a walk to allow her ample time to reach the common room alone.

* * *

Lily plopped down onto a maroon couch between Kelly and Sirius. She remained silent and glanced around the room. She noticed Sofia working at one of the tables, chewing on her quill with an expression of extreme confusion on her face. Lily walked over, and peered over Sofia's shoulder to see what she was working on.

Sofia looked up at Lily and gave her a stressed smile. "Hey Lil."

"Hey Sof, you need help?"

She grinned broadly. "Yes!! Could you?"

"Say no more." Lily summoned an unused chair and sat down.

Across the common room Remus and Sirius were talking. Remus had a slightly worried expression on his face and kept repeating different versions of the same question.

"Do you think she's okay?"

Sirius groaned. "For the eighty-billionth time, yes!! I'm sure she just needs a potion a good night's sleep." Remus didn't look very reassured.

"But what if she has some terrible disease? What if she's really sick? What if she dies?!?!" Sirius eyed him strangely.

"Woah there boy, calm down." He placed his hands on Remus' shoulders and stated very slowly and clearly, "Remus, mate, chill, out." Remus sucked in a big slow breath and nodded looking at him apologetically. "Is it that time of the month again Moony?"

"Ugg, Padfoot! Don't make it sound like I'm PMS'ing. That is so wrong." Remus shuddered at the thought.

"What? It's like the same thing. You **do** get moody for about a week every month." Remus sent him a death stare and, choosing to ignore the last comment, he simply continued the conversation as if his moronic friend hadn't just insinuated that he went through feminine cycles.

"Sorry Padfoot. Guess I was getting a little overly worked up."

"Hmm, you don't think," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Remus crossed his arms and glared at Sirius.

Out of the corner of his eye he noticed that James had finally caught up to the group. Remus jumped up to meet him, dragging Sirius after him.

"What took you so long? We were waiting for ya, come on lets go visit Syd." James gave him a questioning look, shrugged, and turned right around to wait by the portrait hole. Sirius followed him, then turned back towards the girls and called out, "Hey, Lily? Kel? You guys comin' or what?" They both hopped up protesting in unison,

"Of course!!" Kelly glared at Sirius, causing him to cringe. All four walked to the door, joining James, and out into the hallway.

* * *

Lily's quickly found Sydney. Lily hesitated for a second, for she looked rather paler then usual and weak. But her face broke into a huge grin as she spotted her friends.

"Syd!! How are you feeling?" Sydney smiled at her concern, then looked up, acknowledging the others presence.

"Hey guys." There was a moments pause before everyone rushed forward and bombarded her with questions.

"Are you okay?"

"What do you have?"

"How do you feel?"

"When can you leave?"

"How the hell do you do the Herbology homework?" Everyone stopped,

"Sirius!!" They all glared at him, he smiled sheepishly back. Sydney burst out laughing and the others joined in. Just then Madam Pomfrey came striding in with a large goblet that was smoking slightly. Remus quickly stepped aside to clear a path for her, praying she wasn't about to throw them out again. She handed the goblet to Sydney, who downed it in one gulp. She scrunched her face up in disgust and grabbed a bottle of water from her night table to wash away the taste. Then Madam Pomfrey turned to the others, acknowledging their presence for the first time.

For a minute she looked like she was about to throw them out, but then her expression softened. "Oh all right, you can stay." She said, answering their unasked question. "But only five minutes, and then I want you all out!" They all chorused their 'thank you's, then crowded back around Sydney, determined to make the most of their short visiting hours. Remus and Lily both hopped up on the bed, sitting on either side of Sydney, James perched himself on the footboard (headboard at the other end of the bed and lower), and Sirius just stood their waving his homework looking confused. But when he realized no one was listening to him, he gave up, sat down in a wooden chair, and joined the conversation.

* * *

Ten minutes later they all (minus Sydney of course) entered the great hall for dinner. Lily dropped onto a comfy chair at the Gryffindor table next to Remus. She had not been seated more then a minute when someone appeared in the empty chair beside her. He had spiky blond hair and ice blue eyes, she immediately recognized him as Jordan, a seventh year in Gryffindor.

"Mind if I sit here?" Lily smiled at him and shook her head. In doing so she missed James' death glare at the boy. Lily grabbed a bowl of mashed potatoes and spooned a heaping pile onto her plate. She politely offered some to Remus and Jordan who each accepted gladly. She dug her spoon in and eagerly began eating it with a blissful expression on her face. Sirius burst into hysterical laughter when he got a look at her face.

"I guess someone likes potatoes."

Lily glared at him. "I like comfort food, you gotta problem?" Kelly looked menacingly at him right on cue. Sirius backed down, shaking his head hurriedly. Lily giggled and leaned over to Kelly, whispering so that only she could hear, "You've got him whipped and you're not even dating." Kelly uttered a cry of protest, but knew she couldn't draw too much attention to herself without the others getting curious, and she sure as hell didn't want **that**… she was also pretty sure that was the reason Lily had chosen this moment to say it. _My crazy scheming friends_ she laughed to herself, shaking her head slightly. She looked up at the friend in question and immediately clapped a hand over her mouth to stifle the laugher escaping her. Lily happily was talking to Remus about something, completely oblivious to the fact that Jordan was just sitting there staring at the back of her head with a distant look in his eyes. _Looks like someone has a crush.__ I just hope the rumors about him aren't true. _

* * *

Lily, Kelly, Remus, Sirius, James, and Jordan were all sprawled on various couches and chairs in the common room all involved in one of the various conversations going on. Perhaps if Lily had been paying more attention, she would have noticed that James purposefully placed himself as far away from Jordan as possible and kept throwing him dirty glares when he thought no one was looking. But she wasn't paying attention, she didn't notice… then again there were so many things she hadn't noticed.

"So then all of a sudden, his head turns into this huge, hot pink flower!" Sirius ended the story he had been entertaining Lily, Jordan, and Kelly with; who were all shaking with laughter and applauding as he curtsied enthusiastically.

Kelly let out a huge yawn, prompting a laugh from Sirius. Kelly glared at him and announced she was going to turn in. She said goodnight to the boys and walked up.

* * *

Twenty Minutes later, Lily entered the dormitory and much to her surprise, found Kelly awake on her bed.

"Hey Kel," said Lily. She plopped down onto her bed and slipped her shirt off over her head.

"So, did I miss anything?" Kelly sat on the end of Lily's bed, talking as her friend changed.

"Nothing important, just a few more Sirius' 'heroic' stories of Marauder pranks and some Quidditch talk."

Kelly laughed, "Typical boys." Lily nodded.

"Hey Lil? What do you know about Jordan?" Kelly's voice had gotton slightly more serious. Lily threw her a quizzical look.

"Umm, that was random. Why do you ask?"

"I dunno, he just like all of sudden started hanging out with yo…us."

Lily thought for second. "I don't really know much about him, just that he's in seventh year and in Gryffindor."

"What did you think of him?" Lily gave her an even weirder look.

"What is this anyway, twenty questions?" exclaimed Lily indignantly.

Kelly's face spelled out total bewilderment. "Twenty questions?"

"Oh, it's a muggle game…forget it." Although Kelly was more informed then many pure blood wizards on muggles from having spent so much time with Lily in the muggle world, she did not have nearly as tight a grasp on it as Lily did (being muggle born and all). Kelly looked pointedly at Lily, clearly expecting an answer to her question.

"I don't know, he seems nice and all. I mean I didn't exactly talk one-on-one with him or anything."

"Uh huh," said Kelly slowly, thinking.

"Um, Kel?"

"Yeah."

"Why do I get the feeling **you** know something about Jordan that I don't." Kelly shook her head.

"No idea," said Kelly trying to sound casual. Suddenly a girly grin spread on her face.

"Soo, Lil." Kelly tried, and failed, to sound totally innocent. "Who do you like these days?" Lily giggled.

"No one." Kelly gave her a look that clearly said she didn't believe a word her best friend was saying. Lily read it like a book; the two of them, along with Sydney, had an almost psychic ability from years of being friends that allowed them to know what the other was thinking most of the time.

"Suuurrre." Kelly dragged the word out.

"I'm serious!!"

"Whatever." Lily sighed slightly. Then let out a long yawn.

"I'm tired," she stated and pulled the curtains around her bed closed and dove under the covers. Kelly stared blankly at the curtains of Lily's bed, and slowly felt the tides of sleep overtaking her. Just then, a voice called out,

"Kel?" A male voice.

A/N2: lol, ok well its kinda a cliffie. Now all my luvly reviewers frum last chap get their responses, thnks so much to all of you!!

**Jess131346**: im afraid its not that simple, lol since I have gotton a total of four different colors mentioned that their button is. Glad you like it:). I am of course going to reveal what happened, but only when the proper time comes… the red haired man's connection will also be revealed in time. Nuff said, don't wanna ruin the plot. Thnks for reviewing, pleez keep r&ring

**Nightwanderer****:** glad you like it! Thnk you..i will of course!

**Dk**** Lili:** so happy u like it:) join the club, lol…that's wut everyone wants to kno. Lik I said..it shall b revealed in due time. Thnks 4 reviewing.

**GryffindorGoddess28**: lol u still remain the one person who reviews every chapter..congratz, lol. Sry hun, no hints. I'm sure ur luvly logic will at least come up with some ideas. Inside joke…It would appear so, wudn't it. Yea its pretty funny how many people responded to that one little comment bout the color: o and we have a new one: green. Guess you'll have to keep wondering, since I didn't tell ya this chap :-D im so evil. Lol..omg that's reely funny….cuz after my beta (or rather one of the many, lol) molly read this chapter she was saying I shud kill off syd. Funky how u guys think the same…or rather oppositly. Lol well I cant reely kill peter, as that wud kind of drasticly change the future of harry potter and all. But u may have noticed I haven't even mentioned him yet…I mite just exclude him frum this story bcuz he annoys me to no ends (haven't decided yet). Hmmm…lips r zipped as always, sry hun…misconstrued…lol, yea funky wrd. It was wonderfully long…and see I even give u a response to fit the length of the review. Ps-wuts up with using zero's in the place of 'o'? jw

**HPwanabe****:** thnks!! Glad u like it. Thnks 4 reviewing.

**pInKpIlLo6: **thnks! Lemme kno wut you think of the rest of it. U play soccer? Awesome, me 2!! Np..always lookin 4 gud stories. 

**Safsaf****:** wow thnx!! I'm flattered.

**Sailor-Song731:** thnk u! lol..another color to add to the list. I use that expression too:)

**Amalia**** Lupin:** thnks you:) well let me know what you think of chapters two, three, and four once you read them. Thnks for reviewing. Lol, u sign reviews same as me…or at least this one.

**Gummy bear**: yeah I know he hasn't made an appearance, and he may not. I haven't really decided about this yet. See peter annoys me and we all hate him. But the thing is, he technically wasn't bad back then, and the others really liked him..he was one of their best friends and they trusted him with lily and james' lives. So I'd have to make him like…semi good, and have the others like him. Im still debating. He might just kind of be around in the backround.

**Laen****:** thnks so much for reviewing. Wow thanx! Hoohoo another theory..i luv hearing them:) unfortunately I have can't tell u, its more fun for you to just guess and not know until the time comes ( I know im evil). But if u have any other ones…by all means, share 'em. Its fun for me to see what you guys think—how close you get.

**Snowman1400:** thnk u! lemme know wut u think of the other three chaps. **Truegryfinndorgrit****:** thnks. Yeah she's coming out a tad darker then I first thought, but it's really like only when she's around James. She's pretty normal when he's not there…its just that so far he's there almost all the time. Well of course I let it out…eventually. Lol, don't we all. No prob, my pleasure. Thnks 4 reviewing mine. 

Okay peoples, its that time again!!! Time to review. Don't forget to lemme know if you like the responses best at the top or bottom. I know it's a totally trivial thing, but im curious. Press the square box in the color of your choice (so far I've heard four different ones: green is the new addition to the list) that says 'go' and tell me what you think!!

Go

On

Its

Right

Down

Here

l

l

l

V


	6. Detective Black

**A/N: hey everyone, thnks for all the positive reviews!! With five chapters up, I got 54 reviews:) Sry this chap took a bit longer to come out, but I hadn't started writing this when I posted last chap… and then I was having a really busy week. Plus..well I didn't exactly have writers block….i was just like.. uninspired. Lol…. So it took a while to get started on it. Then of course my beta cough Claire cough (jk I luv ya girl, and I know we're all busy) took forever to give me corrections :D**

**O and peoples, if you are ever wondering when to expect an update or perhaps why one is taking so long, or even if your curious how far ive gotten on the next chapter then check out my profile under 'story status' and it will most likely be there. Also, if anyone is curious as to the answer to the age old question of whether James Potter was a seeker or a chaser, I believe I have found the answer… my 'evidence' is also posted in my profile. ****Also, if anyone has any gud fics that they want to recommend, im always on the lookout… so feel free to suggest one in your review. I also know a slew of fab stuff…much of which can be found in my 'favorites' section in my profile… but if you tell me what your looking for I'll give u a recommendation as well.**

**Thanks a bunch to my two friends and betas who read over this chapter for me.****Vanessa- who knew discussing my fic cud b used to distract me from, err cough certain events. Congrats on the "bob" hug :D****Claire- thnks for all the help….no worries bout the time it took. I think ive said this in like three places in this chapter..but w/e. luv ya hun! Cloop u..hehe:D. **

**Disclaimer: The hp world and characters belong to our luvly frend JKR… whatever u don't recognize is the product of yours truly.**

**Well just in case you forgot where we were…here's ****ur**** little flashback frum chapter 5:**

"Why do I get the feeling **you** know something about Jordan that I don't." Kelly shook her head.

"No idea," said Kelly trying to sound casual. Suddenly a girly grin spread on her face.

"Soo, Lil." Kelly tried, and failed, to sound totally innocent. "Who do you like these days?" Lily giggled.

"No one." Kelly gave her a look that clearly said she didn't believe a word her best friend was saying. Lily read it like a book; the two of them, along with Sydney, had an almost psychic ability from years of being friends that allowed them to know what the other was thinking most of the time.

"Suuurrre." Kelly dragged the word out.

"I'm serious!!"

"Whatever." Lily sighed slightly. Then let out a long yawn.

"I'm tired," she stated and pulled the curtains around her bed closed and dove under the covers. Kelly stared blankly at the curtains of Lily's bed, and slowly felt the tides of sleep overtaking her. Just then, a voice called out,

"Kel?" A male voice.

**yet**** again another unrelated quote. Also the stupid quick edit thingy isn't letting me use the astrix and squiggly line combo for a change of time or POV or w/e...so im using a line as substitute. And without further ado, I give your chapter 5:**

****

**Detective Black**

__

_If a tin whistle is made out of tin, _

_what__ exactly is a fog horn made out of?_

Kelly was shaken from her thoughts by a voice calling her name. She pulled apart the curtains and crept curiously down the stairs, in the direction she had heard it coming from. She was eternally grateful that she was wearing flannel pants and a ribbed tank to bed instead of anything too, well, revealing. It wasn't her fault that that insane Aunt of hers liked sending her sleepwear that was, as her mother liked to refer to it, 'scandalous'. As she rounded the corner she found herself face to face with a teenage boy in pajamas.

"Sirius?" she asked groggily questioned him, in total confusion. He gave her a cheeky grin and brushed his shaggy hair out of his face.

"That's my name."

Kelly rolled her eyes. "Well...care to enlighten me as to the reason you summoned me from my bed at," she glanced at her watch, "quarter past midnight?"

"I would be delighted to." She gave him an expectant look. "See, I wanted to talk to you. And this was kinda the only time that we wouldn't be surrounded by people."

"Obviously, however you failed to address the crucial point of what in hell you needed to discuss with me in private…let alone in the middle of the night!" said Kelly, her volume escalading higher and higher as she began to lose her temper.

"Wow, someone's **not** a night person," Sirius muttered just loud enough for her to hear quite clearly.

"No, I am a total night person. I am not, however, a morning person… and it has been morning for fifteen minutes, so I am perfectly justified." Sirius looked like he was going to say something, but any attempts at speech were cut off as Kelly continued, curiosity taking over her annoyance. "So, what exactly did you want to talk to me about anyways?" Sirius beckoned her over to the couch and she obliged, plopping herself down next to him.

"Well," he started, "I wanted to discuss our two friends, Lily and James. Or really Lily, mostly." Kelly gave him a very confused look; this was not what she had expected.

"Go on," she prodded.

"Right. I need you to tell me everything you know about the summer Lily turned thirteen." Kelly shot him a probing look.

"Um, why?"

"It's like this; I'm doing a little… detective work for James. I want to figure out why Lily hates him, and I think that it is probably something that happened that summer. I mean don't you? Remember how the last time we all saw each other, I think it was in early July or something I think, anyhow they were totally normal and friendly to each other. And then when we arrived at the station she acted like he was the scum of the earth."

Kelly nodded to herself. "Yeah, I think you're right. And I wish I could help you, but I haven't the foggiest idea what happened. Me and Syd both tried to talk to her, but she totally refused to spill. So we eventually gave up and stopped trying. But hey, I'm willing to make a fresh attempt." She smiled slightly at him.

"Well let's start with what you **do** know. I mean you must know something about it, even if its stuff that doesn't seem connected. Let's just brainstorm here." Kelly cocked her head to the side and laughed quietly to herself. "Are you laughing at me?" Sirius protested looking offended.

"Not at you, per say. It's just," she burst into a fresh wave of giggles, "you sound so serious, like I don't think I've ever seen you like this before." She covered her mouth and gave a very fake gasp, "What is this? Is the famous Black showing a, **shock, horror**, sensitive side?" she teased.

"Hey!" Sirius protested, punching her playfully in the arm. She rolled her eyes at him. "Are you gonna help, Kel, or not?"

"Of course, I'm just making an observation," she declared in an innocent tone.

"Rigghht," he said sarcastically. "Whatever, lets get back to the problem, shall we?"

"But of course. Now let's see…three summers ago. Hmm. I mean she dyed her hair black on September first, but of course you already know that."

"True, but who knows, it could be related. Continue." She nodded. Kelly sighed as she closed her eyes in concentration. They spent the next half an hour pulling out memories of their past and trying to make some sense of them. By the time one o'clock rolled around they were both exhausted and Kelly was getting slightly frustrated.

"Look I really don't remember anything significant. We all met in early July and then went our separate ways. I'll let you know if anything else comes to me later. Now can I go to sleep?!" she pleaded. Sirius nodded apologetically.

"Yeah, of course. Have fun." She rolled her eyes.

"Night." Kelly got up from the couch and walked towards the stairs.

"Night," he called out after her. She nodded her head in acknowledgment and continued her ascent.

* * *

Sirius was abruptly jarred from his pleasant dream by a loud bang off to his left. Cursing under his breath he ripped apart the curtains and yelled out in an extremely annoyed voice which escaladed in volume as he went.

"Whoever is making that racket better shut their trap before I make them wish they had!" James and Remus froze as soon as they made out the threats being thrown their way. Quickly and quietly they gathered up the remains of their card castle and hurriedly pushed the exploding snap deck into its case. James hesitantly crept over towards his friend's bed.

"Hey, err Padfoot, mate?" He cringed as Sirius whipped around glaring daggers at him. "On second thought, maybe now's not a good time." He mimed edging away.

"Yes, well if **someone** hadn't woken me up at the ungodly hour of," he looked at the clock and frowned, "seven o'clock! Why didn't you tell me we only had five minutes until breakfast??" he demanded. Remus started laughing at his friend's panic.

"Well, you know we were rather preoccupied with the death threats and all." Sirius sent him an 'if looks could kill' glare and wrenched open a drawer. He tugged on some loose jeans and a black t-shirt. He glanced wistfully at the bathroom door. James waved his hand in front of his face. Sirius pouted as James dragged him towards the stairs.

"Oh come off it, you'll survive one morning without your beauty shower." Sirius grumbled sleepily but allowed his friends to drag him into the common room.

"Hello girls," said Remus as he spotted Lily and Kelly walking towards the exit. They both turned around and waved. The boys caught up with them and all five walked down to breakfast together.

Remus turned to Lily and asked, "So do you know when Sydney gets out."

"No idea," she said shaking her head. "Me and Kel are going to visit her after classes though. You're welcome to join us if you want. All of you can." They nodded their consent and agreed to meet in the hospital wing after before dinner.

Sydney reached the last page of her magazine and dropped it back down onto her night table, then started another one. But she just couldn't get into this one. She was utterly bored of sitting in bed all day reading magazines and eating the candy her friends had dropped off. She sighed and let the magazine slide out of her grip and slither its way onto the floor. Madam Pomfrey chose that moment to walk up to the bed with a slightly fake looking cheery expression on her face.

"Miss. Schwartz, time for your blood test." She announced.

"Oh joy," muttered Sydney, half to herself.

She gave her patient a slightly sympathetic look and pulled out her wand and touched its tip to the thumb Sydney reluctantly offered her. She muttered a spell and the vial she was holding instantly filled with crimson blood. Sydney quickly withdrew her hand, and shook it out.

"All done. Can I get you anything?"

"No, unless you know of another method of entertainment besides damn magazines and food!" Madam Pomfrey gave her a reproving look for swearing, but dismissed it as the moodiness allowed of someone who had been bedridden for too long. As an afterthought Sydney added, "Or you could always let me out of this place." She grinned pleadingly.

"I'm afraid I don't think I'll be of much help to you in either area. I have some paperwork to finish, if you need anything I'll be in my office." Sydney simply nodded in response. She grabbed another magazine off the table and tried to find a good article, but was severely disappointed.

"Honestly, like we care if Jennifer Clark is having an affair with Tom Whaley. I don't understand how people enjoy this crap. Do they really not have a life to the extent that they care about the scandals of random famous people they don't know?"

Someone spoke from behind her. She stiffened with surprise and dropped the magazine.

"You know, talking to yourself is the first sign of insanity." _Remus__! _

Another voice interrupted her mental recognition.

"Not that I don't agree with you. The media really is going downhill." She smiled slightly and turned around to greet what she thought was only two of her friends.

"Remus, Lily, how nice of you to…" She trailed off, noticing that there were three more people then she had presumed. "Oh. The whole gang came."

"Yup," said Sirius beaming. While the others were caught up in conversation, he leaned over to whisper something only she could hear. "Me and Kel need to talk to you. In private." She nodded discreetly, shooting him a questioning look she hoped no one would notice. He cocked his head to the side and raised one eyebrow which managed to get across the message that he would explain later. She gave a shadow of a nod to show that she understood.

* * *

(A/N: earlier that day. Kelly and Sirius, walking over to the hospital wing) 

"Hey Kel wait up." She slowed her pace and allowed him to catch up. "Hey, you know…what we talked about last night." She nodded. He grinned slightly. "Well I was thinking that there are a few more people we..I… I mean, that **I** should talk to. Well, see I was wondering if you wanted to help. You know, you can join Black Detective Agencies." She laughed.

"Sure, I'd love to help."

"Excellent. Let's start with Sydney, since we're going to see her now anyways."

"Yeah but so is everyone else, or do u mean to question her in front of Lily and James?"

"Of course not, my lovely partner in crime. I have no intention of doing that. I simply thought we could use the occasion to arrange a meeting. The question is how and when to do it."

"What do you suggest Detective Black?"

A/N – well, that's all for now. Yes, Sirius reveals his sensitive side once again…or his serious (don't worry, I don't intend on making any of the Sirius/Serious jokes, as they are so old really not funny. I will only make an exception if it really wrks with the story, but I don't plan on it) side…whichever you choose to call it. Oh and I am perfectly aware that this is a dif time period with diff teachers…or at least some. But witches live a long time and I felt like having Pomfrey there. due to having one response to my question regarding the placement of the review responses….and that response saying on the bottom, there they are. If u wan'em at the top..tell me.

Review Responses:

**Madyzcool****: **thnks:) when the time is rite…all will be revealed. Until then, don't die on me. I wudn't dream of killing a reader…I luv getting reviews to much to do that ;)

**Gummy bear:** yes, don't stop reviewing Claire bear. Yea u and Vanessa both reely liked that chap:) im thinking about it, it just depends like if I find a gud spot for him in my story…yea its an idea. Nah, no dumbness. Lurve and miss u too! Kloop u, lol..hehe. l8ta hun.

**xxSpAzZiExx****:** lol..well with that much begging, how cud I refuse. Thnks for the vote, read both fics…see reviews I left.

**LilyFlower1001:** well now u know who it was and how she herd their voice. Thnk u!!

**pInKpIlo6:** wow thnx!!! Lol glad u liked it. No worries, I wont desert ur fic.

**Koalacanan****:** thnks!

**Truegryfinndorgrit****:** yeah, don't wry, id never make lily lik that. O yey more theories..im luvin it! But lik I always say..da lips r zipped. Thnks 4 reviewing!!

**DK Lili:** lol, that's for me to know and you to find out. Thanks!! I kno, im so proud…my first cliffie:)

**GryffindorGoddess28:** lol..wow! reely long. Lol, ill be holding out on you for a bit. Glad u liked it. As for Jordan, gud guesses. Oh and for clarification, james isn't tecniclly in love with lily yet…or at least not consciously or anything, as of now he just reely misses his best frend. U got that rite…u will hav to wait evil grin. I cudnt agree more..hp universe wud b so much better off w/o peter. As for ur theory..lol, wow that is just a tad far-fetched… never fear, im not gonna hold out on u for as long as I will ( I don't exactly kno how long this will b, but when the time feels rite..all shall b revealed) and I dont hav her blamin him for no gud reason….if it makes u feel any better u can take this as a hint. We can only hope this is based on ur sugar high…the horrors if its just the way u r…evil grin again, jk. Long..reely, I hadn't noticed :D but u kno I luv it!! U can never have to long of a review. thnx!

**Nightwanderer****:** lol, thnk u! glad u think its interesting:) thnks again, and of course I will.

**Strangefreaks****: **thnks!! Im flattered…yea Its sooo annoying when people just post without even doing one friggin read over. Yaa, I always read over it a bunch of times myself, plus have at least two friends read it…so you shouldn't find many mistakes on this fic. Thnks for the kind review I tip my hat back to you :)

**Fate's fallen angel: ** wow thnks!! Yea I remember ur fic. Lol..ya course, no one is. im totally flattered, thnks. Lemme know what you think of the other chaps. Thnks again for the reely nice review.

**Smurfinator****:** lol, I like ur sn…the creater of the smurfs lives on my block :) thnks, lol yea join the club, u will find out…..eventually :D

**Jakita****: **well one of your guesses was correct :D. thnks for the review. **_congrats on being my 50th reviewer!!_**

**Gummy bear: **its ok, I understand. Thnks a ton Claire bear!! Lol..o yea, go me!!

**LatentBeauty****:** ur very welcome. Thnks. As for ur question. No she didn't have black hair anymore. Remember, the black dye only lasted for 6 months. Also that the part in italics is something she is remembering, if it makes more sense..u can call it a flashback from her third year. But the story is taking place during her sixth year…she dyed her hair on September first before third year (that's what shes remembering) . So it would be long gone. Make sense?? Sry if this was confusing. I tried to stress the point that time had passed…but thers only so much I could do.

**Amelia Bedelia:** hey, omg thnx for such a nice review!! Yeah they keep getting longer as I get more into it..like this one is even longer then the others. I havn't gotton up to 10 pages yet (I think anyways…i do it in web page format so there are no page breaks) but ill prob get there. Well see I sent out this chapter lik 2 weeks ago… mayb even more and my frend took like forever to get back to me. So it had been preety much done for a while, just waiting on that. I don't normally take this long. Said friend, apologizes personally to you for taking so long. I quote "tell amelia bedelia im very sorry for taking so long shame on me shame on me" Wow thnks, im flattered:D thnks for such a nice (and long!!:) ) review, esp frum such a gud author :D. mucho gratsi! 

**Leo james: ** lol, well I think u found out the answer to that. Will do :D

**Gummy bear: **lol, I did. See her review for proof of this. And don't wry… its no biggie, I know ur really busy and stuff:D luv ya babe!

If anyone thinks they have a funny answer to the quote/question at the beginning of the chap, feel free to share. If I like them… ill post them next chap.

Now all my luvly readers…REVIEW!! Go press the whatever-colored (as always lemme kno if u hav a color to add to the list) button that says 'go' on it and tell me what you think!!


	7. Sleeping Draught

A/N- Hey everyone, here is chapter number 7. I put in what time stuff is happening, pay attention to the times cuz some of it is happening at the same or almost the same time. Also, so you know, I went back and changed it so that Jordan is a year ahead of them… I realized it would work better with everything. For those of you who read my preview I have changed a few things since then in edits, so if you don't find the exact sentence that was there…it's probably there in a slightly different format. One thing I should mention, is that the character Roxy Jones's name was changed to Rochelle Renovo and Carly was changed to Claire. Just so no one is confused. The name Roxy was annoying me and I wanted to change it. And one of my beta's, Claire, requested a character named after her… and when she heard that the spot for resident bitch was open (I wasn't particularly attached to Carly either), she jumped at the chance. But just to say this now: this character is not any reflection on her at all… this Claire is absolutely nothing like the one I know and love (platonically of course, just in case any wierdos decide to ask). And for those of you who thought Jordan had disappeared, you won't get rid of him that easily.

Disclaimer- borrowed (with full intentions of returning, I might add) a few characters, a few ideas, threw in my own useless things and put of the wreckage, this story was born.

**Sleeping Draught**

"Come on guys, we better head down for dinner." James beckoned to the others, who followed him towards the exit, or all but two of them did anyways. "Padfoot? Kelly? You coming?"

"Err…we'll catch up with you lot in a few minutes, just go on down, we'll meet you there." James examined Sirius suspiciously for a second before shrugging and exiting the room.

Sydney looked up at her friends with curiosity, "Well, what did you want to talk about?"

Sirius answered. "Actually, we don't have enough time before Pomfrey there throws us out. But I do know how we can have our little convo without anyone noticing." Sydney gave him a questioning look. He grinned smugly and produced from inside his robes a raggedy package, badly wrapped in brown paper. Sydney slowly pulled the paper off and was utterly bewildered.

"Um Sirius, unless you want me to like check my hair or something, I really don't see how a mirror is going to help us. And, that wouldn't really help us, so… I'm a tad lost." Sirius grinned at her confusion and explained.

"But this isn't just any old mirror. It's a two way mirror. I have the counterpart and all you have to do is say my name into it and our faces will appear into the other's mirror. So tonight we can have our little chat from the comfort of your bed and our… well wherever we find ourselves at the time. Brilliant, I know." He grinned as she smiled with appreciation.

"Much as I hate to admit it, that's actually pretty clever." Sirius beamed.

Kelly, who had said little to nothing thus far, suddenly spoke up in a hurried voice. "Uh, guys, matron alert!"

"Well spotted. Come on, we'd better go," turning to Sydney he lowered his voice, "Tonight, ten o'clock, you call us so we know you're alone. If we don't respond, it means we aren't." She nodded and waved goodbye.

**(****9:50****)**

Lily Evans was utterly bored. She was sprawled out on one of the many couches in the Gryffindor common room, by herself for a change. Kelly and Sirius had disappeared just over ten minutes ago to 'study'. _Study, my ass _she thought to herself with a laugh.Remus and James were off talking on the other end of the common room, and she had absolutely no desire to join **that** conversation. She looked up abruptly as she heard the portrait hole swing open and watched as the rest of her dorm mates began to drift in, one by one. Corbin Deasy entered the room first. She pulled a hair scrunchie off her wrist and tied her dishwater brown hair, which had been highlighted blonde from the sun, into a messy bun. She noticed Lily sitting all alone and walked over, plopping herself onto the couch next to her. Lily gave her the once over and smiled. Corbin was pleasantly predictable, going for comfort rather then fashion, though she occasionally allowed the two to collide. She had an athlete's body from years on the Quidditch team, but did nothing to show it off. She stuck by the firm belief that if people didn't like her simply because she didn't flaunt her body, well then bully for them because she could care less. She was quite a tomboy when it came to sports and could probably beat up half the Gryffindor boys, if she felt so inclined. She didn't **not** like guys either; she just didn't find any point in bothering to spend hours beatifying herself just to impress them. If the guy didn't like her the way she was, then he probably wasn't worth it to begin with. Lily had never been as close with Corbin as she was with Sydney and Kelly, but she was a fun person, and Lily was grateful for the company. Corbin peered over Lily's shoulder to see what she was reading.

"Goblin rebellions, yuck." She scrunched up her freckled nose in mock disgust. Lily cracked a grin. But her happiness dissipated as she noticed who had just entered the common room. _Just my luck _she thought _the devil herself, who uses Claire's body to walk unnoticed amongst the rest of us_. Lily watched with disgust as she brushed her perfectly highlighted hair behind her shoulder and gave a fake, flirtatious laugh at something the boy next to her had just said. She tugged at the edge of her skirt, and with good reason, thought Lily, for the ridiculous piece of clothing barely covered her butt. Close behind Claire, a follower per usual, was yet another life form the girls had the misfortune of sharing their dorm with: Rochelle Renovo, it wasn't that she had a bad personality really, it was more that she lacked one altogether. She had the unfortunate tendency to follow and mimic whoever took her in. She had cut her own caramel colored hair in the same way, adopted the same style of dress… and much to Lily's displeasure, taken up Claire's habit of trash talking anyone who didn't live up to her high standards.

Lily saw the pair heading in her direction, and silently cursed under her breath. Corbin missed the expression on her face and suddenly put a hand to her mouth as she gasped in remembrance and hopped up. Lily caught a brief 'I'll be right back' before she dashed off to the dormitories. Claire leaned over to Rochelle and whispered something and pointed at Lily with a disgusted look on her face. Lily felt a rush of blood stain her cheeks and her body freeze over. But thankfully Rochelle spoke up at that very moment, saving her from possible embarrassment.

"Hey we should go meet Laquisha and the guys now, don't wanna be late." Claire nodded.

With that she turned on her heels and strutted out of the common room, followed closely by Rochelle. Lily looked up abruptly as a high pitched shriek shook her from her hypnotic state. Apparently Claire had not been the only one trying to use the portrait hole. She appeared to have crashed into someone attempting entrance to the room, sending both parties to the ground. Lily smiled as she recognized the other girl who had fallen. If Corbin was the one with the muscles to beat someone up, Jana was the one with the guts to do it… though she usually stuck with a verbal attack, she wasn't afraid to get physical. Jana Knight picked herself up off the ground and burst into laughter when she noticed who she had crashed into. Claire was livid.

"Watch where you're going, freak." Instead of looking remotely worried, Jana rolled her eyes in amusement.

"Why don't you, bimbo?" With that, she turned away to finish her journey into the room. Claire chased after her, determined to have the last word.

"Knight. Get your arse back here. Hey, I said get back! I'm not finished with you." Jana just laughed once again, but obliged. She put one had on her hip and gave her a bored look.

"You rang."

"No need to go all attitude on me, I just wasn't done… chatting. So, how's your day been, freak?" Jana smirked, and casually answered.

"Well I was actually having a lovely time, but then this really hideous girl showed up who was giving off some pretty vile fumes," she waved away an imaginary smell with her hand for effect, "so it kinda ruined my mood, ya know how it is." Claire seemed to be having a delayed reaction. First she gave a haughty grin, and then her eyebrows scrunched together in confusion and then fury as the realization of what Jana had said seemed to finally sink in. The smile slowly melted off her face, leaving a murderous glare in its tracks. Jana smirked, the look on Claire's face was absolutely priceless. Claire's voice dropped to a deadly whisper.

"I'll get you for that Knight. No one talks to me like that and gets away with it. You got that?" Jana remained unfazed by her venomous tone. "Knight, I'm talking to you. No one crosses Claire Gold and gets away with it."

"Oh, I'm scared now. What are you gonna beat me up? Nah, wouldn't wanna break a nail, now would we?" she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "And that third person thing really doesn't work for you." With that, Jana turned away and continued walking in as if nothing had happened.

Claire, realizing she was getting no where and attracting odd stares, gave up, and dragged Rochelle out of the common room. Jana glanced around the room, her eyes landing on Lily.

"Hey girl, what's up? And why are you sitting here all alone anyways?" Lily grinned. Jana was one of the few people who could always manage to bring a genuine smile to her face. Just then, Corbin appeared at the bottom of the steps leading to the girls' dormitories, carrying a thick envelope.

"Hey guys, I gotta go mail this. Almost forgot it was my mum's birthday." She gave a guilty smile, then waved as she walked away. Lily turned to Jana.

"Hey, you were great against Claire." Jana crossed her golden-brown eyes.

"Psh, she's pathetic. Don't let her get to you and stamp all over her inflated ego, those are the two rules of engagement."

Lily giggled, "Good to know." Jana reached into her bag and produced her transfiguration book. She fingered a strand of midnight hair, wrapping a few inches worth of neon pink tips around her finger absentmindedly as she read. Lily smiled, she absolutely loved Jana's hair, even though she would never do something like it to her own.

Ten minutes later Corbin reappeared from the owlery (A/N I think this is the term used in the book, correct me if I'm wrong) and joined her friends on the couch. She looked from one to the other.

"So, wha'd I miss?"

**(9:50)**

James let out a sigh. He and Remus had thoroughly exhausted their conversation topic and fallen silent. He ran a hand through his impossible hair and gave another sigh. His gaze reached out across the common room and landed on a girl. She was lying on her stomach on one of the many couches in the room, her chin supported by two propped up hands. Just sitting there, lost in thought, all alone. _What are you thinking about Lily?_ He surreptitiously watched as Corbin Deasy plopped down on the couch next to her. She brushed aside a curtain of auburn hair and sat up. They chatted for no more then a few minutes before she dashed off. He clenched his teeth as he saw Claire and Rochelle whisper, all the while throwing meaningful glances at the red-head behind them. James could see that she was uncomfortable and knew they were talking about her. Suddenly someone tapped his shoulder and he jolted out of his seat. Remus doubled over in laughter at the sight of his startled friend. James simply rolled his eyes and grinned.

"You back from the twilight zone then?" Another roll of hazel eyes was the only response Remus got. "So, watcha thinking about? Or should I ask who?"

"Nutin and no one."

"Is that so?"

James simply nodded and the two drifted into silence once more. Remus glanced at his friend, deep in thought. _I'll just leave him to it_. James ran a hand through his hair and rested his eyes on Lily, deep in conversation with Jana. His eyes bored into the back of her head, as if searching for the answer to his silent question. _What did I do? _

**(10:02)**

"Sirius? Hey, Siri, you there? Hello?" Voices from inside Sirius' bag began talking. Hurriedly he ducked into an empty classroom, dragging Kelly behind him, and fished around in his bag for a minute before producing a small hand mirror.

"Hey, Syd I'm here," he said, slightly out of breath. Kelly peered over his shoulder, smiling at the sight of her friend's face.

"So, what's this ultra important convo you were so anxious to have about?"

Sirius launched into an explanation, with Kelly interrupting every few minutes to add some detail he had left out. Sydney's reponse was very similar to Kelly's in the fact that she too knew little to nothing that would be helpful.

"Does James know you're doing this?"

"Well… no, actually, he doesn't. But he's my best mate, and I've got to do something to help him out." Sydney nodded and Kelly smiled at this show of loyalty. She was still surprised that the Sirius who constantly joked around and pulled pranks was the same as this one who was fiercely loyal and could be entirely serious when he wanted to. If Sydney shared Kelly's thoughts, she didn't show it and pursued something else she'd been wondering.

"Have you asked Remus about this yet?" Sirius shook his head.

"It's on my to-do list."

"Let's talk to him tomorrow, I'm getting…" she yawned loudly, "very sleepy." Kelly giggled, but agreed wholeheartedly.

"Yeah it's getting pretty late, we should turn in."

"Goodnight, Syd, sleep well and get better soon." Then Kelly handed the mirror to Sirius to say goodbye.

"Night, Syd. Same time tomorrow?" She nodded her assent, then Sirius broke the separation and stowed the mirror back in his bag. He pulled out James' invisibility cloak, which he had borrowed without permission earlier that evening, and threw it over Kelly and himself.

**(11:45)**

_Everything was black, empty as a starless night. The air was damp and earthy smelling._

Kelly carefully tip-toed up the stairs to the girl's dormitories, praying she didn't wake anyone. As she neared the entrance to her own, she thought she caught wisps of noise. She slowly creaked the door open and more clearly made out the muffled sounds of someone moving in their sleep. Squinting, her eyes having difficulty penetrating the darkness, she tried to find the source of the noise.

_She took a step and heard a squelching noise as she dragged her feet through six inches of water. The ground inclined slightly, and the presence of water under feet soon disappeared. Suddenly dim lights appeared all around her, and there were people too._

"Lumos," she whispered, praying the thin beam of light didn't go through the drapes around each bed and wake the whole dorm. As she walked along the row of beds, she examined each one for movement. She approached Lily's bed with caution as she saw the curtains shiver ever now and then. She drew them back and peered over to look at her friend. Her face was ashen and shimmering with a layer of cold sweat. Every few seconds she murmured, and shifted position abruptly. Kelly watched with a sort of fascinated horror as her movements became more violent and her words louder and clearer.

_A cold voice could be heard from under the black cloak of its owner. Somewhere deep in her subconscious she began recognizing the situation. She knew that voice, this place, she'd been here before… and she knew what was about to happen. She knew, but was helpless to stop it. _

"No, no don't." Lily reached a hand out into the darkness. Kelly flinched, and stepped back a few inches.

_"Step aside and your life will be spared."_

"Lily? Lily wake up." Kelly's voice became urgent and panicky. She shook her friend hard by the shoulders, but only succeeded in further tousling her now tangled red hair.

_"No!"_

_"Don't be foolish, child. It's not you we want, step aside."_

"Lily, you're starting to scare me."

_"Never!"_

_Cruel, haughty laughter pierced the darkness and a palpable sense of foreboding came over her._

"No!" She with that single, terror-filled syllable, her eyes snapped open with the force of a gunshot. She blinked a few times, trying to bring the world into focus. "Kelly?" Kelly simply nodded, still feeling rather shaken. "I, Kelly, what… what happened?" Lily took a few deep breaths, trying to slow her racing heartbeat.

"You-you… I'm not really sure what happened. I just walked in and you were thrashing around and talking in your sleep." Lily inhaled a quick breath and her eyes widened slightly. "I tried to wake you up, but you wouldn't snap out of it. It was kinda freaky actually. Are you alright?"

"I-I don't know." She put a hand to her hot forehead and rubbed it, as if still trying to clear the visions of her dream from her mind.

"Um, Lil? What exactly were you dreaming about?" She gave her friend a sympathetic, yet questioning look.

"It was… just a nightmare." Kelly's sixth sense told her there was more to it then that, but could also tell her friend didn't want to talk about it.

"Do you want to go to the hospital wing?" Lily cringed. "I know you hate going there, but look, we'll just grab you a quick potion or something. Just let her look you over. You look positively gray. Come on, do it for me." She put on her best puppy-dog face. Lily felt too shaken and weak to argue, so she gave a half laugh and grudgingly agreed.

"What are you two doing here? It's the middle of the night for heaven's sake, you know that's way past visiting hours," Madam Pomfrey tutted, shaking her head. Kelly rolled her eyes.

"Amazing as it may seem, we too have the ability to get sick as well." The matron's expression softened slightly.

"Well then, come on in. Tell me what's wrong and I'll take a look." She beckoned Kelly into the main rooms.

"Oh no, it's not me. Lily's the one who's sick."

"Well then why didn't you say so? Come with me you two."

"You were having a dream, you say? You wouldn't remember what it was about, now would you?"

"Afraid not," Lily lied, biting her lip, a gesture that failed to go unnoticed by Kelly. _I'm going to get the real story on this someday. But why doesn't she trust me? Usually we tell each other this kind of thing._ A moan of floorboards shifting under new weight came from the back of the examination room.

"Lily?" Her auburn hair whipped through the air as she spun her head around to face the owner of the voice.

"Syd!" She made to run towards her friend, but was restrained by the matron.

"Ms. Schwartz!" She said in a stern, authoritive, and slightly scandalized tone. "What are you doing out of bed? I told you just this afternoon; you cannot just go traipsing around the infirmary as you please. Well, go on, off to bed with you. And don't let me catch you out of bed again young lady." Sydney scowled but obediently turned around and followed the hallways out of sight.

"Now, Ms. Evans, it looks as though you've run a bit of a fever. Take this cooling draught now, and… yes I think that would be best… a potion for dreamless sleep when you return to your dormitory." Lily nodded and downed the clear-blue liquid. She shuddered slightly as a cold shiver ran down her spine, but felt her abnormally high body heat relaxing to its normal intensity. She tucked a clear vial containing a few swallows worth of an opaque, deep red potion into her robes, to take once she returned to the tower.

Lily and Kelly entered the empty common room well past midnight and both were terribly exhausted. Lily uncorked her potion and downed the lot in one go. Her eyelids fluttered a few times and, without warning, she collapsed onto the floor.

"Lily!" Kelly cried out in horror. But one look at her evenly rising chest, she realized that she had simply fallen asleep. _No wonder Pomfrey told her to take it once she got to the dormitory. _Kelly tried to lift her, but got no more then a few steps before her knees buckled under the dead weight.

"Damn girl, you need to start taking off some pounds." She smiled for a second as she imagined her friend's protests if she'd been awake to hear the comment. She circled Lily once, trying to come up with a solution to her dilemma. _What would Lily do if the situation were reversed? Hmm…of course!! All I need to do is use a levitation charm and she'll be…_ the happy expression was suddenly wiped of Kelly's face._ Except I'm not Lily and the top of our charms class. It's one of my worst subjects. Aw fuck, I'm doomed. Or rather Lily would be. If I floated her up that skinny, tightly wound spiral staircase, she'd be covered with bruises._

"Something wrong?" Kelly spun on her heels and spotted a figure stepping off the staircase to the boy's dormitories.

"Jordan! Thank god." She breathed a sigh of relief. He walked over and looked down at Lily, peacefully sleeping on the floor, with curiosity.

"What happened to her?"

"Sleeping draught."

"I see. You need some help there?"

"Would you?" She gave him a grateful look.

"Yeah sure, you want her back in the dormitory I'm guessing?" Kelly nodded and gave him a warm smile. "Sure thing." Jordan stood at the bottom of the girl's staircase, floating Lily up the stairs. Kelly followed closely behind, spotting Lily in case the fact that Jordan couldn't see what he was doing caused him to steer her wrong. Kelly lifted her into bed and then, after making sure she was comfortable, hurried downstairs to tell Jordan they had succeeded.

"Hey Jordan, yeah it worked out just perfectly, she didn't wake up or get hit or anything," then as an afterthought she added with a grin, "Though it would probably take a lot more then that to break that drugged stupor she was in." Jordan laughed and smiled at her. He turned to go back to bed, but she stopped him. "And Jordan, thanks."

"Anytime." He grinned at her and then, with a wave, departed up the stairs. _Who knew he was so nice? I guess maybe I was wrong about him._

A/N 2—sorry if I was like introducing too many characters in too short a period of time there… but I felt like I had to get them in there soon before were at like chapter 20 and I introduce them and people are like wut the hell, since when did she had dorm mates. Also, hope this wasn't too choppy of a chapter… let me know in your review if you think it was, or if it was fine; for future reference. And I promise to do my absolute best not to make Claire you're classic cliché (since you all know how much I try not to make this cliché and the same as most of what's out there) blonde bitchy girl. And no Rochelle is not just a pointless character for the sole purpose of having another blonde bitch (even though she's not blonde...but you know wut I mean) I have a total plan for her.

If anyone is ever wondering why a chap is late coming out or how far along I am on it, check my profile under 'story status' I update on their a lot, so it's pretty reliable.

!!!!!!!!!Notice to all!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This summer I am going away to sleep away camp for 5 weeks, that means no computer, no writing, and no updates (though I fully intend to bring a notepad to jot down any ideas I might have). I'm leaving on July 11th and will return on August 13th. This is just so you all know that while I'm away, I won't be updating of making any progress on this story until I come back. Please don't leave me or my story because I promise we will be back in business when I return, I even have a good chunk of the first draft of chapter 8 written.

!!!!!!!!Another notice!!!!!!!!

I need a beta for this story. Not to offend of discredit any of my current ones but I'd like someone who actually does has beta experience and that I can rely on for each chapter … as opposed to just on my friends who happen to like this enough to make corrections. So if you are willing to do this, then please let me know in a review or an email. Include the following:

Your email address and sn on AIM or MSN messenger (if you have either).

Your Pen name on ffnet and/or whatever name you wish to be called

List any prior experience you have, and if you wish, links to the stories you've edited or written. Also if you wanna write what your strengths and weaknesses are… or anything else to convince me you're good at editing.

Things to look forward to next chapter (I've written about six pages as of now, so only that and what's in my mind):

We meet Regulus Black

Peter Pettigrew becomes a part of the story (due to the pleads of certain reviewers and friends of mine cough Claire cough) hopefully you'll find my excuse for his absence plausible enough.

Sydney is finally released from the infirmary

The 'detectives' talk with Remus and he points out something important to them

Lily thanks Jordan for helping her out

Review Responses:

**Truegryfinndorgrit****:** lol, go to sleep! I must say im pretty impressed, I got this review not five minutes after posting. Wow thnx, im flattered!

**Nightwanderer****:** hes an old softie..its sirius, wut do u expect :D. well… its not exactly matchmaker yet…more like friendmaker. Thnx!

**Amelia Bedelia:** im so serious, lik that thing I put in quotes…was a copy paste frum wut she said. She said that she was reading the reviews for my story..and yea. Yeah that sounds like a pretty gud length for now…this ones longer. Lik I said, it'll prob keep getting longer and longer. Not long?? Trust me that is long! Thnks I was just lik typing and it came to me and I was lik omg I hav to put that. I know, Sirius is so flexible…that's y we all love him! Thnks again for the uber nice review. L8ers. Oh and update 'Light' asap… its such a good story!!!

**Joypirate****:** wow thnx! :D will

**MiaaMiaFit9:** lol, thnks… and of course I will/did.

**GryffindorGoddess28:** lol, thnks. Yes well u'll see…ther recruiting other members. Phew, no sugar!! jumps for joy…jk jk. I don't remember what you said off the top of my head, but I assure u it was very VERY far fetched. I know you do:D that's why im evil… and my evil sadistic mind takes great pleasure in flaunting my superior knowledge of wut happened. It is rather kool tho, im the one person on the whole planet who knows… I haven't even told my beta's, tho im considering it. O and I am afraid, have no fear of that. lol. Thnks for the fab review!

**Gummybear****:** I know, that's soo annoying!! I figured that was why you said that, and if you look at her review response…I told her that u did indeed address her personally. Oh yeah!! Power to da POP baby! Yeah I have hw to be getting to as well…damn Stivers and her Giver project! Well by the time you read this you'll have obviously read the next chapter, but rite now when im typing this…I have lik a few paragraphs down… and a sorta mental layout. Im just really really busy rite now. L8er hun! Ps- can't WAIT till camp!!

**PsYcHo****-Me:** lol, yes its true…tragic, I know….only six, well seven now. I know, I was soo annoyed!!! Damn u quick-edit shakes fist at the computer that suks, it doesn't bold mine, just takes away any asterisks and squigglys :(. Wow thnx, so glad you like it :D. yellow & green & purple lol…awesome… ive heard green, but yellow is another color to add to the ever-lengthening list. And yes, well spotted. You DO not know what is wrong with Sydney yet. You will tho…eventually :D. Australia? Sweet!! I live in California (USA). Exactly, I would be so pissed if someone dragged me up at 3 in the morning or whatever. Esp if I was as anti morning as Kelly is :D. waves back In case you didn't figure it out, I answered ur reviews in reverse order of the chapters (6,5,4,3,2)…or in other words, in the order they turned up in my inbox. Thnx for reviewing almost EVERY chapter… mucho gratsi! ttly.

**Lucky-Racer:** wow thnx for reviewing every chap!! Yea i wasn't sure if other people used that or if it was just like cali-speak… hence why I clarified the meaning. Yeah that thing in chap 2 is very loosely based on something I did once, well basically just the idea… I dunno, it is kinda cool to see what people say about you 'behind your back'. Glad I'm making you so curious, that's kinda the point evil grin. The whole peter thing is kinda a debate im goin through right now. It's just cuz I hate him so much, but he was most likely a good person before he went bad… but it's hard to portray him in a way that's realistic. I haven't found any stories that manage to capture that character completely, usually he's just kinda there without ever doing or saying anything of importance. I think I just might leave him out or this one cause I really don't think I can do him justice. Thnks so much for pointing out the typo, always glad for the help… I'll go change that now. You'll find out why James doesn't like Jordan and as for why he just started hanging with them… well it was one of those they already knew who he was, had a few classes together but weren't really friends much kinda thing. You'll also find out why she never told anyone. As for the clothing issue… but it was kinda like they put one jeans and a tank in the morning, hang around in the common room for a bit, then just before leaving they would pull on robes over…that was kinda wat I envisioned. And I might add that in the books I think they mention in a few places like wearing muggle clothes under their robes, plus the books never mention a uniform besides black robes, I think that's just something the movie decided to do. Whatever, either way, in my little harry potter world they can wear whatever they want under their robes. Sorry if that was confusing. Oh you'll find out… eventually grins evilly again. Thnks for the inspiration, always appreciated. Thnks for reviewing… and so many times as well! throws you a bouquet of roses.

**Ruth3:** thnx, and I try my best. Lol, well one can only hope...I mean they DO get married :D but yea, totally agree. And I have no idea why ffnet won't let you post asterisks anymore, but its VERY annoying!

**Gummybear****:** lol, sorry… but it just occurred to me one night so I whipped it together… besides, you weren't online at the time.

**Sexy peeves:** lol, nice penname:D thnk you so much:) I look forward to hearing your feedback on it!

**Lucky-Racer(responding to preview review cuz otherwise the other one wud be WAY too long and confusing):** lol, glad you're so enthusiastic. Well pretty much all of your questions were answered in this chap. Lol, no Jana is not a house elf… that made me laugh…and Knight is her last name. Roxy is also a nickname for Roxanne… I know someone with this name, so trust me, it's true. But that name was annoying me so I changed her name. You were right about the mirrors, good job! As for the color, I don't think it necessarily changes for one person, some people just always have one color and others always have a different one…though I couldn't tell you for sure….anyhoos, doesn't really matter. Yes that was rather the point of the preview, to provoke questions:D im evil like that. (just imagine there's an askrisk here, damn u quickedit) receives inspiration.

**Quacjen****:** Thank You!

**Nightwanderer****:** Thank you! Lol, yes that's very good encouragment:D aww thnx, im so glad you like it! Yea I tried to pick parts of this chap that would arouse questions… and from the responses I got, seems like it worked pretty well. Thnks for the inspiration, ill take all I can get.

Now go press the purple, blue, green, yellow, gray, or (my personal favorite) orange and green striped button that says go on it and tell me what ya think (and soon so I can read it before I leave). Although I have major doubts as to the truthfulness of that color, it gave me a good laugh. It's submitter requested a special mention, and I am more then willing to comply, so this chapters funky color is courtesy of PsYcHo-Me. :D I was wondering…. Purely of curiosity, are there any boys reading this fic? Just cuz seems to me that this wudn't b the type of thing a guy wud like (not to generalize or b sexist of anything, cuz im not… I just wanna see if im wrong on this one) so if any of you readers are guys out there… say so in your review, cuz im curious. Now REVIEW cuz I luv ya all!!!!!


	8. Endless Fridays

A/N- Okay Okay, now before you lead me up to the guillotine.. let me at least make a feeble attempt at explaining my ridiculously long absence. The first 5 weeks I was, of course, at camp, as anyone who reads my AN's or profile would know. When I got back, I did work on it some… but I then hit an extreme case of writer's block, and that coupled with starting up at a new school (and just school in general) … along with soccer and dance and.. godforbid.. a social life…I was quite delayed in my writing. However, I finally sat down and finished off this chapter and sent it off to my betas.. well two of them anyways. I sincerely hope I have not been deserted by my readers, and I would like to thank those of you loyal enough to stick with me and my fic. I am not overly fond of this chapter, probably because of the writer's block.. however, I hope that the rest of you like it more then I do.

Due to the pleads of certain reviewers I have decided to put Peter into my fic. I sincerely apologize if his excuse for absence seems a bit unrealistic or if you just hate it for other reasons. But hopefully it will work well enough for you, plus I have already started mentally weaving him into the story. I also apologize if my portrayal of him seems unreal or just bad characterization. But like I mentioned earlier, I really haven't read any stories where I was completely satisfied with him, though some people came close. So hopefully he will at least come off as acceptable.

I would like to thank my two wonderful beta's for this chapter, Claire and Amelia Bedelia, for giving me so much fabo feedback and being so nice and efficient about it. _tosses bouquets of roses to both_

Disclaimer: Okay fine, he's not mine…happy?

(all credit goes to JKR)

Now, onto the chapter you've been waiting months (woah, its been that long hasn't it?) to receive.

**Endless Fridays**

She felt her shoulders being gently shaken, the motion pulling her into consciousness. She let out a groan of protest, and swatted a hand feebly at the form shaking her.

"Come on, up with you." The sleeping form simply groaned again. "Come on, I know the medicine makes you drowsy, but if you would just get up long enough to swallow this…" Madam Pomfrey shook the girl more vigorously this time, but with similar results. "Now really, this is getting ridiculous. Ms. Schwartz, it is time to take your morning potion, and if we don't get this into your system in the next ten minutes it will delay your release, and I **know** how much you want to leave."

Sydney gave a long sigh and grudgingly pushed the covers down a bit, pulling herself into a sitting position. Madam Pomfrey gave a slight smile and bustled off to fetch the potion. Sydney yawned and retrieved a brush from the bedside table. Pomfrey returned and handed over the vial of clear green solution. Sydney downed it in one go, then, gagging, hurriedly snatched up her water glass and chugged half the contents.

"Blech, disgusting." She made a face, and then redirected her gaze up to the matron. "Do you know how long I'll have to keep taking this stuff?"

"I'm not sure right now. Your physical condition has improved greatly. If it continues at this rate you very well might be out of here quite soon." At these words, Sydney's face broke into a huge grin. "However," she continued, "you might have to still take your potions after you leave… to keep your condition stable." Sydney frowned a bit at this, feeling a tad deflated. However, her mood couldn't be completely dampened.

"Well, do you think you could maybe make it bit more appetizing?"

"I don't have anything in my stores that would work as well, and doing charms on healing potions is risky business and can easily weaken them, but I'll look into it." Sydney gave a silent nod and watched as the matron departed from the room.

She longed to get out of there. She felt fine nearly all of the time and was only plagued now by utter boredom. Oh sure, she wasn't in total isolation; people visited, and there were, of course, other patients. However, she really preferred when the room was devoid of other invalids, for those she had shared it with thus far had been no one she knew very well or even at all. Mainly lower classmen that tended to whine a lot, usually to her since there was no one else for conversation. She felt as though she was in a prison, and even though she got news of the outside world, it was merely a source with which to torture her: seeing all the fun she was missing out on. And it wasn't even as if she got the time off from her studies. No, she had to do just as much homework as everyone else. More actually, for she had to make up for the content of the classes she had missed.

She looked up abruptly as the door opened. Madam Pomfrey ushered two students in, a boy and a girl. The boy had slightly mussed, dark brown hair, a smug expression on his face and looked to be in about his fourth year. His left arm was done up in bandages, but his injuries looked minimal. Sydney guessed he would probably be in and out within an hour or two; she had become quite accurate in estimating the length of a stay. The girl seemed to have sustained more damage then the boy. Her pale hair was matted with blood on one side and she had an obvious limp. Pomfrey settled them in on either side of Sydney.

"Ms. Schwartz," Sydney looked up curiously, "these two were found in the middle of a muggle fist fight, please make sure that they do not continue where they left off. Use magic, if need be." She turned, eyeing both students, and continued, now addressing them. "If I find any violence in this room you can be sure the offending parties will be heavily punished. This is a place of healing, **not** destruction."

* * *

Sydney looked from one side of her to the other. She idly twiddled her thumbs, attempting to search for something to fill the uncomfortable silence. "What were you guys fighting about anyways?" The boy scowled and remained silent, but the girl spoke up.

"He started it. I was just minding my own business and this one comes up insulting my family." The girl paused for breath, hear rising up her face. "So, I may have said a few things back… and then he attacked me." She gave Sydney a nervous look, "Honestly, it wasn't anything near as bad as what he said."

Sydney laughed, "Calm down, I'm not gonna accuse you or anything. Him on the other hand…"

"Filthy little Mudblood, deserved what she got," the boy muttered. The girl swallowed rather loudly. She gnawed the inside of her lip and turned her eyes to the floor. Sydney glared daggers at him; she'd had a personal vendetta against the term since befriending Lily in first year.

"Oy! None of that." The boy didn't seem remotely worried.

"You can't control me, you've got no authority over me," he said confidently.

"Authority, no. Extensive knowledge of hexes, yes. And don't think I wouldn't, because I'd have absolutely no guilt in cursing you, none whatsoever." The boy looked frightened for a split second before covering it up with a nonchalant façade.

"I'm not afraid of you. We both heard Pomfrey; you'd get in trouble if you even **touched** me." Sydney found his cockiness extremely irritating.

"Now this, is where I think you'll find you're wrong. You see, she gave me permission to use magic to keep you two from getting physical. This may only be a verbal confrontation, but then again, the story she hears just might be a bit, **altered**, shall we say. So I suggest you shut your trap and stay that way unless you want to be extending your little visit here." Regulus scowled even more, but thought better of speaking up. The girl gave her an appreciative grin. _Poor kid, she got beat up pretty bad too_. She supposed she might be taking a bit of her pent up frustration out on this boy, but it was only seeing that he actually got what he deserved,_ and I'll eat my own foot if I'd let someone be that cruel and get away with it._

* * *

"Lily." A soft voice slowly pulled her out of a deep sleep. She moaned softly and rubbed both eyes with balled up hands. She squinted to make out the form above her.

"Morning, Jana," she said with slight confusion. Jana answered her questioning glance immediately.

"Kelly asked me to wake you up, something about visiting Sydney before breakfast."

"Oh yeah, thanks, Jana."

"Anytime – but I'd hurry up and get dressed… you've got about three minutes 'till Kelly said you were leaving."

Lily's eyes shifted to the clock, confirming Jana's statement. She cursed under her breath, dragged herself out of the warm bed, and yanked on the first decent clothes she could find. She ran down the stairs with her robes half on, only stopping to get her arm through the second sleeve when she entered the common room. She pulled a brush through her hair as she scanned the room for her friends; she spotted Kelly in a corner near the portrait hole, talking with Remus, Sirius, James, and _no, it couldn't be… could it?? _Peter. Oh sure, she knew the four boys were close friends, but Peter had been missing since the beginning of the school year. Kelly beckoned her over and she reluctantly joined the group.

"Hey guys… hey Peter, when did you come back? And where have you been, anyways?"

"Hey Lil, sleep well?" Kelly said, moving to make room for Lily to join their circle. "And Peter was just about to inform the rest of us about his mysterious absence." She grinned at her friend, then looked expectantly at Peter. He fidgeted under their stare, downright nervous at having so many eyes fixated on him.

"Oh well, you see my family moved to Bulgaria f-for dad's work. And so they put me in D-Durmstrang. So that's were I've been."

Remus grinned at him, "Good to have you back, Pete. But, if you mind me asking, why **did** you come back?"

"Oh, well they decided that they'd rather have dad working in Britain, and they put some mu-muggleborn wizard on the job instead. They decided that he-they needed s-someone who knew the country better, or something like that." The boy silently pleaded with them not to question him any further. Lily got the distinct impression that he wasn't used to so much attention and rather disliked the change. She looked down at the diminutive figure in front of her, he seemed different somehow. Not his looks, for besides a few more inches of mousy hair a few shades darker then Remus', they remained unchanged. It was something more subtle then that. He had always been the skittish type, and maybe it was just the pressure of everyone paying close attention to him that made him seem signifigantly more nervous and edgy then normal. After all, he had been at Durmstrang; that couldn't do good things for someone as socially introverted as him. Kelly's voice shook her from her musings.

"Come on, we had better get a move on. Oh Peter, we're going to visit Sydney in the hospital, you wanna come?"

"She's sick?"

"Uh huh."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"With what?" Kelly let out a small sigh as he picked up his old habit of asking too many questions – usually the ones people didn't know or want to answer.

"Oh, Lil, I should probably tell you… do you remember where you fell asleep last night? I mean the second time."

"In my be… or did I?" She bit her lip for a second, trying to remember.

"Common room ringing any bells?" Her eyes widened.

"I fell asleep in the… but then how come I woke up in my bed?"

"Yeah, that was the thing I figured I should tell you. You see, after you took that sleeping potion in the common room, rather stupidly I might add –"

"Hey! I didn't know it would kick in so fast," she protested.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Anyways, I tried to lift you, but you're damn heavy when you're asleep." Lily scowled, but kept quiet, curious as to where this was going. "And you know how terrible my charms are, so I didn't even try that one. Then Jordan turned up and floated you to your room. So you might wanna go find him today and say thanks, since, without him you'd have spent the night on the floor. And he was downright nice about it too," she lowered her voice, and added, almost to herself, "guess I was wrong about him." But James heard her, _if only you knew how wrong you are. You got sucked right into that act of his. _

* * *

"Hey guys! Great to see you. And Lil, are you okay? I never got a chance to ask what was wrong when you were up here."

"Hey, Syd, I'm fine. Just ran a bit of a fever. Kelly dragged me up here, you know how maternal she can get." Sydney laughed as Kelly scowled. Sirius suddenly noticed who was occupying the bed next to Sydney's.

The boy's face peeled into a grin. "Hey there, Bro."

Sirius glared at him. He seemed to be straining himself to remain calm. "Hello, Regulus." Sydney's face spelled out complete shock that this brat was related to one of her closest friends.

James put a sympathetic hand on his shoulder. He whispered so that only he could hear. "Come on, just ignore him. We'll talk to them about it later, don't worry about it, they're just surprised." Sirius gave a faint nod. He was spared further conversation with his sibling by Madam Pomfrey approaching the group.

She halted at the foot of Sydney's bed with a genuine smile on her face. "I just finished going over your charts, and have decided it's high time we put you back in school."

"Yes!" Sydney looked just about ready to hug the matron, but restrained. "When can I leave?"

"Always the overeager one," she said, smiling slightly. "Assuming your condition remains stable throughout the day, you should be joining your peers at around dinner time. Just make sure that you use this weekend to catch up on any homework you've neglected, because you're teachers will be expecting you to be completely up to date in their classes."

"Ok." This didn't bother her in the slightest, for being in such a state of complete boredom, she had finished her schoolwork more efficiently then she normally did.

"Also, you'll still need to take all your potions, and don't go on with all this about how much hate them, I'm well aware… but your health is more important then your comfort." Sydney cursed under her breath, but the child-like grin soon returned to her face, for nothing could crush the excitement brought on by the news of her release.

* * *

Friday's always seem to drag on forever. Each class seems hours long, the teachers all seem to be droning on in monotonous tones, and the last class teacher always finds a reason to keep everyone after for at least five minutes. It seems as if everyone is trying to hold back the weekend from coming as long as humanly possible. This particular Friday was no exception. In fact, what with Sydney's impending return to school and the constant berating on the reasons behind Peter's absence… which ended up having to be answered by the other members of the Marauders, since he seemed quite terrified by all the attention and downright refused to repeat his tale… the day dragged on at a snails pace. As for Sydney, shut up in a room more or less alone (Regulus and the girl had departed long since) and with no classes to distract her, the day stretched on ten times more slowly then for her friends. Needless to say, by the time classes were nearing their finish… the entire population of Hogwarts was more then ready for the weekend and a little relaxation.

Lily's eyes glanced down at her wrist for the twelfth time to find that Transfiguration had yet to end. She began to tap her nail on the edge of her desk in boredom. The tiny, black hand inched its way through molasses, counting down the minutes.

_5_

Lily looked over at Kelly and caught her eye. Kelly pointed to Lily's watch and raised her eyes in question.

_4_

Lily held up four fingers under her desk, Kelly nodded.

_3_

A hard object collided with her shoulder. Lily spun her head and glared at Sirius, then bent over and tossed the red eraser back onto his desk.

_2_

She quickly scribbled the homework assignment at the bottom of her notes and began throwing things into her bag. Sirius was slowly inching his chair away from his desk.

_1_

Sirius exploded out of his chair, determined to be the first one out the door. Lily hopped up and followed at a much more reasonable pace.

* * *

Sydney carefully packed three overlarge bottles into a canvas bag and stuffed a grey sweatshirt in over them.

"I'm going – bye," she called out towards a polished wooden door with the inscription 'M. Pomfrey' carved into it, which had been left a few inches open. She swung the bag over her shoulder and breathed out a contented sigh as she walked out the door and back into the world of Hogwarts, just as she'd been itching to do for so long now. The hallways were conspicuously deserted. _Everyone must be at dinner._

She stepped into the Gryffindor common room and breathed out another happy sigh. She half-jogged up the narrow staircase and let her bag drop onto the blue comforter. She dragged a brush through her hair a few times and then discarded it onto the mattress as well. She considered putting on a sweatshirt for a minute before trashing the idea and heading down for dinner.

She pushed one of the huge oak doors open a crack and peered in. She gulped and slowly opened it just enough to squeeze through, praying that no one noticed her late entrance. She released the door and it shut with a loud, echoing, thud. Groaning slightly, she shuddered as every pair of eyes in the room turned her way. She swallowed, feeling suddenly self conscious and awkward. Sydney took in a deep breath and strained her eyes to find her friends. She spotted a flash of red hair and sighed with relief. Walking as fast as she could without appearing to be running, she quickly joined them. Lily and Kelly both jumped up to give her hugs. She spotted the boys sitting a few yards down the table; James and Remus both flashed her grins and Sirius gave her the thumbs up sign. Peter was immersed in separating a loose thread on his robes from the fabric and failed to notice her entrance.

"It's great to have you all better and back in school." Lily grinned at her friend. Sydney bit her lip for a second but quickly stopped when she became conscious she was doing it.

"Yeah, it's great to be back." She smiled at Lily.

* * *

"Ow! Sirius, that was my foot!"

"Oops, sorry Kel."

"Shh!! Both of you… you're gonna get us caught!"

"Sorry, Rem."

"Just be quiet!"

"Sorry!"

"He said to be quiet, you idiot."

"Hey! You just talked too, hypocrite!"

"Gahh! Impossible."

Whispers traveled up the empty hallway and finally subsided in front of a door which began to slowly swing open, seemingly on it's on. The door was closed just as softly and four people materialized in the room.

"I swear to god, that is the **last** time I ever bring you anywhere under that cloak," Remus said in an annoyed voice to Kelly, who immediately objected.

"Hey! Sirius was doing most of it."

"True, but he's better when you're not around… and I can't exactly kick him out of the Marauders, now, can I?"

Kelly glared from one to the other. "You both suck."

Sirius laughed, "Oh, you sure told us." He laughed again. Big mistake. Sydney picked up on this and quickly intervened.

"Come on, kids, if you recall we did actually come here to do something a little more productive than watch those two act like ten year olds… entertaining as it may be." Remus grinned at her.

"So, is someone going to fill me in on this big secret plan you've been keeping from me?"

Sirius jumped up. "See, it's like this…"

* * *

"Wait, so do either James, or more importantly Lily, know you're doing this?"

Sirius answered in an overly sarcastic tone. "Oh yes, Remus, that's it exactly. Lily's in on the whole thing, but she just thought it would be more fun if we had to find it all out then actually tell us… come on man, be smart."

"That's what I feared." Kelly raised a questioning eyebrow at him. Remus continued, "Didn't it occur to any of you that this whole thing is totally breaking Lily's trust by going behind her back and trying to find out things that she has made an obvious effort to keep hidden? And I'm certain she wouldn't want those secrets spilled to someone who, like James, she hates. I mean there must be a **reason **that not one person seems to know. And a **reason **why she dodged Sydney's and Kelly's questions about what was wrong. And maybe even a reason why she died her hair black that summer without any obvious motive. Come on, doesn't it seem like she doesn't **want **us to know? And shouldn't we, as her closest friends, respect that and let it be?" He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, running a shaky hand through his sandy hair. Three silent faces were instantly etched with worry and guilt. When they thought they would be unable to bear the tense atmosphere, Sydney came to the rescue by shattering the silence.

"How stupid are we?"

"Very," said Sirius in total seriousness. "Especially me; I'm the one who thought up the whole goddamn idea in the first place."

Kelly gave him a soft look. "Don't be so hard on yourself; you're no more guilty then the rest of us. All of us should have thought of it, and all of us failed to do so."

"So," said Sydney, "what do we do?"

"I don't think the idea is a total waste," stated Remus confidently.

"But you just said…"

"I said we shouldn't do it the way you planned to; I never said to trash the entire thing. What I propose, is that we forget finding out what happened, and try to get Lily and James to at least talk about it."

Sydney grinned, "I like the way you think. If we could just convince her to hear him out, or to get them both to tell us what happened and see if there isn't something we can do to rectify the situation… it would do just as much and not hurt in the slightest."

Remus grinned back, "Exactly."

A/N-

----Well, I got my 100th review on this chapter!! Which rather ironically, was sent by none other then one of my main beta's, Claire. So special recognition goes to the one under the alias "gummybear". ----

Review Responses: to all those amazing people who take the time to tell me what they think, you have no idea how much I appreciate it…which is why, unlike many authors, I always respond to every single one, no matter how little was said… because you took the time to send me your thoughts, so im taking the time to give you mine.

**Zayne: **thanks for being the first person to review chap 7:D I'd love to hear your theory, and will probably email you before you read this (since I write these as soon as I get the review) however, I cannot tell you if your correct… somehow its more fun when you can keep guessing but never know for sure until its revealed. I'm a great fan of theories though, absolutely luv to hear them. O yes, cliffies are evil as the reader, but completely entertaining when you're the writer. esp since ur the only one who knows wuts gonna happen. Sounds like your birthday's coming up then…so happy (im guessing 13th, since that's the age you become a teen, correct me if im wrong) birthday!!!!

**Amelia Bedelia: **I know, im so proud:D and I plan to make 8 just as long, or more… or less too I suppose…..ya never know. I've got about 6 pages so far tho. Thnx! Im so glad u like it. Yeah, I considered havin syd give something, but decided against it. Remus will defiantly make a few good points, tho they mite not b wut u thought or wanted. I'm still actually debating exactly wut to hav him say…or I kno one thing, but not sure I Ishud put more. Wow, very good theory… fraid I can't say if its rite, wrong, close, or totally off course. So glad you're gonna be my beta!!!! You said you usually don't offer to beta, so I'm honored. Your soap opera sounds really great! And no, not boring at all! I'd luv to read it…but that's okay, but if u want, lemme know how its going, and wut happening to the peoples… id luv to hear. As for doing one with my friends, I dunno if I'd be able to recruit anyone, don't think many of my friends are that into writing. Well, ill just remind you a lot or whatever… as long as that doesn't like annoy you. Thnks so much for the nice… and very long (but I LUV long) review. **Added later:** hey thanks so much for doing all the corrections, and in one night..im quite impressed:D thanks for being so efficient and supportive! --Till 9

**Gummybear** yey thnks!!!! I fixed the carly/Claire thingy, thnks for pointing it out. Think I found a good beta, and of COURSE you can still read it over, I like having a couple diff people reading it over. Wud never kick you off the staff darling. Can't wait to see you at camp (tho when u read this it'll b after.. but w/e. luv ya!

**Sarah Embry: **thanks, and I, of course, intend to.

**QueenofDrama** thank you! Lol, yeah well you'll find out wuts fueling the anger later;) yeah, I was really curious bout the guy thing..no ones responded as of yet tho :( I wouldn't dream of not updateing, so here u go:D

**Nightwanderer**thanks!!! yeah I really liked the dream idea when it came to me, and I think it turned out gud. And that you even found it scary… ill take that as a compliment:D I had an awesome time at camp… but now im back and heres some more:D

**Lucky-Racer:** I didn't think you were, but I AM curious if there are any reading this at all. Your very welcome for the long reply… you did write such long reviews and so many…and I had a lot to respond to. I KNOW quickedit blows! I know that's wut they used them for..but ya know, maybe they got creative every now and then. Yeah, Pete could prob be portrayed a bunch of ways without being out of canon… hope you like how im doing so far. I agree… that's why im taking her out, she needs to get more involved with the main plot… though the mirrors did that a little bit. Again, can't confirm or deny your theories at this time….just keep'm coming. I had an AWESOME time at camp, the best ever!!! Yeah they can be, I remember when we first got my dog…she was quite a handful. But that's awesome, im sure u'll love your puppy (even if you feel drawn towards hate every now and then). What kind are/did you get? Yes you do spell doughnuts like that..at least that what spell check on here tells me….so yea.

**Rowan the Green Eyed Cat: **thank you so much for the offer to beta for me. I'm afraid that I accepted someone else as a beta before I received this. If I feel that I want another person to read things over… I'll be sure to contact you. If you want any help or advice for starting your story, feel free to email me and ill give you some tips.

**Angelps7:** hey, im glad you like my story! Thank you and I did have fun!!

**Mya** wow, glad you like…all the characters :D thanx so much for the really nice review!! Hope this was soon enough :D

**Chickrule**yea, this site likes to do that every now and again. Now now..if I spoiled the whole plot, where'd the fun in reading it be?? :P im so glad you like it!! Peace.

**Eternamente**hey syd! Lol, well im glad u like my fic, now that u've actually read all of it:D and of course that u lik ur namesake as well:P yeah I know..im so proud of my 96..tho now u've bumped it up to 99..so the next person to review is gonna b the 100th…WOW! Lol, yeah ive switched letters around like that b4 too, hehe…makes u feel lik a real idiot huh? Wut exactly r u writing that u hate? Ur fic?? Im listening to the beatles too…rock on! And it's the weekend..mondo score!!! Even tho it prob won't b when I post this…but oh well, rite now its Friday and I am psyched. Well, see ya at (gag) school.

**Gummybear** lol, yeah that's pretty darn funny that my 100th reviewer is also my friend and beta (don't worry, u still have the job). I miss you too!!! And all my other camp peeps…esp a certain someone whos name just happens to rhyme with mine.. im sure you know who:D hehe. Wait r u doing track or is it just like during PE? That suks! It was funny, I was waiting at the busstop and all these people frum school go running by cuz its hell week for them, haha..poor them. Were guys whistling at you while u were walking back or something?? (sexy Claire..lol..hehe, sry) I know..its so stupid, don't they know how big of a turn off that is. It doesn't make a gurl feel good, it just makes her a little nervous that shes lik about to be raped or something…I mean come on. Toddles dearest…faithful? lol..nice,

**Systamatic**I am fully aware of how long this chapter took to get out..partly since I was at camp for 5 weeks…and then I was suffering from a severe bout of writer's block…or as I like to call it: I was feeling uninspired. I apologize for the wait and thanks so much for the support.

**MaraudersFan**why thank you, im so glad you like it:D well, you shall wait no longer..for there it is.

**Randomfrizzhead** thank you:D here is an update, and I would never dream of deserting this story!!


	9. Musings

**A/N:** Now before you line me up against a wall and yell "shoot", I'd like to at least give a few pleading last words. I am quite aware of how ridiculously long it's been since my last update. I know that many of you had your doubts, thought I had given up on this story. But **oh no**… I am back and kicking…here to prove to you all that I have far from given up on this story. I never did and here's the next installment. As for excuses, there are many in varying degrees of convincingness. But I'll mention a few. I went away to Africa over winter break so was unable to use any of that free time to work on this. I have this thing, you may or may not have heard of it, but it's called a life, and I am rather fond of seeing my friends and breathing the fresh air that is in such absence in my room (where this computer resides). I also was stricken with some intense writer's block, which made this chapter very slow in the writing. You should all just be glad I got sick, cuz I wrote about half this chapter in that one day. And then of course my betas were both quite busy and never really sent this back to me..so finally I just went screw it and read through this thing and posted it. I apologize if you find errors…its all self-editing. I figured you'd all appreciate an update more than a perfect chapter.

**NOTE**: I feel sure I've mentioned this before, but I'll do so again…if you're ever curious about things such as if I've given up or am making any progress whatsoever…you should check the 'story status' section of my profile, i'm pretty good about updating it frequently… or at least when things are happening with my story, its pretty accurate about where I am with it at the present time. So if you ever are curious …that's the place to go

**ALSO**: anyone who would like to recommend a story to me, either your own or someone elses, that you think I'd like… please feel free to say so in you review or email me about it and ill be sure to check it out.

**Disclaimer: **yeah yeah… I know. JKR gets all credit… im just a worthless teenage writer not even attempting to live up to her brilliance. You don't have to shove it in my face.

**Musings**

_Paranoia paranoia  
__Everybody's coming to get me  
__Just say you never met me  
__I'm running underground with the moles  
__Diggin__' holes  
_  
-Flagpole Sitta by Harvey Danger

_I remember when I used to be so much different. So… oh I don't even know how to describe it. I was so relaxed. So much more the optimist. I didn't always feel like I had to watch my back. I wasn't suspicious of everyone, afraid to trust even my closest friends. Let's just say certain events put things in a different light, and I seem to be irrevocably changed. Or am I? I've found myself slipping unconsciously back into my old ways. I try to pull myself back into the shell I wasn't supposed to let anyone into… but I keep finding myself too near the edge, and each time it's harder to pull myself back… but I have to. Don't I? I guess the main issue was really trusting people, but there is a certain paranoia I gained as well. God I remember I used to tell them everything, absolutely everything. Even the stuff they honestly didn't care about knowing. I told them my secrets, my crushes, my dreams, my theories on life… there was hardly anything I kept locked up. But now…? You could fill books with the things I've got locked up. And nobody knows… well no, that's not quite true, no one…except him. He knows… he pretends like he doesn't…he plays innocent. But does he really think that act fools me? How could he possibly think I had forgotten the crucial detail of his presence? How he killed my innocence that day… dragged me into a harsh reality I was not ready for. He locked me up inside that shell and unintentionally made sure I would never let anyone in again. _

_But I guess he didn't do as good a job as he thought, why else would I keep breaking my own rules? Maybe you just can't escape your own nature… I don't know. I'm torn between two opposite ideas, one part of me wants that shell… cherishes it with a zealous love. It knows what happened, and is damn set on preventing a repeat. It won't let me endanger myself and those I love again. But the other part… that's a whole other ball game. That part, wants to go back to the old Lily, the Lily that trusted easily, loved easily. The chill Lily, the one who let her guard down often… but I guess it was just too often. _

_I mean maybe this was my punishment, I was too trusting, too relaxed…and it came back around and slapped me in the face. And it's that uptight part of me that keeps dragging me back into that shell. Don't get me wrong now, it's not like I don't trust anyone…I mean at least not to certain degrees. I mean it's not like I don't tell stuff to Sydney or Vanessa…or any of the guys too… though I'm probably more wary around them… considering **he's** in their group and everything. I'm pretty normal about telling normal stuff… girly secrets, rules I've broken, funny stories… just about everything; it's not that stuff that changed. It's just that there's a bullet proof shield now, around anything and everything to do with…**it.** Ask me anything about that and you can damn well forget about. I'll turn cold on you in the time it takes to snap your fingers. I'll change the subject, ignore you completely… even excuse myself to leave the room if need be. It's just so hard… I mean how do you know you can really trust anyone… when one of your closest friends, the one who knew all your secrets, the one who really got you… betrayed you in the worst possible way. And to top it off, he threw that horrible mistake in your face, he laughed at the friendship you had cherished so highly and then he betrayed you, totally and completely beyond any forgiveness. _

The gentle curve of the sun slowly became more and more visible as the minutes ticked on. Golden shafts of sunlight pierced the early morning dark, lifting the gloom and instilling a hopeful feeling in all who witnessed it. When Lily had been younger, she used to do this quite often, just sitting on the window seat, curled up in a flannel blanket. It was a very pleasant way to wake up and gave her a very refreshed feeling, reminding her that this was new day, wiped clean of yesterday's regrets. It was an old habit that had somehow faded out over the years, but one she now decided might be useful to bring back. For as well as being a relaxing way to start the morning, it was also the perfect time to sort out your thoughts. No one in her dorm was ever up at this hour and everything was covered in a thick blanket of silence. She hadn't really come to many conclusions, and it seemed that she'd just been rambling on with self-contradictions, but somehow it still felt useful to get out some of her thoughts and discover things lurking in her subconscious that she hadn't previously been aware of. The golden orb in the sky broke free from the mountains cradling it and took its place in the sky. Lily let out a long contented sigh and slid off the window seat. She looked around the room, quickly filling up with sunlight and knew that at least Sydney would soon be waking. She thought for a minute, and decided she better not take any chances. She crossed the few feet to her bed and closed all the drapes around her.

_If I ever did let them crack open my shell, shatter the glass completely… would I be free and happy? Or would the pieces just come crashing down on top of me. _

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Lily collapsed into one of the squashy armchairs near the edge of the common room and breathed out a deep sigh. Remus watched her from afar. The Lily he once knew was not a solitary person; she thrived on the company of others. Yet he had noticed her seeking time to herself more and more. It was a gradual process he doubted she even noticed herself. He couldn't pinpoint the first time he'd realized it was happening, but he was quite sure that it had been quite some time, years even. She would steal off alone for hours at a time. Sirius had teased her about sneaking off to see a secret lover, but after seeing her uncomfortable look, he dropped the subject immediately. No one knew where she went and none dared to ask. It wasn't that there was anything wrong with spending time alone, everyone did it… but… with her… the old Lily had never disappeared for hours on end.

She had changed in so many ways. But then again, so had all of them. They had all grown up, or at least hopped on a train in that direction. Yet somehow he felt like her development was unique from the rest of them… that there was something going on that was shaping her differently and more extremely then the others. _Maybe I'm just imagining things._ Perhaps as proof in itself was the fact of how much more he thought about her. He worried more, wondered more, and as their friendship had grown…he cared more too. Remus was a champion worrier. He was always looking out for everyone else. Keeping the marauders from getting in over their heads whether it be with pranks or with girls. He was also the master of advice… it seemed all his friends went to him when they had a pressing issue. And he liked it… he was good at figuring out other people's lives, and it was good to be needed. And Lily… she was an ever-present problem on his mind. He had always prided himself on being the observant one… the perceptive one… that's why he was so good at advice.

But Lily was a puzzle he couldn't figure out. He couldn't make heads or tails of the girl, or rather the one she was becoming… and it bothered him more then he would ever admit. It seemed she was having some sort of internal battle against herself, her behavior was always changing. She would let loose and then suddenly become twice as uptight. She seemed to hold so many secrets now. He had never prided himself on knowing everything about her… but he had always gotten the impression that her, Sydney, and Kelly shared just about everything. But now, he sensed that Lily had put up a wall and was holding certain things captive behind it. And she kept more from him too. He noticed that she never confided in him as much as she had in, say, second year. It was gradual, just as her slow slip into solitude was… gradual, so gradual it would slip by unnoticed to most. But Remus had always been perceptive. And yet… he couldn't seem to figure out Lily. He mused to himself the strangeness of the way he studied his friends in that removed way… as if they were a math problem; he carefully gathered his information and methodically calculated the answer. Sometimes it felt so cold and sterile though.

Suddenly his subject hopped up from her chair and began walking purposefully towards the common room exit. Remus redirected his gaze, and noticed that Jordan had just walked in. _What is Lily doing talking to him?_ It was another mystery to add to the list. She grinned at him as she spoke, though they were too far away for Remus to hear the words.

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Lily looked up and saw that Jordan had just walked into the common room. She pulled herself out of the embrace of the chair and walked over to him.

"Hey Jordan."

He looked genuinely pleased to see her and gave her a big grin. "Hey Lils."

_Did he just call me Lils? Isn't it a bit soon for nicknames?_ "Kelly told me what you did that night I collapsed."

"Oh, you're welcome; it was no big deal… I just did what anyone would've done."

"Uh Jordan, I hadn't thanked you yet"

His face tinted pink with embarrassment. "Right. Sorry."

"So, uh thanks Jordan."

"You're welcome."

Lily glanced around the room and made to close the conversation. Jordan noticed and made a desperate stab at keeping her interested. "So uh, is Sydney feeling better?"

"Oh yes, she's doing great. She's gotta take a bunch of potions still… but she's her old self again." "That's great" "Yeah…" Jordan could feel himself loosing her interest again. "Hey, you want a game of chess?"

_No, not really. I would love to go sink back into that deliriously comfortable chair for a bit. But he **did** do me a big favor… one game of chess won't hurt. It's the least I can do to repay him. _"Sure, I'd love to."

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Lily slipped up to the common room to catch a few hours alone before dinner. She flopped down on her bed, her body eagle-spread on the white comforter. She remained like that for a period of about ten minutes, then abruptly pulled herself into a sitting position. She hopped off the bed and began fishing around in her trunk for something. After a few minutes her hands found their destination and she walked away carrying a thick book, bound in leather that had been stained a deep shade of red. She sat back down on the bed, propping herself up on numerous pillows. She stared down at the book in her lap and realized with sense of absolute certainty that this was the real reason she had come up here, even if she had not consciously realized it until now.

She opened the book and reread the inscription on the inside cover. In neat, loopy hand writing, someone had written a note in black pen.

**My Darling Daughter,**

**Happy 10th Birthday! ****I can't believe you've already  
****reached**** the double digits. ****You're getting to be such a big girl,  
****I'm beginning to worry you'll catch up with me soon.  
****And next year you'll be starting ****at**** the middle school!**

Lily paused here, feeling slightly remorseful. For she **hadn't** continued on to the middle school the next year. That summer she turned 11 had thrown away those plans with the arrival of a certain bird carrying a message from the place she now considered a second home.

**I know you'll do fantastic there,  
****don't**** worry about it for a second. ****Just remember,  
I'm proud of you no matter what.**

**I know this album looks impossibly large,  
****but**** I'm hoping that you'll have room to  
****keep**** filling its pages for many years to come.  
****Much Love,  
****Mum and Dad**

Although her father had signed the card, it was her mother who had penned the words and from whom the message had really come from. Lily took in a deep breath. Her throat constricted slightly as she turned to the first page of photographs. She had arranged it chronologically, or as best she could. So she found herself confronted with a dozen shots of a chubby little infant with a tuft of carrot-colored hair sticking straight up and huge blue eyes such as most babies possess before turning to their real color. Then came the toddler shots, portraying a stumbling child, still unsure about this whole business of moving about on ones own. The hair had multiplied in quantity, but had, for the most part, given up on resisting gravity.

After entering the magical world, Lily had been fascinated by the moving photographs. She quickly learned how to make them, and took plenty… but it suddenly occurred to her that she might be able to take old photograph film and make moving shots out of previous stills. This experiment was a complete success, and so the pre-Hogwarts pages were dotted with moving shots, paired up with their frozen counterparts.

Lily came across one of the picture on the next page. A seven-year old girl with messy red locks falling to her shoulders and oversized, pink-rimed sunglasses rested on her freckled nose. She had on a white, puffy, tiered skirt and was waving furiously at her sixteen-year old self. Lily laughed as the girl began twirling around in circles, her arms spread out, the skirt flying in the air. Lily's face became sad all of a sudden, mourning the loss of such pure innocence. Sometimes she wished she could go back to the days of dress-up and twirling in the grass. The days of being overjoyed simply because the sun was shinning.

She turned the page. There was another photo of the same girl, the same outfit, the same day. But there was someone else in the photo this time. A boy in red short-sleeved, button-up shirt whose buttons had not ended up in the right holes. He wore a shiny black top-hat in an effort to join the girl's game. He chased after the girl, both of them shrieking and laughing like mad. He caught up with her after a minute or two. He launched himself at the girl, tickling her stomach and making her laugh even harder. He seemed to know just when things had ceased to be fun for the girl, and when that time came he withdrew his hands and flopped down on the grass. A sudden gust of wind came, knocking the top had off the boy's head, revealing a mop of red curls. He ran after it, finally retrieving it from the bush the wind had dropped it onto.

Lily's shoulders spasmed, and a single tear coursed down her cheek. It was soon followed by another one. She rubbed the palms of her hands into her eyes in an attempt to stem the flow of tears. Her hands dropped into her lap in defeat. She let the album fall to the floor. She curled up into a ball and pulled a pillow towards her and smashed her face into it.

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James, Sirius, Remus were spending the last few hours of sunlight lounging about under a huge tree near the edge of the lake. Peter had been with them earlier, no one knew when it had happened but it had suddenly occurred to James that he just wasn't there anymore. Sirius was making a card tower from his exploding snap deck. James was reading a book on famous Quidditch teams and Remus was gazing blankly at the lake, sparkling in the late afternoon sun.

,.-''-.,.-''-.,

Sydney looked out the window and realized that the day would soon be closing and she hadn't even been outside yet. During all her time in the hospital wing she had looked out the window and longed to smell the lake and taste the fresh air. And now that she could, she was determined to take advantage of it. She zipped up her sweatshirt and headed out.

Once outside she scanned the grounds for friendly faces. She spotted the Marauders under a tree twenty feet away. She slowly began the walk over, savoring each second in the crisp, chilly air.

She flopped down next to Remus, who gave a slight jerk as he was torn from his thoughts and shoved back into the present.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"Don't worry about it. I was just off in la la land." Sydney gave a short laugh and smiled. She reached her hand up behind her head and freed her hair from the pony tail holder keeping it in a bun. The mild breeze blew it out behind her and Sydney felt completely at peace, sitting here with her friends, letting the wind caress her face… nothing to worry about. She turned her head up at the darkening blue sky and gave a huge child-like grin and a cute little laugh.

Remus watched all this silently, with a smile pulling at his lips. "Wow, isn't it just…" she seemed to be having trouble finding the perfect word to describe what she saw, "…amazing."

Remus nodded slowly. "Yeah, yeah it is." Her happiness seemed to be contagious, for soon he was grinning too. He reached his arms into the air to stretch and caught an upside-down view of the sun beginning to set behind him. He swiveled his body to face it. Sydney followed suit and gave a gasp as the sky began to light up orange. Streaks of gold and purple and red appeared as the color intensified.

James and Sirius noticed too, and joined them.

A smile played on James' face and even Sirius, who was not much for nature appreciation, seemed interested… even awed.

They sat there until the glorious October sun fell completely behind the mountains. Then, with the imminent approach of darkness, they picked up their things and headed in.

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Once they reached the common room Sydney bid them goodbye and headed up to the dorm to change and freshen up for dinner. When she opened the door to her dorm, she heard the sounds of someone sobbing. She quickly located the source of the noise and found herself in front of Lily's bed. She immediately put together the pieces, the photo album lying on the floor, her friend curled up with the covers pulled up completely over her head, a position Lily referred to as being "in her cave".

"Oh Sweetie."

Lily revealed her red face and looked up at her friend through bloodshot eyes. Sydney immediately pulled her into a tight embrace, trying to absorb some of her pain. She rubbed the girls back, trying to sooth the shaking body and stop the flood of tears. And slowly, the shaking did subside. The tears evaporated leaving red cheeks and a wet pillow as the only evidence they had ever been there.

Lily sniffed and was quickly offered a tissue by Sydney which she thankfully accepted. "Why does it still affect me like this?"

Sydney made a sympathetic face. "Because you loved him. He was your everything, and you don't just lose everything and get over it quickly."

"But it's been a while, shouldn't it be getting better… at least a little?"

"It has, a little, I've noticed it even if you haven't. But this isn't just going to go away. He'll always be with you, whether it's remembering the end or the beginning, the sad or the happy."

"So why can't I remember the happy times without getting like this."

"You will," she said with confidence, "maybe not today, maybe not this year, but someday, you will."

Lily looked up at her, and gave a mournful smile. She gave her friend another hug and whispered, "Thank you," into her windblown hair. Sydney just squeezed her back.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up. We don't want to miss dinner."

A/N: i apologize for the utter lack of Kelly in this chapter... it wasn't intentional..she just somehow didn't make it in...i promise she'll be in the next one. im thinkingthe black detectice agency with probably hold a meetingnext chapter... but dontquote me on that.

**To my reviewers:** who threaten me with all sorts of creative death, cheer me on, beg me for clues…etc etc..i thank you, please keep up the good work. Each one propels me to write. And to all you stinkers who are reading this and haven't reviewed… I would really appreciate it if you would take two minutes from your life and donate them to my cause. Short is fine, boring is fine … just let me know you're out there and liking (or not liking) what you read. And here is my many thanks to all of you:

**SnoopyViz: **why thank you, im glad you like it:D never fear, updates shall follow. **S**

**ystamatic: **oh don't feel bad, I don't mind the reviews pushing me to update..in fact they kinda of help spur me on. OMG that is horrible! I feel so terrible for you… that is absolutely awful! Nothing as drastic happened to me, although there were good things that may have distracted me. I know, they are seriously out to get me! O I intend to. **Eternamente: **hey… well its Friday today when im reading this.. hurrah, the weekend is here! Ooh that's awesome! Wait so are you going to the premiere thingy? Don't faint:P see you Monday

**Amelia Bedelia: **thanks for all the help on that chapter! I'm so glad you liked it! Speaking of keeping writing… when's the update on YOUR story coming?

**Flame Of Desire:** thanks, im glad you like it. Well of course I will. By the way, kool sn:D

**Lucky-Racer:** well im glad u havn't left me. That's cool..sounds cute:D I never said it was a "clue", just something… and I don't think he's not done realizing things yet. Im glad you liked the countdown scene..it just kinda came to me and wasn't sure about it at first, but I liked it… so it stayed in….. lol I know, people do funky stuff in class when they think the teacher can't see:D I never did mean to keep Sydney in the hospital that long, it just sort of worked out that way… though I hope you don't feel she was too absent from the story while there..i do hope I kept you informed of her..even if she wasn't the most active part of the plot. I had a pretty good Halloween, better then last year..there was quite a bit of drama…..hope yours went well too….and your thanksgiving, and new years too since those holidays have crept up between updates. Well I'm glad this chapter didn't disappoint you too much:D

**Secludeddark**im so glad you like it:D this won't be the last time you feel bad for james… updating as soon as that inconvenient thing I like to call a life allows for it:D

**Clairebear**Ooo I got you addicted… I feel so special and influenctial:D yeah I kinda realized the pete thing didn't really work….and since you told me not too..i feel obliged to mention a certain peter we both know and love…or should i say knew. Hope you had a lovely thanksgiving, new years and all that jazz. I'm afraid the update clearly didn't make your birthday..lol, sorry. I definetly plan on continuing this fic…obviously. If you want Africa pics, check out the livejournal. Or I can email you some if you want… just let me know. dear, I must be off… many sweet goodbyes and pasta products (hope u figure that one out so I don't seem quite so stupid)

**Angelps7: **yes, yes, I know it has…. Well your waiting is over madear.

**Jersey**** Princess: **wow thank you so much for reviewing, like every chapter. You read every review to look for clues? Wow… im so glad you're so into my story. I'm afraid I can't tell you the secret… not even my betas know (including the ones that are my friends… as in like people I go to school or camp with). You've been begging for clues, but hopefully you'll find some in this chapter, or it will at least temporarily quench your need for more info. Thanks for all the creative threats… here's your reward.

**SlippersRfuzzy**It's fine…long reviews aren't necessary (though I love'em, of course)...and I appreciate tremendously that you took the time to review at all. Goodness, go get some sleep then. Well thank you, so glad you like it! This wasn't exactly "soon" but I did post more, one out of two… I could do worse.

**LillyEvans13:** HI… why thank you:D here's your update…not soon, but hey, It's here…that's the important part.

**MaraudersFan** Gracias… Well your waiting is over, cuz here it is

**KyleBroflovski: **wow I really haven't updated in a long time…if ur excited bout team America…lol. I know you love being the star in my story… or at least im sure u think ur the star:P ugg im home sick today:P

**Prongsiesxlilyxflower**thank you. Never fear, I would never do such a dreadful thing as abandon this story.

**now**** REVIEW! **


	10. Incorrect Assumptions

**A/N- **_**guess**_ _**who's back? Back again? ... **__** I **__**am back… **__**tell**_ _**a friend?**_**  
(that to the tune of slim shady, of course)**

**It's true. Unbelievable, I'm quite aware, but true nonetheless. You thought I was gone, you accused me of abandonment, yet here I am, back to prove you all wrong. I was recently alerted that it has been more that a year since my last update. I must apologize, that's rather ridiculous, even for my standards. Read my profile for some insight as to why this had been such a long and arduous process. **

**As for this update, I would lend at least some thanks to **_**Victoria Humblydum **_**who's five reviews and friendly urging, somehow got me to finally write the last bit of this. This update is dedicated to you for unknowingly giving me the inspiration I needed.**

**Since it has been so long, it's only fair to assume that at least a few of you have forgotten completely what's happened thus far in this story, as I'm sure you're reading scads of others at the same time…and so you won't have to go back and re-read the whole damn thing (or worse yet, not and just give up on reading the chapter altogether), here's a brief plot refresher:**

**Ch1****: Lily has a flashback to dying her hair black at the beginning of third year. We meet Kelly and Sydney, her two best friends, along with the Marauders. We discover she hates James, and a little later that James has no idea why.**

**Ch2****: On the train to Hogwarts, Lily feigns sleep and overhears the other lamenting over the fact that they don't hang out as much as they would like b/c of Lily and James' feud, James tells them he doesn't hate her, the other are surprised and Lily scoffs to herself. **

**Ch3****: Lily feels bad keeping her friends apart, so she tells them not to let her get in the way of their friendship. Lily evades Sydney**'**s questions about why she hates James. James and Sirius discuss James' discontent with the current situation w/ Lily.**

**Ch4****: The girls find Sydney** **sick in bed and take her to the hospital wing.**

**Ch5****: Remus worries about Sydney. The group goes to visit her. We meet Jordan, Kelly observes him staring at Lily, she recalls hearing bad things about him.**

**Ch6****: That night, Kelly goes down to the common room after Sirius calls for her. He wants to figure out why Lily hates James, he questions Kelly to see what she knows. Kelly agrees to help Sirius with his detective work, they agree to arrange to question Sydney** **when they visit. Sydney** **is getting fed up with being bedridden. The gang goes to visit her. **

**Ch7****: Sirius gives Sydney** **a 2-way mirror so they can question her later after everyone else leaves. We meet some of the girl's in their year: Corbin Deasy (nice, quidditch player), Claire Gold ("devil herself", typical snobby teenager, Lily hates her), Rochelle Renovo (follower of Claire), Jana Knight (badass, witty, tells off Claire, Lily likes her)---basically just sets up some more minor characters. Sirius and Kelly talk to Sydney on the mirror, she doesn't know anything either. Kelly walks in on Lily having a nightmare (or possibly a flashback?). Kelly takes Lily to the hospital wing, she gets a sleeping draught, takes it in the common room, immediately collapses, Jordan appears and levitates her back to bed.**

**Ch8****: Sydney** **is in the hospital wing, Pomfrey puts her in charge of two students who were fighting, the boy insulted the muggle-born girl, Sydney** **threatens him to keep him from attacking her too. Peter, after having spent the subsequent period at Durmstrang, has just arrived at Hogwarts. The group goes to visit Sydney,** **we discover the boy is Regulus Black. Sydney** **is released finally. Kelly and Sirius explain their plan to Remus, he disapproves of their meddling, esp when it seems Lily doesn't want people to know. But he suggests they convince the two to sit down and talk it out.**

**Ch9****: Lily muses about how she's changed as she watches the sun rise. Remus muses about how Lily's changed and how she confuses him as he watches her in the common room. Lily thanks Jordan** **for rescuing her that night. Lily looks through an old photo album and at some point starts crying, Sydney** **finds her there and comforts her, she seems to know why Lily is crying, though it is unclear to the audience.**

**Whew, that took upwards of 15 minutes, so I hope you all found it useful. **

_**Disclaimer: I wouldn't flatter myself to think anyone would get me mixed up with the person who actually owns all this.**_

**Incorrect Assumptions**

_The night was punctured with the soft thudding of feet on cement. Lily's breathing became labored and heavy, but she refused to slow her pace. She chanced a glance over her shoulder; she could see him, far away, but closer than last time. He was gaining on her. Her mind sifted through thirteen years of living in the place for some advantage. The idea struck her out of nowhere, and with renewed determination she increased her pace. She ducked into an alley and raced to the chain link fence at the end of it. Sucking in her breath, she slipped through the opening, ducking her head to avoid the chain locking it shut. She stopped in front of a circular piece of metal in the street and, grasping onto the handle, pulled it aside. She descended the slippery ladder, careful to pull the metal cover back over the hole once she was through. Ten feet down her feet met water. She gasped from the cold, but clenched her hands into fists and let herself drop into the knee high water of the abandoned sewer pipe. It had been damaged in an earthquake seventeen years prior and she had snuck down here half a dozen times before. Only this time, instead of hiding from her own demons, her pursuer was real. She heard a clatter of shoes on the ladder. She quickened her pace, sloshing through the water as silently as she could. The clanging became louder. It sounded as if the ladder were right next to her, even though she knew for a fact it was at least thirty feet back. "Damn echo," she thought with a shiver. But the volume continued to increase—only now there was a rhythm, long short short, almost as if he were playing a drum. In fact very much like he was playing a drum, why the sound was really quite identical, she wondered why she hadn't noticed it before. Suddenly cold, clammy hands wrapped around her arm. Her muscles clenched in terror and her mouth opened to scream. _

Her eyes snapped open and were confronted with a pair of bright blue eyes. Lily blinked. They were attached to a yellow blob. She blinked again. A head…with the hair wrapped up in a towel. Kelly's head. And Kelly's cold, wet hands pulling away in fright. Kelly's eyebrows scrunched up in concern. "Are you alright?" Lily took in a long shaky breath, trying to root herself more firmly in reality.

"Yeah, fine," she said dismissively.

"I didn't mean to startle you."

"Really, it's no big deal." Lily roughly shoved back the covers and rolled out of bed straight onto the floor. She winked at Kelly, who laughed, and jumped to her feet. "See? Fabulous as ever."

"Yes, yes, very cute. Why don't you get your fabulous self into some fabulous clothes so you don't miss a fabulous breakfast and end up fabulously hungry all day. For that would be most unfabulous, and then I **would** have a valid reason for concern."

Lily slipped into her robes, flattened away a few stray wisps of hair with her hands, and declared herself ready.

* * *

That evening Lily found herself in the common room, putting the final touches on a potions essay. She re-read the last sentence and, with a satisfied smile, rolled up the parchment and tucked it into her book bag. She sucked in a deep breath, realizing that the air felt thick. All of a sudden it was too hot and there were far too many people surrounding her. She felt her head spin and she was certain of one thing; she had to get out of here. She looked around, noting the positions of her friends. Remus, Sirius, and Kelly were sprawled out on the floor in front of the fire. Sirius seemed to be entertaining them with impressions of various Hogwarts residents. Remus was filling in a star chart, but seemed to be paying more attention to Sirius. Sydney was off in a corner discussing Quidditch strategy with James and one of the Gryffindor chasers. Lily's exit would not be noticed.

She pulled a purple woolen sweater over her head and, as unobtrusively as possible, exited the common room. The corridors were blessedly empty. She pushed through the double doors and entered the grounds. She noticed a few lingering groups of students near the lake. She headed away from them, nearer to the forest. When she was out of sight of the other students, she halted her trek and flopped onto the ground. Somehow the silence and the emptiness soothed her agitation. She gazed up at the steadily darkening sky, wistfully considering how lovely it would be if she could remain out here until the stars came out. She loved the night sky, and at Hogwarts, away from the city, she could see so much more. It really was too bad that curfew prevented her appreciating it at any other times than during Astronomy class. Unfortunately, such a train of thought could only serve to remind her of the hour. And so she picked up her bag and, with one last upwards glance, she turned around and started to make her way towards the castle. She had only taken a few steps when she felt a shocking sensation on her nose. And there it was again. The same feeling, this time just above her left eye. Now there were five more, tickling her cheek. And with no more warning than that, the heavens opened and the first rain of the year came crashing down to earth.

She could, of course, have cast any number of spells to protect herself from the downpour. But sometimes, she preferred to just experience life instead of using magic to protect herself from it. And so, an hour after she had left, Lily clambered into the common room, her robes dripping onto the floor and her cheeks flushed. Remus puzzled over the unusually carefree smile. And then he smiled too.

* * *

Our lives are full of incorrect, and often unfounded, assumptions. Such was the way with Lily's, when she concluded her absence would go unnoticed. Granted there wasn't much at stake to cause her to verify such thoughts, but nonetheless she was mistaken. A pair of hazel eyes had darted up when they saw a flash of red go by. And so she did not go unnoticed. And she did not go unfollowed either. For not ten minutes after she departed, the hazel eyes excused themselves as innocently as possible and slipped away. Following her outside would have been far too obvious, and so one would logically predict that they would head to the Astronomy tower, giving them a great view of the most popular lurking grounds. But the hazel eyes had taken circumstances into account…and so they do not go the predictable route. They had seen that the red head was not simply going for a walk, she was fleeing. From what, they could not tell, but they imagined she would not flee to a crowd, or to a place she would be looked for first. And so instead, those hazel eyes found themselves somewhere entirely different, in a rather obscure corner of the castle. There were no classrooms in this area, and they wondered if many students had ever been here at all. The air here was stale and untouched; it lacked the buzz of energy that electrified the rest of the castle. The eyes found a window which revealed an unextraordinary section of a grassy field bordering the forest. And there it was, that bright shine of red, standing out in the midst of all that green. 

How he had found her, he did not know. He did not even know why he had followed her. It had been an impulse, like choosing this corner of the castle to search for her. She looked so content, eagle-spread on the grass, looking up into the sky. For a moment, his eyes focused on the area behind her, the dark shadowy area created by the trees. For a moment he started straight into another pair of eyes. And in that moment, the full fallacy of Lily's assumption became clear.

James' trance broke and he hurried back to the common room. He did not see the rain. He did not see Lily dance for a moment, before laughing foolishly and continuing on her way. It was probably best that way, for when she burst into the common room, he was able to look genuinely surprised at her waterlogged state. But most of all, he did not see the eyes in the trees creep forward until silver moonlight lit up a nose, and then a forehead, cheeks, a mouth. He did not see the figure walking just behind the first row of trees, the sparkling eyes glinting, their stare following the redhead, although they could not follow her out of sight of the forest. Perhaps this was for the best too, although such perspective could not exist until much farther into the future. For if James had stayed at that window, he would not have gone unnoticed as he assumed. For he was bound to conclude that such glittering surely could possess only equal or worse eyesight than his own… that such glittering eyes were, of course, human. Once again, dangerous assumptions.

* * *

Remus, James, and Sirius strode across the grounds to the small shed just outside the forest that housed the Care of Magical Creatures classes. It was an odd group that had chosen to sign up for Care of Magical Creatures, and Remus had noticed that they all seemed to have very different motivations for doing so. There was a handful or so of Slytherins who seemed to have signed up on orders from their Dark-Lord-sympathizing parents, clearly in the hopes that they would become familiar with the more dangerous creatures of the world and begin learning the art of their control and manipulation. There were a large number of practical Ravenclaws who seemed to feel it was a necessary subject to familiarize one's self with as a part of living in wizarding society. And then there were The Gigglers, a gaggle of air-headed girls who seemed to have joined the class for two very shallow reasons: first, because it involved things that were both cute and fluffy, and secondly, because somehow word had gotten out the three most attractive Gryffindors in their year would be attending…much to the chagrin of the aforementioned boys.

Oddly enough, it was those very same boys who had signed up for the most interesting reason of all. Remus, practical as any of the Ravenclaws, had come to the conclusion that if they were going to be running around the forest every month, they had at least better be prepared for what they might come across. And even more unusual, James and Sirius had not protested his logic. Peter, however, had been another matter all together. Most of the required subject material frightened him—if truth be told, he often got squeamish during Herbology—and besides, he had argued, as a rat he would easily be able to escape from potential predators much more easily than the rest.

The trio descended the wooden steps that led to the shed where they held classes, and loitered in the brick patio along with the rest of the class until Professor Kettleburn arrived. When he did, shortly after the boys had, a large number of the class grinned. It had rained almost every day the previous two weeks, but today the sun beamed down, finally unobscured by clouds. Professor Kettleburn pretended to ignore the eager looks most of his students were giving him. He slowly put down his leather bag of teaching materials and stretched his arms into the air. He greeted them all with a cheerful "Good Morning". Finally he sighed, trying to hide his grin—a useless gesture; the class knew he enjoyed this even more then they did—and with a feigned look of boredom, he flicked his wand and several things happened in quick succession. The shed's peaked roof split in the middle, each side tipping and sliding down till it was flush with the outside of the walls, then the entire house rose three feet into the air, and all four walls detached from one another and swung under the shed, filling in the space between it and the ground. The shed squirmed for a moment, then jolted another foot into the air and slammed down, somehow squishing the walls into nothingness so that the floor was now flat on the ground, looking like an extension of the patio with desks and chairs.

"Now, class, your attention please." Professor Kettleburn clapped his hands together twice and silence overtook the students as the last of them found seats at the long tables. "Today we are having a very special lesson. It will be unlike any we have had thus far because today we will not have a subject to study, but rather a guest to whom we are extremely lucky to have as a neighbor and whom we will treat with the utmost of respect." He looked rather pointedly at the Syltherins in the back. "I think I will let him introduce himself, so," he turned to face the forest for the last bit and raised his voice slightly, "Ingomar, we are ready for you." A caramel colored centaur with an unattractive face appeared out of nowhere amidst the trees, hesitantly approaching the eager looking Professor.

The Gigglers in the back tried to stifle their laughs, and Remus could just make out their whispers.

"Ingomar, what kind of name is that?"

"Guest? He's just a big ugly horse."

He shook his head and muttered under his breath, "Idiots". The centaur population really got a lot less respect that they deserved. He wondered briefly what snarky comments they would make about **him** if they knew the sort of creature he was. "Stupid, shallow idiots."

* * *

Sydney walked with Lily across the less traveled section of the Hogwarts grounds, and approached Professor Kettleburn's patio. Their class got out ten minutes before the boys' did and they had made a habit of meeting them there before lunch. They plopped onto the grass thirty feet away, not wanting to intrude on the class while it was still in session. They looked up at the sound of many chair legs scraping against the brick and a moment later the boys jogged over to meet them. Lily carefully maneuvered the situation so that she and James were on opposite sides of the group. Sydney saw that he abruptly turned his head the other direction but made no other acknowledgment. He seemed bothered, even if he didn't want it to show, and Sydney was perplexed. The whole dastardly situation was so strange and clouded in mystery. Yet no one openly talked about it and if the others were at all like her, they didn't think about it a whole lot either. It was as if the whole affair was so complicated that no one bothered figuring it out and subsequently, it got shoved out of sight… and out of mind.

They entered the castle through a small, rarely used entrance and found themselves in a narrow passageway, now full of hungry students talking animatedly. The low-ceilinged hall was far too small to contain this much energy. Far, far, too small. Sydney looked from side to side nervously, had the walls really been that close a moment ago? She tried to shake her sudden claustrophobia and drew in a big breath. The air was hot and sticky. She inhaled once more, feeling as if her nose was extremely congested, though she knew it wasn't. She felt slightly light headed and noticed her breaths had become shallow and more frequent. She tried taking a long slow breath through her mouth, but it felt as if she were sucking air through a straw. Her lips and fingertips tingled and she could hear her heart pounding in her ears. The noises around her were muted, her concentration fully focused on trying to slow the rapid breathing before someone noticed. Her legs felt like jelly. She was gradually loosing the battle as the rate of her breaths increased. Abruptly, they turned loud and shaky, as if she had just run a mile. She could escape notice no longer and Remus, who was closest, grabbed her elbow to steady her and gazed at her with concerned eyes. And then a dozen other pairs of eyes were on her as well. She tried to speak, unsure herself if she was trying to reassure them or seek help.

"I…I…don't…I…", each word was punctuated by an uncontrolled intake of air, her shoulders and chest roughly jerking upwards with each one. James cleared his throat and spoke with authority.

"Someone fetch Pomfrey." He looked around, but no one moved. "Go, god damn it!" This time there was an undercurrent of panic in his voice. Four students jumped up and took off running. He shook his head, muttering to himself. Then he rounded on the rest of the students, still standing in the hallway, gaping shamelessly. "As for the rest of you lot, clear out." His hazel eyes glared fiercely, challenging anyone to defy him. The whispering crowd immediately dispersed and hurried down the hallway, a few glancing back over the shoulders one last time. James sneered at them for emphasis before turning back to see Kelly and Sirius looking at him curiously. Lily and Remus were crouched beside Sydney, who looked as though she had fainted. He quickly dropped to his knees to help.

Remus looked over at him uncertainly, "Should we try to move her?"

Just then footsteps thudded down the hall as the nurse came flying in at top speed. They all jumped out of the way, leaving her an open path to the still unconscious Sydney. Madam Pomfrey conjured a stretcher, levitated the girl onto it, and proceeded to bustle down the hallway without any further explanation. They all looked from one to the other, none of them exactly sure what had happened.

* * *

**A/N- I think ffnet is trying to punish me, it kept the formatting of my chapter, but none of the spacing...I had to go back through and hit enter for every single paragraph...err. Anyways... **

**Thanks to everyone who has kept up with this story, I really appreciate all the continued feedback and support.**

**Oh, and I think you'll all be delighted to hear that a whole new bit of plot that fits in ever so nicely with what I have planned already just popped into my head, so hopefully the next update won't take nearly so long.**

**Just a reminder, I do still post status reports on my profile pretty much every time there is any sort of development with this story. If you'd been reading it recently, you would have known this chapter was coming several weeks before it was actually posted on the site**

**ALSO, I HAVE A NEW STORY. I'm afraid I've been abducted by the _Twilight_ and _New Moon_ books and have created a new story under that category. If you haven't read these books, you might want to read them first...but honestly, my story takes place before they begin and is based on a few basic facts from the books. It won't ruin the books for you and shouldn't be too confusing if you haven't read them (though there might be one or two things you might be confused about that you'd figure out as it goes on) ... but really they are amazing books, so you should read them anyways. **

**from** **now on I'll be responding to reviews using the review reply feature. But since my last update was so long ago, here the responses to those I didn't contact that way because it didn't exist at the time. Keep in mind, I write these as soon as I receive the review, in case they seem outdated in any way.**

**Jersey** **Princess:** ooops… yes I did mean Kelly when I said Vanessa…see the character Kelly is named after my friend Vanessa (don't ask)… so yeah, it was an error. I'm so glad you're so enthusiastic about this story. And that you liked the chapter… I wasn't sure if my warped sick (literally… since if you recall I was sick when I wrote most of this) mind had made it really weird without me realizing. Good theories…afraid I can't confirm or deny...per usual. Ly loads too…thanks for the review as always.

**Kyle Broflovski:** hey Syd! I remember when I was sick too… wasn't one of my more enjoyable experiences I shall admit. Oooh you're birthday party is coming up… gonna be rocking. I have no idea what im getting you…though when you read this I'm sure we'll both know what I got you. oh and congrats on being the first to review this chapter… or at least ur review email was first in my inbox. As for the "up against a wall and yell shoot"… well when someone wants to execute someone (such as for taking such a long time to update) one might enlist the help of a firing squad. Needless to say I'm quite pleased that no one decided to do this after all. **Livingdead2010: ** thanks… I'm glad you liked it.

**IcyCrystal: **first off I would just like to say thank you for that incredibly nice review. I truly appreciate it. Yes, Sydney's last name is Schwartz. As for the german thing, that very well might be, but I used it because it is one of my closest friend's last names, and I happen to like it. However, there is one character in this story whose name I did in fact choose for its meaning in another language, though what it means doesn't reveal new information, just stuff I've already said. Thanks again for such a nice review.

**Jeshie:** I'm so glad I've got you "hooked"… good to know there's a loyal reader out there. Me..an author someday… wow thanks, that's **quite** a compliment:D

**Clairebear: **damn you, I have two more weeks left of school. We get out the 24th…grr. Ooh yay, im glad you like my description. I understand darling…I've got finals next week (but no Tahiti, unfortunately). Ooh so Ollie's coming the first week of august (its pretty much for sure)… so you'll meet him again. And Young isn't coming so like you're gonna be my main person to hang out with (lucky you). Love you to death as well (platonically, of course… as you said, I have my Ollie :D )

**Xarli:** oooh a new reader, that's always nice to know. Thanks, I'm glad you like it, and I certainly don't plan on stopping.

**slippersRfuzzy: **why thank you. I'm a rather slow writer as you may have noticed, but they always come out eventually.

**Beachbabe17:** why thank you, I really like you for reviewing.

**Mandakhristine07: ** wow! It made you cry, I'll take that as quite a big compliment. I'm really really glad it touched you. Although I haven't had a major event steal my innocence, I often find myself missing the good old days when things were so much more simple and pure. Thanks for such a nice review.

**Emily Kert: **hey cuz, thanks for reading my weirdo story, glad you like it

**Cilverblood:** aww that's too bad, well hopefully it wasn't too confusing for you and that you catch on… or possibly have time to re-read. **Or check out the chapter summaries at the top of this chapter for a quick refresher.**

**Calcgirl:** oh wow thanks, im so glad you love the mystery; I really quite enjoy writing it.

**Maria: **thank you…your threat gave me a good laugh, hopefully I have updated soon enough to escape such a gruesome punishment

**MaraudersFan:** Hey, if you're happy, I'm happy. And right you should be happy, because this is another update.

**Come on, it's been over a year, give me some love, huh?****  
After all, this chapter was the product of the inspirational powers of reviews**  
…**you never know when yours will be the ONE that made it all possible.**

**  
**


	11. Out of Time

**A/N: Just for the record, as an unsigned-in reviewer asked me about this, so James' eyes ARE hazel as JKR has said herself. Hazel and green are not the same color, so yes Harry's green eyes do still come from his mother.**

**Here is chapter 11, which I am quite proud to say did NOT take me a year to come out with. In fact, I wrote the whole first draft in one day. Enjoy**:

**Out of Time**

Lily looked from Kelly to Remus, both wearing stricken expressions, then gazed down at the end of the hallway. Suddenly she felt exhausted. Kelly rose to her feet and broke the silence,

"Come on guys, we should go catch the end of dinner." Sirus nodded absentmindedly and rose to his feet. He extended a large hand down towards Lily and pulled her up. But the moment he let go she wobbled, too weak to stand, and tumbled backwards into James' arms. She felt his hands grasp her waist to steady her. She hadn't been this close to him in… far too long. Suddenly an old panic bubbled up in her stomach. She tore herself roughly from his hold with renewed energy and took several hurried steps away from him. She whipped her head around to glare malevolently back at him and then abruptly took off running down the hallway.

Sirius looked from James to Lily, and then wordlessly tore after her. Just as he expected, he found her curled up on the floor just around the corner, her surge of energy already burned out. Carefully he scooped her up into his arms and continued down the hallway.

Remus still sat on the floor, his hands shaking. Kelly helped him up.

"You know Pomfrey would just try to chase us out if we went now. We'll have much better luck later, after dinner." It really was astonishing how she read his mind like that. Remus shook his head slightly as if to clear it.

"Of course, you're absolutely right."

"Of course I am," Kelly said with a smirk. It widened into a genuine smile when she saw some of the heaviness in his eyes lift.

* * *

Dinner was an awkward affair. The conversation was forced and purposefully light; they all needed a distraction. Remus was looking unusually pale for that time of the month—he had a good three weeks before he was due to start feeling ill. No one ate much, and despite their late arrival, they all finished early.

By some silent agreement, they all headed straight for the hospital wing. For a moment no would open the door, scared what they would find behind it. So Lily took a deep breath and grasped the doorknob. A harried looking Madam Pomfrey appeared in the waiting room.

"I expect you lot are here to see Miss Schwartz. Well come in." They didn't need to be told twice.

Lily rushed ahead into the next room and gasped. She ran to the side of the bed and looked on in horror at the chalk white face of her friend. She felt the others settle into place around her. She reached out and gently took hold of Sydney's hand. She looked up at Madam Pomfrey.

"Please, what's wrong her?"

Madam Pomfrey sighed.

"She appears to be in some sort of coma. As for the cause, most likely it's the same thing that was troubling her earlier in the year. And we still haven't figured exactly what it was… is. I'm going to run some more tests in the morning, but in the meantime she's stable enough. What she could really use is some company. You know, people in comas can usually hear what you say, even though they can't respond back."

With that, she turned and retreated into her office.

Sirus sighed, and gently patted her golden hair. "Well Syd, it seems you've gotten yourself in a bit of a pickle here." He chuckled to himself. "You really should have seen the way James cleared that hallway. I mean you know as much as I do, the boy's way better at drawing crowds than repulsing them, but you should have seen the way he yelled. You looked downright murderous, mate."

James cracked a half-smile. "What can I say, I guess my magnetism goes both ways now. Rather handy thing to know. Quite a pity I didn't discover it earlier."

Kelly smacked James on the shoulder, "Come on, stop boring Sydney with your ego. Anyone have anything **interesting** to share?"

"Well," Remus mused, "Kettleburn invited a centaur to class today, though the behavior of the class was less than ideal. They're just as sentient as humans yet people acted with no more respect that if a flobberworm had been invited as a guest." Lily reached over and squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. She knew better than most how personal the subject really was. Remus looked embarrassed for a moment, he hadn't intended to share any of this at all, but it was the first thing he had thought of.

"I passed my potions test," Peter offered.

"Good boy," said Sirius, patting Peter's head as he would a dog's. Peter scowled and swatted the hand away.

* * *

So began a pattern of visiting as often as they could, always chattering pleasantly the whole while. They often had their best conversations there. No one was distracted by homework or whatnot. This was time set aside for one specific purpose and it became the one time of the day they could all just sit down, relax, and just be together.

But another pattern developed that was unknown to most of the group. For almost every evening, when all the others were fast asleep, Remus would steal away with James' invisibility cloak. Those visits were special too, in their own way. Remus felt an odd sense of freedom talking to the ever unresponsive girl in front of him. He did not have to worry about her having a bad reaction to anything because she never gave one at all. And so he could tell her anything, and he did. Except, of course, the truth about what he really was. Though he suspected Pomfrey's words were meant to hold more comfort than truth, he could not stand the risk that she was somehow right, and Sydney could understand everything he said.

* * *

As days turned into weeks, and then weeks turned into a month, desperation began to settle down onto the group. If Pomfrey had discovered anything more about Sydney's condition, she wasn't sharing, and while Sydney's health had remained fairly consistent, she was just as consistently unconscious. The only signs that time had not stopped entirely was the slow thinning of her limbs. The nurse was able to feed her intravenously, using a method much more nourishing than the muggle equivalent, but still… a month without real food was starting to take its toll.

Out of the six, it seemed to be having the strangest effects on Remus. While they were all visibly upset, he had been uncharacteristically quiet lately. And Lily noticed dark circles under his eyes. She wondered if he was having trouble sleeping. She worried about her werewolf friend. Lily was terribly sad, but with Remus it was something more. There was desperation in his eyes.

* * *

Remus chanced a glance off to his left, and saw Lily's worried gaze. He forced a brief smile, hoping to ease her concern. She smiled back, but it did not reach her eyes. Remus was beginning to loose all hope and sanity. He couldn't stand not having Sydney around much longer. While he enjoyed his silent confident, it was merely a small consolation in the face of a much greater loss. What he wouldn't give for her silence to be broken.

Ever since the bite he had had an extraordinarily difficult time getting close to anyone. James and Sirius had spent a long time breaking through that hard shell. The fact that they were so determined to get to know him had astounded Remus at the time. It still astounded him sometimes that these boys cared for him the way they did. He so wanted to let Sydney in the way he had them, and he had meant to, really he had… as he repeated again and again to himself. But he thought there would be all the time in the world for that. And now, suddenly time was up. And coward that he was, he hadn't acted. He had blown his chance. But maybe there was still time for someone else.

He hopped up from his armchair and made a beeline for the couch Sirius and James were sprawled out on.

"James, I need to talk to you. In private." James' expression turned serious instantaneously, and without question he rose and followed Remus up to the dorm. Remus loved this side of James and wondered how many people even knew it existed. The side that always knew when to take you seriously, the side that jumped to action whenever things got out of control, the side that had shown itself just a little bit when he cleared out the corridor after Sydney's collapse. As Sirius put it, you could always count on James when shit hit the fan.

James plopped down onto the floor in their traditional corner and Remus followed suit.

"So, what's going on?"

"Well I've been thinking…" He took in a deep breath. "You see this whole thing with Sydney, it's made me realize something. We think we have all the time in the world to sort things out and get things right. But we don't James. And Sydney…I thought I would have all this time…I mean, if ever there was a girl I would have… but James you know how I am. I'm not **good** at getting close to people."

He smiled grimly, "You suck at it."

"Thanks. Look, I've blown this big time. But I'll be damned if I see that happen to you too." He looked pleadingly into his friends eyes, trying to convey the extreme urgency of the situation.

James' eyebrows wrinkled up in confusion. "What are you on about, Moony?"

"Lily. I'm on about Lily. You have to talk to her, you have to find out just exactly what she's so mad about James, because if something happens and if you haven't done anything when it does, you're going to be wondering for the rest of your life. You have to sit her down, and you have to **make**her listen to you."

"Remus, I'm not sure if you quite understand the situation." He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "The girl avoids me like the plague. How exactly do you propose I get her to sit down for any length of time alone with me, let alone be reasonable too?"

"I don't know James. Just, talk to her. I don't know what would make it the most comfortable for her, but you damn better figure it out."

"Remus you ask the impossible. What makes you think I can do this?"

"Because, James, you still love her. Just go to her. Don't snap back, when she tries to run. Let her choose where you talk. Have someone standing outside the door if it makes her feel better. But please, whatever you do, do it soon."

James let out a long sigh and rubbed his palms into his forehead. Then he looked up at Remus and shrugged his shoulders.

"Okay, you win. I'll try." And suddenly, as soon as James made the decision he was overcome by a desperate need to act immediately.

"When?"

"How's right now sound?"

"Fabulous, I'll come down with you."

But Lily was not in the common room when James arrived. He questioned the other sixth year girls, worried his determination would fade if he didn't do this now.

"Come on Knight, I **really**need to talk to her," he pleaded.

"Potter, the girl hates you more than the devil himself, why in the world would I tell you where she is?"

"Ahh, but you **do**know. As a matter of fact, it's precisely because she does hate me that I need to find her. I want to sort things out once and for all. Please Knight? I won't tell her you told me," he implored

"Oh all right, but only because you look so pathetic down on your knees like that. She needed some extra Transfiguration practice, so McGonagall unlocked her classroom for her."

James clasped his hands together and shook them in front of his chest to express his gratitude. Then on an impulse he pulled a very surprised Jana into a bone-crushing hug before tearing off through the portrait hole.

James did not slow his pace until he was right outside the Transfiguration classroom. He stopped and waited for a few moments so he would not sound quite so out of breath, and then entered.

Lily sat at one the desks with her back to him, furiously muttering spells. For a moment he was tongue-tied, silently observing as she threw the teacup she had been attempting to transfigure against the wall in frustration. It shattered upon impact, the noise jarring James out of his frozen state.

"Lily?" he called out softly. He saw her muscles clench, whether in surprise or hate he could not tell. He figured it was probably a combination of both.

The red head hopped up out of her chair so fast that it toppled over with a clatter. A moment later she whirled around, eyes narrowed.

"Lily please, I need to talk to you. Just sit down and listen to me for a second, I'll stand at the other end of the room if you want me to."

"You," she pointed an accusing finger at him, her hand shaking slightly. "You need do nothing that involves me ever again," she said, her voice dripping with malice, and James' heart sank. This was going to be a lot harder than Remus thought.

Lily made to leave in a huff, but he grabbed her arm in a desperate effort to keep her there, to make her listen, as he had promised Remus he would.

"Please, Lily. Tell me what I did?" He saw confusion in her eyes, and for a second he thought she was going to stay. She was finally going to talk to him. But then her eyes turned cold and she pulled away from him.

"I don't believe you," she whispered before gathering her belongings and swiftly exiting the room.

* * *

**A/N: oh yeah, by the way I don't own the HP world, and let that apply to all chapters henceforth.**

**Hope you all enjoyed this and though I'm guessing by the greatly decreased number of reviews I got last chapter that I have lost a lot of readers with my turtle-like qualities, I hope the rest of you will stick with this. Honestly, if it wasn't for all the reviews I would have abandoned this, because it really was a big huge mess. It still is, to some extent, in that I didn't really know what I was doing when I started this. But since people seem to be liking it, I've just decided to not look back and push on ahead.   
**

**IMPORTANT: I'm going abroad for six weeks this summer starting June 30th. I will have computer access (and so will be able to read all your lovely reviews) but won't have access to any of my files. More importantly, the computer is at the school, not where I'm staying… basically I don't foresee being able to do any updates while I'm there. I return August 11th and will continue writing then. **

**BUT…as a consolation, I've already finished the first draft of the next chapter (which is longer than this one) and that will definitely be up before I leave. **

**So…feedback, compliments, criticism, witticism, complaints…bring it on**


	12. Diminished Air

**Diminished Air**

James lay sprawled out under one of the huge trees that occupied the grass near the lake. It was beginning to get quite cold and he shivered despite the brown cashmere sweater he had pulled on before leaving. No matter, the weather was on his side today. He was counting on it to keep the area clear of unwanted eavesdroppers. Still, it was starting to become rather uncomfortable. Fortunately, he did not have to wait long. He soon spotted Remus emerging from the castle and hurried over to intercept him. James led him back to the tree, and after double checking to assure their privacy, he explained what had happened.

"This is going to be a lot more complicated than you anticipated, Moony," he said with an accusatory glance. "It was almost as if…" he replayed the day's events once more in his mind, Lily's trembling hand tattooed across the inside of his eyelids. "Remus, I think she was afraid of me."

Remus' eyebrows shot up. "Well, that does make things more complicated. Whatever she thinks you did, it's bad."

"So what do I do, oh spewer of advice?"

"Well now you have to at least try."

"Easy for you to say." James found himself slightly annoyed. Remus could just sit safely on the sidelines oozing Carpe Diem advice. It was James who was going to have to go back into the lions den.

"Before you decided to get all snotty, I was thinking that you really don't have anything to loose. It isn't as if you could make things worse."

"Well thank you Remus, that's very encouraging." But James privately thought that his friend had a point.

* * *

It is a strange thing indeed how the one person you are looking for is always the one who manages to disappear most effectively. James had decided he wasn't taking no for an answer. But in the mean time Lily seemed to have dropped off the face of the planet. If he hadn't already checked to see that the Marauder's Map was still safely tucked away in his trunk, he would have thought it impossible for her to avoid him so expertly unaided. Of course, he did catch occasional glimpses of her; they shared a few classes after all. But as soon as he called out her name or tapped her shoulder, she disappeared. It wasn't until a week later that he managed to corner her properly.

He had left his seat at lunch to go use the bathroom before class when he found her wandering the empty hallways. She had tucked her long, fiery braid into her cloak and pulled a maroon knit hat down over her ears, which served to effectively shield the beacon-like properties of her hair. He was so overjoyed to have finally found her that he was actually surprised for a split second when she whipped around and glared at him before walking away in the opposite direction.

"Lily," he called out, hurrying after her. "Lily, wait."

"I don't believe this," she muttered under her breath. "Haven't you done enough? Why do you feel the need to pester me like this? Do you enjoy taunting me? Does it give you some sort of sadistic pleasure?"

"I don't…Lily…please…" he stuttered. Then he took a deep breath, gathering his scattered thoughts. "Lily, I really have no idea what you're talking about. Come on, does that sound like the James you used to know."

"The James I used to know would never have done what he did to me. The James I thought I knew never existed." And with those icy words, she stalked off in the opposite direction, and this time James did not try to stop her. He was too shocked to move.

"I'm not going to give up on you Lily," he shouted after her retreating figure.

* * *

James was a man on a mission. But after two weeks of assuming stalker-like qualities, he decided to change tactics. Lily was clearly not going to give in to persistence. He thought back to those pale, trembling hands. If she was truly afraid of him, then he had to do something to show her his intentions were genuine. Or find a way to talk so that she would feel safe. However, this was easier said than done. He racked his and Remus' brains for any ideas, but came up with nothing. Seeing his friend's desperation, Remus reassembled the members of the previously disbanded Black Detective Agencies. He even questioned the still unconscious Sydney, who remained unresponsive as ever. He was beginning to run out of ideas.

A few evenings later, the entirety of the agency, which had swelled to include Peter, plus James found themselves aimlessly wandering the numerous corridors in search of anything that might be useful. They had split up an hour ago and James strolled up one of the staircases alone. When he was halfway to the top, a low creaking noise came from somewhere below him and James cursed under his breath as the staircase began to swing leftwards towards some unknown destination. He found himself in an unfamiliar hallway and was seriously beginning to regret letting Remus have the map for the evening.

James wandered down the hallways for ten minutes hoping to find something he recognized. He soon realized this strategy was not going to work. He began to pace distractedly, muttering under his breath, "I need a place where Lily will feel safe enough to talk to me. This is a huge castle and I don't even know how many passageways I've never seen. Somewhere among them there must be something that will help me. Come on, James, think!" He stopped for a moment and ran his fingers through his forever tousled hair. He looked up and jumped in surprise. There, just a few feet ahead of him was a door in an expanse of hall he was quite sure had been empty a few minutes before. Cautiously he turned the knob, keeping his other hand on his wand. A light clicked on as he opened the door and revealed a very pleasant looking room. The walls were painted a cheerful marigold color and there were several comfortable looking green leather couches with a few multicolored afghans draped over the backs.

James took a step inside. Something made him flinch. There was some strange quality to the air in this room that had not been there out in the hallway. It wasn't any harder to breathe or see, but there was something palpably different that he couldn't put his finger on. He drew his wand out of his pocket and looked around suspiciously. Could he have unknowingly walked into some dangerous spell? Something occurred to him. He pointed his wand at one of the couches and muttered a color change charm. Nothing happened. "Lumos." But no light appeared at the tip of his wand. He tired to send blue sparks from out the tip of his wand. But none appeared. A shiver ran down the back of his neck. For what purpose could such a room exist at Hogwarts? His mind went racing and he realized he had stumbled across the very thing he had been searching for. What better way to make Lily feel safe around him than to strip him of his magic. He sank into one of the leather couches and felt something poke into his thigh. Of course, in the confusion of being lost he had forgotten that he had one of the two-way mirrors in his pocket. He quickly pulled it out and summoned Remus, and after a moment he appeared in the smooth glass. He was surprised that it had actually worked. Well, it wasn't active magic after all. The mirror had already been charmed.

"Moony, I've found it!" he cried out in excitement.

"What? Where?"

"I'm… not exactly sure. In some room. Find me on the map." For a few minutes all he heard was a quiet shuffling as Remus searched.

"James, I don't see you."

"I guess we never found this one before. I don't think it's there all the time. Well, here. Let me step outside for a moment. Figure out where I am and then bring Lily here."

"Oh I see you now. Alright, I'll see if I can get her to come. Best not tell her who we're meeting."

"Probably. See you in a bit."

The mirror turned cloudy and then James saw his own face staring back up at him. Now all he had to do was wait.

* * *

It took fifteen minutes for Remus to find Lily and bring her to the corridor on the map. James had propped the door open so Remus had no trouble locating the room. James jumped up from one of the couches when they entered. He heard the slight intake of breath as the pair felt the strange sensation in the air. That unnamable absence. Lily's eyes hardened when she saw him, but Remus grabbed her arm to keep from leaving.

"What trap is this, Potter?"

"No trap, Lily. It is an offer. You feel that in air? Try a spell, any spell. Try the killing curse for all the good it would. Go ahead, it won't work." He stopped to let her confirm this for herself. "I thought you might find these terms more agreeable. And perhaps you will see that I mean you no harm."

"Just like you meant me no harm last time, is that it?" Yet James saw something on her face that gave him hope. She seemed to be digesting what he had said, and maybe, just maybe, considering it.

"I can sit outside the door if you'd like," Remus offered. For several minutes there was silence. But the two boys did not break it.

Finally Lily looked up, "Okay." James grinned and settled back down into one of the couches. Lily delicately settled herself into a nearby armchair. "Alright, talk." And for a moment James was unable to make a sound. He had devoted so much time and energy to getting her to listen to him, he had never stopped to plan out just what it was he was going to say. And he hadn't expected her to agree so quickly either.

He rubbed his hands together nervously. "I… I just want to know what I did. Why you hate me. What happened to my friend."

Her eyebrows wrinkled up in confusion. "I thought we were done playing games Potter. If that's what this is about then I'm gone. Just leave me alone."

"No Lily, don't leave. I'm not playing games with you. I've been leaving you alone for the past three years. All I want to know is why."

"James I don't understand. You were there. You did it. How could you not know?" Exasperated James' fingers found his hair once more.

"I don't know, Lily. Are you sure it wasn't someone who very closely resembled me who did whatever it was? Was it a low light situation perhaps? Because I honestly have no idea what you're talking about." Lily did not flinch at his sarcasm.

She stuttered for a moment and then stopped. She considered the sincerity in his voice and the fact that he had made himself vulnerable by bringing her here. She considered the fact that she had never told this story before, to anyone, and she considered the fact that maybe it would do her good if she did.

"Shall I tell you a story?"

* * *

**A/N- Oh come on now, don't tell me you didn't see that cliffhanger coming a mile away. So okay, I feel just a tiny bit bad leaving you for six weeks like this. But hey, at least it's not another year right? And at least now you know an explanation is imminent. Just record, I've already written a little less than a page of the next chapter. But it's pretty dense, lots of long paragraphs and such, so there's really more. Ooh, I am rather excited to write it and have you all read it. And don't worry, that's not going to the end of this story. Not at all.**

**Thanks to all the lovely folks who reviewed, may they be an example to us all.**

See you (metaphorically) in six weeks!!  



	13. The Room

**The Room**

_Although Lily Evans was born exactly one hour and twenty-three minutes after her brother Julian, a negligible margin at best, it became the defining feature of their relationship. Even when they were small, he was her protector. In first grade, when the boys tripped her and made her cry, it was always Julian who yelled so fiercely they cowered and ran. And later, when she should have been tormented for her oddities, no one dared to touch her. When Lily got her Hogwarts letter, he was the one who reasoned with a reluctant Petunia. He took on the role of peacekeeper, soothing frazzled nerves and provoked tempers. But her anger didn't last past Lily's departure. Petunia had always been jealous of their special relationship and was secretly glad to have him all to herself. The resentment, however, would never disappear. _

_And then there was that. The magic. The letter. It had been shocking for Lily. For they had the same thick, dark red hair, the same barely visible smattering of freckles, and while his eyes were brown and hers were green, they sparkled in that same secret way. All their lives they had done almost everything together. He had never been too proud to play dress up with her and Lily was never too prissy to race him through the park. They were so close it didn't seem possible that they could be different in such a huge way. _

_Then, on August 13th, Lily and Julian Evans turned thirteen. It was their golden birthday, as the girls at school used to call it. Most of their friends were out of town, so they arranged a nice family dinner to celebrate. Mrs. Evans had been in the kitchen all day cooking up a special meal. Petunia was making an effort to be extra nice and even crowned the pair in identical orange party hats that clashed marvelously with their hair. Sometime during the dinner the party hats slipped towards one another—like magnets—and when their father snapped a picture of them, both laughing hysterically, the points were touching. _

_But then their father had said something. There was always something. Ninety percent of the time he was perfectly lovely but somehow that unfortunate ten percent always seemed like so much more. He had been fired four times already because of that ten percent and the utterly tactless and offensive things that managed to slip through his mental filter. It was as if there really was a physical mesh wall up in his brain, and somehow he had been born with a tiny bit missing. Lily liked to imagine it that way, with little red amorphous shapes of bad thoughts that couldn't get through the netting. Except for the hole. A couple of them were always able to slip through that horrible hole. Her mother had helped her create that little mental picture. In this way a seven year-old Lily had understood that her father didn't mean to say those things. He couldn't fix the hole in his brain. It wasn't his fault that his was broken and most people's weren't. _

_The Evans family was used to these moments, and usually smoothed them over as best they could. But that night, Lily couldn't ignore him. She was usually so good about it... much better than Petunia ever was. Perhaps it was because it was her birthday and she was having such a fine time, or perhaps it was because it really was such an awful thing for a father to say. She remembered the moment perfectly. She had replayed it endlessly in her head, wishing uselessly that if she had only controlled herself, everything would have been alright. But she hadn't controlled herself. And everything had not been alright. _

_He had been laughing at something witty Julian had said. And then he looked over at Lily with a silly grin. There was a glass of wine in his hand… maybe that was it. "You've really grown this year Lily." It took a moment for what he said to register. Lily's height had remained stubbornly unchanged for the past two years. Julian was the one who was shooting up at an alarming rate. She looked down at her chest in horror. Surely **that** wasn't what he meant. But his cackle confirmed her worst suspicious. She looked around the room, which had fallen unbearably quiet except for her father's childlike giggle. And then she tore out of the room. She crushed the paper hat in her hand and threw it in the bin outside the house. The evening light was fading fast and Lily had no idea where she was going, only that she had to get out of there. She was abruptly grateful for all the summers she and Julian had spent wandering around the neighborhood, for she knew all the streets for several miles. She had not been running long when someone grabbed her. _

_An arm wrapped around her waist and she managed one piercing scream before a hand closed over her mouth. Without thinking, she sunk her teeth into his fingers. The man yelped and in his surprise he loosened his grip. Lily slipped out of his grasp and threw herself into a sprint. She wove a twisting path through back alleys and backyards. She raced down dead-end streets and then hopped garden walls until she found road again. All the while she felt him behind her. He was impossible to shake. No matter how circuitous her route, no matter how many obscure paths she chose, he was always there… sometimes only twenty feet back, sometimes so far she couldn't see him at all, but always she could feel his presence. The silent summer night was punctured with the soft thudding of feet on cement. Lily's breathing became labored and heavy, but she refused to slow her pace.__She became aware that his following distance had ceased to fluctuate. He was gaining on her. _

_Her mind sifted through thirteen years of living in the place for some advantage. The idea struck her out of nowhere and with renewed determination she increased her pace. She ducked into an alley and raced to the chain link fence at the end of it. Sucking in her breath, she slipped through the opening, ducking her head to avoid the chain locking it shut. She stopped in front of a circular piece of metal in the street and, grasping onto the handle, pulled it aside. She descended the slippery ladder, careful to pull the metal cover back over the hole once she was through. Ten feet down her feet met water. She gasped from the cold but clenched her hands into fists and let herself drop into the knee high water of the abandoned sewer pipe. It had been damaged in an earthquake seventeen years ago and she had snuck down here half a dozen times before. Only this time, instead of hiding from her own demons, her pursuer was real. She heard a clatter of shoes on the ladder. She quickened her pace, sloshing through the water as silently as she could. _

_She was familiar with a portion of the maze-like sewer system and hurried along those paths she knew. Lily was quite aware that if she got lost there would be no one to find her. Every couple hundred feet a feeble electric light illuminated a small radius of dirty water. Other than that, everything was black, empty as a starless night. She was dragging her feet through two feet of water and now and then she shivered from the cold.__ The ground inclined slightly and the presence of water under feet soon disappeared. Suddenly something lit up twenty feet or so ahead of her. It was a wand. She was sure her pursuer was still behind her, so this must be someone else. But who? She crept forward cautiously and then almost cried out in relief when she saw that it was James. She hurried the rest of the way and threw herself into his arms. _

_"James hurry, there's someone after me, we've got to get out of here. Where did you come in from? Do you remember? We could go out that way, you have to show me." She hurried along the passageway, but after a moment noticed that she only heard the sounds of one pair of feet clopping on the wet cement. She looked back and was surprised to find that James hadn't moved at all. She jogged back over, starting to feel just slightly alarmed. She tugged on his arm, trying to make him follow her. "James did you hear me? Someone's coming. He might kill us if he catches up. James we've got to **move**!" James looked from the arm she had clamped onto to her face. _

_"Don't be silly. Why would someone be chasing you?" Why was he wasting time questioning her?_

_"James this is no joke. We can debate my sanity later. Right now we need to pack some serious heat and get out of here."_

_He let out a short laugh, but there was an unfamiliar edge to it. It wasn't a sound she ever heard come from between those familiar lips before. She narrowed her eyes at him._

_"Oh Lily, you really are a silly girl. You always were so excitable." He gave his head a patronizing shake and gazed down in a way that somehow emphasized the very great height discrepancy between the two. Lily felt acutely small and for a second frowned, wondering if James realized he had that effect. But she had no time to dwell on that now… they had bigger fish to fry. She nervously shifted from one foot to the other, beginning to feel panicky. Any second that man was going to appear from around the bend and she wouldn't even have time to say 'I told you so' because they would in serious trouble._

_She grabbed James' hand and tried to forcibly pull him down the passageway. "Come **on** James. We've got to **move**." Of course, Lily trying to physically force James to do anything was laughable and he remained entirely immobile, feet firmly planted on the ground. _

_Something whirled out from around the bend Lily had been so anxiously watching and she very nearly shrieked before she recognized her very own brother. He called out her name in relief and hurried over. He appeared to have slipped off the ladder in his hurry and even his red hair hung in dripping ropes. He grabbed both of his sister's shoulders and sighed in relief. He spoke in a tone of slight bewilderment, though never lacking affection, and shook his head as if amused. "What are you doingdown here?"_

_In her surprise Lily had forgotten her fear. Now it boiled up once more from the pit of her stomach. He had to understand the gravity of the situation. "Oh Julian someone was chasing me, I don't know why. You know where the other exits are, we've got to get out of here." Julian's eyebrows shot up in shock and his expression immediately revised itself to one of seriousness and concentration. Finally someone was taking her seriously. She almost let out a sigh of relief herself, though they were far from out of danger. She reached out to either side and slipped her hands into those of each of her boys. "Let's go."_

_Lily's heart stopped as she heard the much-dreaded sound of approaching footsteps. This time she knew it was him. The three whirled around to face their cloaked opponent. He did not rush forward, but rather walked with a determined slowness. He was confident that his prey would not run again. When he was six or seven feet away, he stopped where he was and smirked._

_With a loud pop several people appeared beside him, all of their faces obscured by hoods. Lily reestablished her grip on James' and Julian's hands. The men all seemed to be waiting for something. She heard one them whisper, "He's coming soon." _

_One of the shorter cloaked figures stepped forward and delicately pushed back its hood. Lily was slightly startled to see a girl not so much older than herself staring at her with malice. She could only have just graduated from school. _

_"Hello little muggles," she whispered, eyes glinting wildly. She took a few catlike steps forward and grinned. Then an unfamiliar voice pierced the damp air. _

_"You really must try not to play with your food Bellatrix, at least not when it's someone else's meal." The girl mumbled an earnest apology and slunk back to join the others, obscuring her face once more in the shadows of her hood._

_Lily hadn't even heard the telltale pop of apparition, yet a new figure had appeared. This was clearly the one they had been waiting for. She could see it the way they all adjusted their positions and even stood up straighter when he appeared. This man was not wearing a hood and Lily choked in horror when she saw that face, that horrible face that surely could not be human. The slitted eyes, that snake-like nose…she shivered involuntarily. He stepped forward. _

_"Do you know who I am, Evans twins?" It was that same, unfamiliar voice. It ventured just scarcely louder than a whisper and Lily realized this was not someone who needed to be loud to be heard. And he knew it. Lily gulped and nodded slowly. "And what about little Julian? Let's see how much his sister has been reading to him from the papers."_

_"I know who you are." Lily felt a small surge of pride at his unwavering voice. Even now, when she needed to protect him from the dangers of a world he did not understand, his courage outshone her own._

_"And has she taught you to fear my name just like the rest of those sniveling cowards." He leaned forwards slightly but Julian refused to take a step back._

_"No, Voldemort, she hasn't." _

_Lily slipped her hand out of her brother's and slowly withdrew her wand. She half hoped that the Dark Lord would not notice but was not so foolish as to assume that he wouldn't. She suddenly found her other hand empty as James' pulled away as well. He did have to defend himself too. _

_Voldemort__ was only a few feet away from Julian now. _

_"I am not interested in killing you, Muggle. At least not today. All I require is that you step aside. Generosity from Lord Voldemort is a rare thing; I suggest you do not squander it." _

_Julian crossed his arms over his chest and pursed his lips in determination._

_"No."_

_"Step aside and your life will be spared."_

_Lily was beginning to feel panicky again. "Julian," she hissed, "stop playing the damn hero and get out of the way. This isn't like school. He has power you don't. This isn't your world."_

_Voldemort's__ lips curled up in something that made him appear both amused and sinister at the same time. "Unusually good advice from a mudblood, Julian… if I were you, though I shudder at the thought, I would take it." _

_"How unfortunate, then, that you are not." Lily had no idea where her brother's bravado had come from—she herself was trembling with fear—and for a moment doubted that they were really as similar as she had always thought._

_"Don't be foolish child. It's not you we want. The Dark Lord does not ask twice." Lily tried to pull Julian behind her, to safety, but it was just as it had been with James. He barely had to strain to resist. Voldemort seemed to take his lack of compliancy as an answer._

_"No, then?__ How unfortunate indeed. And I really wasn't going to kill you." Cruel, haughty laughter pierced the darkness and Lily realized it was that same too-young girl from before. A horrible shiver of foreboding ran down her spine._

_The pale fingers slowly slid a wand out from within the folds of his robes and held it aloft. _

_"Avada Kedavra!" Lily gasped in horror as the bolt of green light illuminated the body in front of her, seeming to enter it and cause it to remain upright a moment after it's owner could not, before flowing out and letting the empty body collapse to the floor, like a puppet whose strings have been simultaneously severed. _

_"How very pathetic."__ Lily's jaw dropped as she sensed that the words had come from behind her. James was slumped against the sewer wall, have slunk away without her notice some time before, but now straightened up and walked over to Lily._

_"So weak.__ So naïve. I would have thought a third year witch more capable than to let her **muggle** brother defend her from the Dark Lord." His lips pealed up into a pleased grin as he laughed. "How can you ever look at yourself without shame again? And trusting me… so loyal, so damn goodhearted that she wouldn't leave me behind. And look at the consequences. Look who has sacrificed themselves for your misjudgment. Look at him, Lily!" The last bit came out as a hiss and all at once she became aware that she was shaking uncontrollably. She felt everything unraveling around her at a remarkable speed and it left her breathless. She didn't realize she had fallen to her knees until the loud smacking noise and piercing pain alerted her._

_And then dozens of popping noises filled the air. The cloaked men were gone. And with a start Lily saw that James was gone with them. Now that the danger had past, her ability to suppress the stress that had been building all night waned. Many hands grabbed hold of her just before she blacked out._

_Later she would learn how she had been rescued. How the Death Eaters had disapparated just as the first Aurors appeared. How they had explained it to Lily's family while she lay in a drug-induced sleep upstairs. They never had gotten the full story out of her. No one had. Not her family, not her friends. _

_But that lifeless face never ceased to haunt her dreams as a constant reminder of her own cowardice._

_Petunia would never forgive her. _

_And her knees remained bruised for weeks._

Lily had said all of this is a soft but unwavering voice and her gaze had remained firmly attached to her shoes. But she looked up now, when her story finished and for a moment she felt sickened. She remembered who she was talking to. The one who had detained her when her life had depended on time. When **his** life had been depending on time. How on earth had she been persuaded to talk about this? But when she examined James' face she saw the strangest expression. He looked… horrified. He leaned towards her, his eyes begging something of her… maybe just that she would listen to him.

"But Lily," he breathed. "You have to… that wasn't **me**." No it hadn't been attention they sought, it was belief.

"Excuse me?" She had expected excuses and explanations… threats or deals with Death Eaters or hostages. Never anything like this.

"I don't… I don't completely understand what happened that night. But, whoever was there… that night in the sewer with you. I don't know who it was, but whoever it was, that person wasn't me. I don't… I'm not sure how to make you believe me." His entire face seemed to be pleading with her now. But how **could** she believe him? If he was telling the truth—as strange a possibility as that was to entertain—than there had been an imposter. But just as easily, he could be lying now…only trying to win over her good favor in preparation for some bigger and more terrible betrayal yet to come. How could she possibly know where the truth really lay?

She was distracted when James suddenly leapt to his feet. "I wonder…" he mused out loud, "if this room could become **anything** we needed. What could make you believe me Lily?" It was strange to see him like this, charged and excited. And forcefully determined. "Come on, surely there is something."

"I guess the simplest thing would be if I could know—for certain—that you were telling the truth." He grinned at her brilliantly.

"Of course, you're a genius. I would have thought up something far too complicated." Then he turned away slightly, and seemed to address the space itself. "Excuse me, uh… room. We need a room where lies cannot be spoken. Oh and also… a room that does not respond to the orders of James Potter, after this one, until he leaves the room that is." The last part seemed to be an afterthought, but addressed the very worry that had struck Lily. She would have to test it. _Petunia Evans is a pureblood witch._ She almost snorted at the thought. She tried to voice the sentence, but couldn't get past the name.

"Impressive," she mused. James stared her in the eye, and declared loudly, "I, James Potter, was not present at the aforementioned events on August the thirteenth. I did not assist with the circumstances that led up to the death of Julian Evans nor have I ever betrayed Lily Evans in action or in thought. I have only the greatest scorn for the one who calls himself Lord Voldemort." He stopped for a moment and sent her a painful look. Then it softened. "And I miss my friend." He was already on his feet. He took a few steps in her direction, and when she didn't respond in anger, carefully settled himself next to her on the couch. Lily hardly noticed him, her mind reeling.

"Oh fuck." It seemed the only way to articulate the great whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that had suddenly assaulted her. James looked around the room in confusion.

"Did I do something? I can move." He made to leave but she grasped hold of his sleeve to keep him there.

"No. It's just… I've really screwed things up haven't I?" He laughed in surprise.

"Oh, is that all?"

"All?" she questioned in disgust. "James, look at what I've done. Look at what I've done to **you**."

"Lily." And she was surprised to find his voice soft. "You have been the victim of a cruel and elaborate plot. If it is a crime to believe things to be as they are observed to be, then whole world ought to be locked up. How could anyone blame you?"

"How could anyone not?" He reached out slowly and took her hand, hoping to ease the horrified expression of her face.

"Lily. For me to blame you, to reject you as you rejected me would be to play right into their hands. To extend the damage they have wrought even further than it has already spread. To forgive is to fight. And that's exactly what I intend to do." And then her eyes became as soft as his, and she threw herself into his arms for the first time in three years.

He made a slight noise of surprise, but then found his arms wrapping around her of their own accord, his hand reaching up to stroke that glimmering red hair. Remus had been right. She had been worth fighting for.

Slowly she slid out of his arms, looking almost embarrassed. But she didn't withdraw entirely, her hands still resting gently on his forearms. "So what do we do James? Pretend as if nothing has happened? As if nothing has changed? How can we?" He smiled at her then, and somehow she knew he could figure whatever this situation was that they found themselves.

"We can't, of course. And so we don't. We don't pretend that nothing happened. We act as though what has actually happened has happened. Nothing less and nothing more. Why complicate the situation by pretending?" It was a strange thing to suddenly realize that she had missed him. It had been clouded by hatred but it must have always been there.

"I'd forgotten how wise you are sometimes. I guess it **can** be that simple… if we want it to be." She let out a sigh of contentment and leaned her head back on his shoulder. "Look at this room. It's amazing. Did you know this is my favorite color? The walls that is. The exact color I would paint my room, if I ever did."

His lips turned up into a silly grin. The room was amazing indeed, for he was sitting in it with her and she was not yelling or jumping away in fright. For it had been fear, as he had so astutely guessed, that had colored the anger. He slid an arm around her shoulders, just to revel in the fact that she did not pull away but rather snuggled into it.

"It really is something. It's almost a pity that I'll never come back." Her eyebrows furrowed up in confusion.

"Why wouldn't you come back? I mean think of how useful a place like this could be."

He turned to face her, his arm sliding back to his side of the couch as he did, and looked directly into her eyes.

"You see, that's exactly why I won't come back. I supposed it's a bit silly really, but I just sort of decided. Look at what this place has done for me… for us. Finally sorted out this thing that maybe would never have been resolved another way. To abuse the room, to take advantage of this awesome power, would be an insult. It would to minimize what it has done today."

She cocked her head slightly to the side and looked at him curiously. "You really are an interesting fellow James. It's strange, to be certain, but there's almost something noble about it. I guess I won't come back either…at least unless something of this magnitude comes up in the future."

James grinned even wider. Then he pulled Lily to her feet and together they walked to the door. When they opened it, they found a sleeping Remus leaned against the wall. Lily giggled and James poked him a few times with his foot.

"Wah?" He blinked in confusion and looked up at them blearily. Then he appraised the situation, the lack of hostility from Lily despite the physical proximity… and he smiled. "Looks like you finally got something right, mate."

James laughed and tried to scowl. "Get off the floor. You're damn lucky Filch didn't come along." Remus yawned and gave a few halfhearted nods. But he pulled himself to his feet and threw the shimming cloak over them. James and Lily looked back to see the outline of the door melting into the wall.

And then they said their silent goodbyes to the room forever.

* * *

**A/N- So I really hoped you all liked it. And much more than usual. I've never been horribly concerned with pleasing my audience. That is to say, I want people to like it, and I try to do the best writing I can (without editing a million times)…but I've never thought about it living up to anyone's standards other than my own. That said, for the first time I was really hoping that I hadn't disappointed anyone. I've kept you all waiting so long for this, I really feel like I owe it to you all to make this a really bom chapter. I can only hope I've delivered.**

**If you're curious, I did reference all of the flashbacks to this scene that occur throughout the story. It should be pretty easy to see where they fit in, if you can't figure it out just mention it in your review and I'll explain. There are some direct quotations, although I often stuck in things between them or reworded some things… after all, Lily's dream memories would not be exactly the same as the real thing. Also, I was re-reading the previous chapter. I should clarify that when Remus said James still loved Lily, he didn't mean he was IN love with her. At least to his knowledge, James has only ever felt the love of friendship for Lily.**

**Oh and thanks so much for all the reviews last chapter, I got almost double the amount of the chapter before. I only got to read a few while I was away but I'm enjoying the rest now as I slowly go through my what began as over 300 ffnet alerts (I'm down to 190 now). And just for the record, I absolutely loved Harry Potter 7. I thought I was going to be so sad when it was over, but I really wasn't at all. It really felt like it was over and there wasn't anything left to tell. I'm also really glad to be writing about Lily and James because I'm worried I'd have lost my inspiration to write about that timeline now that everything's been so neatly tied up. That is not to say at all that I won't still be enjoying all the stories I read… not in the slightest. **

**Also, I realized something sort of cool. So when I first laid out some background for this story, I wrote out this scene. Not an actual narrative, but like the way I would explain it to someone. After I finished the first draft of this chapter, I remembered that I had done that and figured I might as well look it over and see if there were any extra ideas in there that I could add. I should note that I hadn't read it over for a year or two. And while there were a few changes and tons of additions, there wasn't really anything I'd forgotten. Although I refined it, the core of my original vision stayed true in my head all this time. Kind of neat, I thought.**

**Oh and this story isn't over. I can't imagine how anyone could think it was… but that's happened to me a couple times, where I wasn't sure. Believe me, when this story ends, it will be written there at the bottom in black and white so there isn't any confusion. Besides, I wouldn't dream of leaving you guys in the lurch about what happens to ****Sydney**

**Review?**


	14. Imaginary Sundress

**Imaginary Sundress**

A bang like a shotgun went off and Lily lurched out of her dream and into a sitting position. _What on earth? _She yanked her maroon hangings apart and found herself facing the rather sheepish expressions of Jana and Corbin. On the carpet was something black that had twisted into an unrecognizable shape and was now sending a thick pinkish smoke into the air.

"Uh, sorry Lils," said Jana with a grimace as she attempted to cease the mystery object's proliferation of smoke. It merely sparked and flopped over half-heartedly. Lily re-shut her hangings; she was nowhere near being ready to awaken yet. It wasn't especially early, but she had been up very late last night… _last night! _Lily lurched into a sitting position as the momentous events of the previous evening came rushing back to her. A surge of happiness sent warmth flooding through her stomach. Any thoughts of going back to sleep were immediately abandoned and she hopped up and slid out of bed onto the floor.

She dressed in a daze, almost pulling on her robes before remembering it was the weekend. She ran down the staircase, wondering if James had already gone to breakfast or was still asleep. She considered waking him up if he was before deciding that would be strange and uncalled for. Lily's mind was so preoccupied that she tripped over the last stair and did an awkward but impressive front flip in the air before landing on her knees with a loud thunk. Lily gasped in pain as her kneecaps collided with the hardwood floor.

Sirius rushed over, utterly failing to contain his laughter. But then, appearing out of nowhere was James, and this time when he extended his hand she grasped it and allowed him to pull her to her feet.

"Thanks James."

He grinned broadly and pulled her to him, his arms slipping around her waist. For a moment she found her nose pleasantly smushed into the luxurious cashmere of his sweater and a changed but familiar scent filled her lungs. He tilted his head so that his lips brushed against her ear and whispered softly, "This should have been last time." Unbidden, James' thirteen-year-old face came before her eyes, masked in hurt and confusion as she refused his help that morning on the platform. She had wasted so much time.

Lily did not feel James slip away from her, but when she looked up he was back next to Sirius and they had been joined by Kelly, Remus, and Peter… and everyone but Remus was gaping at her in shock.

Kelly could do nothing but stutter. "So you…last night…you…I mean…what?"

Now it was Lily's turn to chortle. "Um, yes?" Lily replied, not entirely sure what question she was answering. She was enjoying this moment of torment, but it was probably wise that James chose that moment to step in; Kelly's cheeks had been getting progressively redder.

"We, uh, talked some things out last night." He ran a nervous hand through his unmanageable hair and glanced uncertainly at Lily.

"What sort of things?" questioned Kelly, shooting Lily a meaningful glance. Lily suddenly became alarmed. Telling the story last night had been trying enough, she did not think she could bear to relive that night again, certainly not a mere matter of hours later, perhaps not ever. James seemed to gather something of this from her expression of unadulterated panic, "It turns out there was a bit of a misunderstanding. We sorted it out, but I'm afraid the incident is solely between Lily and myself. Suffice to say, we are once again on the best of terms." Lily nodded, smiling in relief.

Sirius jumped forward and scooped Lily into a huge bear hug, lifting her several feet off the ground. He successfully broke the tension by crying out, "Hurray! Now we can all be one big happy family."

Once Lily had extricated herself from Sirius' grip, Peter insisted that they continue their celebrations downstairs, preferably within arm's reach of some breakfast. Sirius' stomach growled in agreement and with overdramatic enthusiasm, he grabbed Peter by the hood of his sweatshirt and tossed him out through the portrait hole. There was a low grunt followed by a high pitched shriek. The group hurried over to see what had happened, unsure whether to be concerned or amused. Lily arrived first and decided the situation fell into the latter category. She couldn't be certain, but it seemed as though someone had been about to crawl through the portrait hole when Peter had been so unceremoniously dumped on top of her. If Lily hadn't known better, she would have found the position she now found him in to be rather compromising.

The gold and lavender shape beneath him gave an unglamorous grunt and attempted to shove the boy's face away from its presently alarming proximity to her chest. But Peter was in far too deep a daze to move. Over his bulky shoulder Lily managed to make out one china-blue eye squinted into a death glare.

Just in time, James and Sirius seemed to decide they had allowed their friend to flounder long enough. With a sigh, they seized him by his armpits and lifted him away from whatever poor creature he had crushed. Lily looked down to see exactly who that poor creature had been. She decided she might have to revise her chosen adjective.

Claire Gold took another moment to glare venomously at her assailant before rising as gracefully as possible to her feet. For a moment she made a desperate attempt to smooth the spider web of wrinkles that spanned the length of her lavender blouse before abandoning the futile effort. She flipped her golden hair over her shoulder in a gesture that was clearly meant to be intimidating, and which clearly demonstrated her obliviousness to the amusing state of disarray the aforementioned locks were presently in. Lily choked back a giggle as the girl turned to face her. Lily gulped as Claire looked down her nose at the red-head. Where her silly gesture had failed, her five inch advantage was much more successful. Claire glared at Lily as if she were personally responsible for Peter's badly timed landing.

"Stupid, clumsy, perverted boy! Don't you dare touch me again." Peter seemed to shrink visibly under the verbal assault. He nodded feebly and moved imperceptibly so that he stood slightly behind Sirius. James chuckled at his lack of bravado.

Claire stood there for a moment, perhaps waiting for some further excuse for abuse, before whirling on her heels and sauntering over to the portrait hole and out of sight.

There was a moment of silence and then everyone let out their repressed laughter at once. James crinkled his nose in disgust, "What an unpleasant girl." This seemed to sum up the interaction so aptly that no further commentary was necessary, and they continued on their way to breakfast.

* * *

After dinner the newly reconciled group split off into twos and threes with different destinations and without quite realizing it, Remus found his feet walking the now-familiar hallways that led to the infirmary. When he realized where he was going he hesitated for a moment before continuing around the last few bends and through the doorway. It was strange to be here alone before curfew, without James' cloak. Pomfrey's face peered out at him through a window from her office and moment later she came bustling into the lobby.

"Oh dear, does my lunascope need to be recalibrated again? I could have sworn there was at least another week." Remus couldn't help but laugh.

"No, no. It's nothing like that. I had some free time and was wondering if I could visit with Miss Schwartz." He tried to make it casual, as if there was nothing odd about him coming alone. There was no reason that Pomfrey should know that he was not one of Sydney's closest friends… but he had always had a lurking suspicion that the tight-lipped matron saw a lot more than she let on.

She opened the door for him and pulled one the visitor's chairs over next to Sydney's bed. Then she turned back to Remus, who had followed her in at a distance. She looked like she was about to head back to her office, but on an impulse he stopped her,

"Wait. How…How's she doing?" Remus bit his lip nervously and nurse gave him a fleeting half smile. She walked over to the foot of the bed and pulled out a thick manila folder and began shuffling through the multitude of charts and forms.

"Well… her coma has been stabilized for the last few months. We can maintain her this way for several years, but of course the goal is to revive her as soon as possible. I've tried numerous potions to wake her up but to be honest I'm afraid to do anything too drastic until we pinpoint the cause more precisely." She paused then, as if she had said too much. Remus replayed her last few words,

"But then does that mean you do vaguely know what the cause is?" he asked, trying to keep the panic that had suddenly welled up in his chest out of his voice. He couldn't be sure how well he had succeeded.

There was a strangely loud exhalation of breath from the matron and it occurred to Remus that he might have just witnessed Pomfrey swearing. He looked up and her eyes gazed penetratingly into his own. Then she sighed.

"I'm not really supposed to tell any of the students. Don't want to start a panic. But you're used to keeping secrets; you're on my side of the wall in that regard. I suppose if there's anyone I could tell, it would be you. But this doesn't leave this room, you hear? No James. No Lily. And for the love all that is holy, no Sirius." Remus nodded gravely,

"Right." Then he looked up expectantly and waited to hear what she would say.

"Alright. So you are aware that there are several wizarding ailments that do not affect those with non-magical blood? Many are not serious and easily cured, but others are quite rare and more dangerous. Your friend had one of the later variety. As long as she took her potions regularly, she wasn't in any danger. But then she collapsed and I have no idea why. **That** is not a known aspect of the disease she did have. So I don't know if this is a new form of that disease or something else altogether. I've contacted an associate of mine at St. Mungo's and he is now collaborating on this project with me. He has some interesting ideas. But… we're in uncharted territory and as such the future is most unpredicatable. There now, I've said far too much. Have a nice visit with your friend. I'll be in my office." Remus' breathing had gotten dangerously shallow and he struggled for moment to normalize it. The nurse was almost to the doorway before he got it under control.

"Wait!" he called out, still breathless and now the panic in his voice unmistakable. "Please wait," he said, much softer this time, but just as desperate. Startled, the nurse turned to face him, one eyebrow raised in a silent question. But Remus did not know how to verbalize the emotion that had seized hold of his heart, the burning panic that raced through his veins. "I just…I…you have to," he broke off when he realized his stuttering was entirely incoherent. He took a very deep breath. Then another one. Then he tried again. His voice was barely above a whisper, "You have to save her. Please."

Madam Pomfrey took a few faltering steps towards the boy, looking very alarmed. And then, quite suddenly, his knees gave way and he landed ungraciously in the chair behind him.

"Oh dear, Lupin. I should have known this would be… difficult to hear. But we're really doing all we can." Remus stared mutely at the floor tiles.

"Lupin?" she asked, hesitantly. His eyes snapped up to meet hers.

"You have to save her," he repeated. "You have to because…because I'm in love with her." Both their eyes widened with shock, for neither had known until he had spoken the words aloud. The nurse put a hand on his shoulder,

"I'll try, Remus, I'll try." And then she was gone and he was alone. Alone with her.

He turned the chair so that he was facing her bed and very slowly he reached one of his hands out to tough the fragile skin of her wrist. It was so much paler than he had ever seen her skin before. And her arms were stick thin, all the muscles built up from years of throwing quaffles faded away until there was nothing left but bone and skin. Absentmindedly he traced one of the blue veins that could be clearly seen through the translucent, milky skin. But even though her round face was all angles now, it was still **her** and he stared in wonder. He had wasted so much time.

And with that thought in mind he leaned over, folding his arms on the pillow and resting his chin on top of them. He began whispering to her, his lips mere inches from her right ear,

"Sydney, can you hear me? It's Remus. I know you're lost in there somewhere, but I need you to find your way out, okay? I don't know what's going on, or if you can hear me, or if you even remember who I am. But if you can understand me, please listen. I need you to come back. There's some important stuff you haven't done yet. There's some important stuff I haven't done yet. Stuff I should have done a long time ago. Sydney, you have to come back. You have to come back so I can tell you something, alright? I need to tell you that… that I love you. And you have to come back so I can do that. You have to."

* * *

Sydney walked through the trees at leisurely pace. She was utterly at peace and there was no reason to rush through this pleasant walk. The wildflowers were in bloom and they dotted the lush grass in a rainbow of shades, each one more vibrant than the last. Up ahead she saw a small pond. The sunlight shone brightly off its mirror-smooth surface and she wondered absently if there were fish inside. As she approached the pond, a handful of purple butterflies fluttered past and settled on a nearby flowering bush.

She looked up towards the sky and smiled broadly. It was a bright, clear blue muffled only by a scattering of perfect, puffy-white clouds. She felt sure that if she could touch one it would be soft and springy, like cotton. The sun beat down on her face, warming it without being overbearing. The grass was wild and tall, brushing her fingertips as she strode through it.

She was at the shore of the pond now; it was larger than it had appeared from further back. The dirt bank was smooth and untouched, interrupted only by a smallish boulder. She walked up next to it and stood as close as she could get to the water's edge without wetting her toes.

Then she heard a voice, "Sydney?" It was whispered very quietly, but there was no mistaking it. Startled, she whirled around. It had seemed to come from behind the boulder. She hurried over to check. But there was nothing there. Then it came again, louder this time and more distinct,

"Can you hear me?" it whispered. Now it seemed to be coming from within the boulder itself. Or perhaps from somewhere beneath the pond. She stumbled back over to the shore, slipping in the mud this time so that her feet slid into the water. But there was nothing there. There weren't even any fish. The surface was only troubled by the ripples her own feet had made when they had disturbed its glassy surface. But it spoke again, and every world came to her louder than the one before, "It's Remus."

"Remus?" she whispered back in awe. What was he doing here? And where was he hiding? And why he was he hiding from her, anyways? "I can hear you. I'm right here." But he didn't seem to have heard her.

"I know you're lost in there somewhere, but I need you to find your way out, okay?" This time the voice seemed to come from everywhere at once: the boulder, the lake, the trees, the sky, within her own mind. It echoed through the air as if the very earth had spoken to her. She felt a shiver of fear and slowly backed out of the pond. She looked towards the ground and sucked in a terrified gasp of air: her shoes and socks remained dry and clean. What was Remus talking about anyways, she wasn't lost? He was the one that was hiding. Then the voice came again,

"I don't know what's going on, or if you can hear me, or if you even remember who I am. But if you can understand me, please listen. I need you to come back. There's some important stuff you haven't done yet. There's some important stuff I haven't done yet. Stuff I should have done a long time ago."

All at once Sydney became aware that she was dreaming. The notion was instantaneous and she stumbled in surprise, falling backwards onto the grass. She pressed her ear against the moist earth, as if the voice might come to clearly this way.

"Sydney, you have to come back. You have to come back so I can tell you something, alright? I need to tell you that… that I love you. And you have to come back so I can do that. You have to."

She lurched upwards, and cried out, "Remus!" But the voice had begun fading partway through and she only just made out the last whispered plea. With that first realization came another, more terrifying one: she was trapped. Remus was telling her that, and begging her to escape, to fight, to break free and come back to him. What was she doing in this strange and beautiful place? And more disconcertingly, why had she never questioned her presence here before now? She felt certain that Remus was not a part of her dream, that somewhere out there in the real world he was speaking to her, wherever she was. Another terrifying thought: that her body should be somewhere else, that this wasn't her real body at all. She looked downwards automatically. She was wearing a white sundress with white mary-janes and white socks. She didn't even own a sundress.

Kelly had always told her that if you know you are dreaming you can control the course of your dreams and change them. Shouldn't she have woken up after becoming aware? Could she wake herself up now? She wasn't sure how to go about doing so. _Wake up. I want to wake up now. I'm going to close my eyes, and when I open them up I'm going to be awake and I'm going to give Remus an enormous hug for saving me._ Her eyes fluttered open. She was sitting on a grassy hill next to a pond. She sighed in disappointment. She stood up, brushed the dirt off her imaginary sundress, and raised her arms to the heavens,

"Wake up." Nothing happened. She sucked in a lungful of air, "WAKE UP!" she screamed as loud as she could. A tear of frustration slid down her cheek. She wiped it away angrily. She was utterly trapped. She ran her hands through the long blond hair that hung down her back.

Somewhere out there Remus was fighting for her. Trying to bring her back. And now that she realized she was gone, she desperately wanted to be back too. How long had she been in this dream world? Then she remembered…

Somewhere out there Remus was in love with her. In love with her! She had had no idea. And yet, perhaps it made sense. He was always so sweet to her, always wanting to help her, making her laugh. She wondered why she had never noticed before. She realized the Remus was always somewhere near the edges of things, never in the center of activity. He was an observer. A man of few words. Yet when he spoke it always seemed to have a purpose. Nothing was wasted.

And she was wasting time! She had to get out of there or it wouldn't matter if a hundred men were in love with her. If she didn't get out she wasn't ever going to see him again to find out what she felt in return. She shuddered at the thought and for a moment was filled with despair. And then determination.

That wasn't going to happen.

She was going to get out.

She was going to fight.

For Remus.

And for herself.

She clenched her hands into fists of determination.

* * *

Remus was lost in thought, his hand in hers, staring at her face but no longer seeing it. He wondered how long he had before Madam Pomfrey kicked him out. Then he felt the barest flicker of something, so brief and so gentle that he almost wasn't certain it had happened at all. No, it had happened. He couldn't have imagined that. He wouldn't have dared to allow himself to imagine that. Yet it had happened. Which had to mean…she had just squeezed his hand.

His jaw dropped in shock.

* * *

**And that is the end of another chapter :) This bit of plot has been floating around for a while, but definitely was not in my original layout…which I have basically passed by anyways. I don't think I had anything past Lily's story really concretely planned out. But I haven't looked at my old notes in ages, so I could be wrong. **

**I should also apologize if there are many mistakes, I just finished this tonight and read through it once (though the first bit had already been proofed once or twice) so that I could put this up before I go to bed. That is probably the least amount of editing I have ever done on a chapter. I hope it doesn't show too badly. **

**That was a long one too! (seriously, it went onto the 8th page...I usually write 6-7) You guys definitely deserved it, though, after that long wait. So pretty much all my crazy school stuff is over by now (as well as my crazy personal stuff) so I _hope_ I will be getting more chances to write in the near future. But I should tell you now that after this I owe my Twilight guys an update on _Being Sane in Insane Places_, so I'll be doing that chapter next. It's their turn, what can I say. **

**If you're really impatient you could always check that one out, you really don't need to know anything about the book to read it…it is basically the back story of one of the characters (are you guys noticing a pattern?) based on the very small amount of information given in the book and the premise set up by the book. All you really need to know is that there are some vampires involved. I really like it, but I might be biased (In fact I used to like it more than this story, but then I got back into this one and now I couldn't tell you) **

**So I would absolutely adore some reviews from my ever-loyal and ever-charming readers :D **

**(seriously guys, I appreciate all of you putting up with me being a crazy-slow updater)**

**Until we meet again…**


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